Nothing I say....

... on the topic of bicycle maintenance has any validity from this moment on.
I beamed some weeks ago in another thread about how a generous neighbour had given me an old aluminium Spesh Langster he no longer used.
It was lovely, but in need of love and attention. Off came all the parts, in went a new BB and new cones for the front wheel.
I re-sprayed it from dog-poo brown with strange skull decals to a lovely shade of Maglia Rosa pink.
Every part came off, was replaced or cleaned and re-fitted with appropriate grease and care.
Then, after a few runs to the shop I took it for its first proper ride. After two miles of which one of my shoes started to move in an eccentric fashion. Surely Crank Bros cleats hadn't come loose?
No, they hadn't..... A few hundred yards further up the road the left crank parted company with the bicycle. There is almost no sillier feeling on the planet than riding up a hill with one foot waving in the air, attached to an egg-beater and a swinging crank.
Luckily for me, the bike was in fixed mode, so the ride home was easy if slightly comical.
It would appear that I'd neglected to tighten the crank on as God (or similar) intended.
I hereby denounce any technical advice I have ever given on this or any other forum as baseless and mendacious. The same applies to any advice I may feel obliged to offer in future.
I never found the missing bolt, but know where it probably is to within half a mile or so.
I beamed some weeks ago in another thread about how a generous neighbour had given me an old aluminium Spesh Langster he no longer used.
It was lovely, but in need of love and attention. Off came all the parts, in went a new BB and new cones for the front wheel.
I re-sprayed it from dog-poo brown with strange skull decals to a lovely shade of Maglia Rosa pink.
Every part came off, was replaced or cleaned and re-fitted with appropriate grease and care.
Then, after a few runs to the shop I took it for its first proper ride. After two miles of which one of my shoes started to move in an eccentric fashion. Surely Crank Bros cleats hadn't come loose?
No, they hadn't..... A few hundred yards further up the road the left crank parted company with the bicycle. There is almost no sillier feeling on the planet than riding up a hill with one foot waving in the air, attached to an egg-beater and a swinging crank.
Luckily for me, the bike was in fixed mode, so the ride home was easy if slightly comical.
It would appear that I'd neglected to tighten the crank on as God (or similar) intended.
I hereby denounce any technical advice I have ever given on this or any other forum as baseless and mendacious. The same applies to any advice I may feel obliged to offer in future.
I never found the missing bolt, but know where it probably is to within half a mile or so.
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2020 Voodoo Marasa
2017 Cube Attain GTC Pro Disc 2016
2016 Voodoo Wazoo
Its a dry sump and I kept filling up the engine until the oil registered on the feeler gauge.
Cue low loader and a bill from the Aston garage to drain the engine and refill with fresh oil.
In the words of a mechanic at the dealership, " I don't which is worse, owners that don't touch their cars or owners who do"
That was me told!
Now fast forward to a quick bunch of cyclists and me, who is not so quick. I have a puncture, its winter and cold. I'm not adept with working with my hands and I'm a slower inner tube changer than cyclist
The moral, accept the limitations of nature and adapt!
Desmond Tutu