Fantastic Monday

Matthewfalle

Afternoon all

Lie in until 10, moca pot has been working overtime, sun streaming in through open doors, hound sunning himself in the garden, bambini not killing each other, muzak a go-go. What a blimmin' marvellous start to the week.

May even go and look at a bicycle later.

pinno

Another bike?

Don't think many agree with you matth. However, what started as miserable, dreich and damp ended up sunny. Work was a cruise today, wish it was like that everyday. Best of all, the wannabe OH has had her shift cancelled tonight. Wahey.
Now I am waiting for the Penne Rigate to cook as I am preparing a salad.

Laters.

PS Do we send flowers to Stevo seen as Boro' got stuffed proper by the trattor boys? I bet he'd like that.

Stevo_666

Not sure they're ready to be PL whipping boys like Norwich are about to be again...

Productive day - went shopping with Stressbag & Stropteen in Blackheath had some good coffee and sausage sarnies, cleaned out the fish pond pump/filter and de-weeded the patio. Then went for a run. Dinner and chill time approaching and a 4 day week ahead. So not too bad.

Matthewfalle

I'm not Matth. And I thought you loved me.

Well fukkk you all.

tlw1

Chilled start, then a decent ride with the lads

Now the local festival waiting for ac/dc UK to start, we will leave quickly after

pinno

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth. And I thought you loved me.

Well fukkk you all.

Soz mate. I went off you when you went brunette after being blonde.

@ matth - Did you get a look at the bike?

Matthewfalle

pinarello001 wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth. And I thought you loved me.

Well fukkk you all.

Soz mate. I went off you when you went brunette after being blonde.

@ matth - Did you get a look at the bike?

I'm still the same boy underneath, no matter what up top is. Collars don't always match cuffs as I said to the one eyed dwarf who propositioned me for casual no post contact contact sexual favours in a pub the other night. And that's a serious story....

pinno

Matthewfalle wrote:

pinarello001 wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth. And I thought you loved me.

Well fukkk you all.

Soz mate. I went off you when you went brunette after being blonde.

@ matth - Did you get a look at the bike?

I'm still the same boy underneath, no matter what up top is. Collars don't always match cuffs as I said to the one eyed dwarf who propositioned me for casual no post contact contact sexual favours in a pub the other night. And that's a serious story....

:shock:

What sort of pubs do you go into?

Matthewfalle

pinarello001 wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

pinarello001 wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth. And I thought you loved me.

Well fukkk you all.

Soz mate. I went off you when you went brunette after being blonde.

@ matth - Did you get a look at the bike?

I'm still the same boy underneath, no matter what up top is. Collars don't always match cuffs as I said to the one eyed dwarf who propositioned me for casual no post contact contact sexual favours in a pub the other night. And that's a serious story....

:shock:

What sort of pubs do you go into?

Rough ones when out with work unfortunately.

All was going well until I encountered The Dwarf. Initially there was The Dwarf and her friend. I was propositioned so trying to get out of it I asked if she shouldn't really be hang in' with her mate (you know, wing dwarfs and all that jazz). She said that her mate wasn't around anymore as she liked to pick up, and I quote, "random black men". I was then propositioned.

Naturally being the gentleman I am I decided to point out this proposition to several of my erstwhile work colleagues, one of which, bizarrely was a ridiculously drunk ridiculously hot blonde who stopped dancing with some bloke who called himself a boot neck (but blatantly wasn't) and came across to moan at me due to the fact that I wouldn't let her grind herself on me.

The night then went downhill and the wonderful girl I had fallen in love with (and she, bizarrely, with me) during this most recent time away no longer realises I exist. This I blame on another erstwhile work colleague going up to her and asking if she knew anything about The Dwarf. Cockblocking 101.

pinno

Boy, that ^ was cryptic.

'Boot neck' ? 'Cockblocking' ? So what is the acronym now - TD? ?

Matthewfalle

pinarello001 wrote:

Boy, that ^ was cryptic.

'Boot neck' ? 'Cockblocking' ? So what is the acronym now - TD? ?

Boot neck - Royal Marine Commando. Someone who wants to be airborne but isn't good enough.

Cockblocking - the art of blowing your mate's chance of having sexual favours with another person (same or other sex, we're all "don't ask don't tell" around here) through the art of stitching them up.

It's still TDV due to The Lost One having blanked me from her mind. TDLO? She was (and still is) sooooooo lovely.

veronese68

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth.

Clearly not. Has he ever had a lie in until 10? He's normally in the pub well before that.
Evening all. Pleasant day of not a whole lot, but I enjoyed it.

slowmart

pinarello001 wrote:

Boy, that ^ was cryptic.

'Boot neck' ? 'Cockblocking' ? So what is the acronym now - TD? ?

Poor strategy and even worse tactics. He'd have better off shagging the minging midget thereby avoiding work colleagues and walts and then going back to shag the blonde woman, who now has forgotten who he is.

So it looks like he stayed sober, missed a easy shag and didn't get further with the attractive blonde.

Probably exited the pub sober and only got his chops around a greasy burger

Matthewfalle

Slowmart wrote:

pinarello001 wrote:

Boy, that ^ was cryptic.

'Boot neck' ? 'Cockblocking' ? So what is the acronym now - TD? ?

Poor strategy and even worse tactics. He'd have better off shagging the minging midget thereby avoiding work colleagues and walts and then going back to shag the blonde woman, who now has forgotten who he is.

So it looks like he stayed sober, missed a easy shag and didn't get further with the attractive blonde.

Probably exited the pub sober and only got his chops around a greasy burger

Quite the opposite my earnest friend - left the pub hilariously squiffy, didn't catch the ebolaids from The Dwarf, blonde still loves me (saved in the bank for a later date) and I went home with a 21 year old paramedic (female) who, in addition to be delightful company, also bought me a kebab with extra chilli sauce. Which is always nice.

All appetites duly sated and still able to turn up at work on time the next morning looking the dapper gent I am.

So all round, a good result thank you very much.

tlw1

Veronese68 wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

I'm not Matth.

Clearly not. Has he ever had a lie in until 10? He's normally in the pub well before that.
Evening all. Pleasant day of not a whole lot, but I enjoyed it.

Correct, don't think I've ever been in bed beyond 9

Flâneur

Matthewfalle wrote:

pinarello001 wrote:

Boy, that ^ was cryptic.

'Boot neck' ? 'Cockblocking' ? So what is the acronym now - TD? ?

Boot neck - Royal Marine Commando. Someone who wants to be airborne but isn't good enough.
.

Who still has some sense not to jump out of a moving vehicle thousands of feet above the ground. Only people with less sense than regular airborne are the pathfinders.

Sounds like a solid adventure though, every good tale needs a dwarf.

Mine was dull, quick spin, some paper work, booked a weekend break without the dating girl then made food.

pinno

I geddit. Mattf is the fit, good looking one who gets a shag easy but they don't stick around 'cos he has the personality of a dish cloth.

Matthewfalle

pinarello001 wrote:

I geddit. Mattf is the fit, good looking one who gets a shag easy but they don't stick around 'cos he has the personality of a dish cloth.

Yo' momma said I had a great personality.