Advice for new dad on how to keep cycling!

kingofthetailwind

Another new dad here.

It's been said already but I'll say it again, earn your brownie points! Do half the night feeds, even if you have work in the morning. Encourage your wife to have time to herself etc.

For me, evening rides are impossible. So I get out at 6am before work on one or two weekdays. Means being knackered in work though! And I changed clubs to one that started earlier on a Saturday.

pinno

cubedean wrote:

Congratulations first and foremost.

We've just bought babies 3&4 home so my prediciment is similar but on a worse scale. My advice would be clear a couple of days in advance if you are doing a big ride & be prepared for your saddle time to take a knock.

Twins :shock:

Good luck.

frazered

Concur with most already said. Prepare yourself for little to no cycling during the 1st 6 months. You are there to support baby and mum. Cycling is possible but only negotiated well in advance and nowhere near the number of hours i used to out in. I am 5kg heavier now!

alex222

for me going out early has been key, so 7am in the summer. Does help that baby and wife both like their lie ins. Although I am worried about arrival of number 2 next year.

thescouselander

I was asking the same question nearly two years ago - it hasn't worked out for me. A lot will depend on the temperament of your little one and how well your Mrs is coping with motherhood. In my case we have a very active and challenging son who will drain the life out of anyone looking after him for more than a couple of hours. He doesn't sleep well either so both the wife and I are permanently knackered. Any spare time I have is usually spent relieving the wife of toddler duty so she can have a rest.

On the other hand I know plenty of people who seem to have an easier time and seem to have spare time to do things.

It's luck of the draw I suppose but one way I keep in the saddle is to ride to and from work and take the odd detour to increase the millage occasionally. There's no sneaking out early for me as our little one wakes at 5:30 anyway. I'm hoping that as our son gets older he'll be easier to handle and I can take up club riding.

Also all the best to for the birth!

sloppyschleckonds

thescouselander wrote:

In my case we have a very active and challenging son who will drain the life out of anyone looking after him for more than a couple of hours. He doesn't sleep well either so both the wife and I are permanently knackered. Any spare time I have is usually spent relieving the wife of toddler duty so she can have a rest.

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

thescouselander

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

thescouselander wrote:

In my case we have a very active and challenging son who will drain the life out of anyone looking after him for more than a couple of hours. He doesn't sleep well either so both the wife and I are permanently knackered. Any spare time I have is usually spent relieving the wife of toddler duty so she can have a rest.

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

Every day but in practise its a lot harder than it sounds; especially as I have very little spare time anyway.

Daz555

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

If you are not father then fair enough. You know no better. If you are a father then bloody hell - you should know better than to make a statement like that.

My two penneth here is simple - having a child transforms your life. If it did not, what would be the point in having a child?

I do less sport now than before I had kids. I don't care though - my kids will be grown up and gone before I know what's happened. I'd rather look back at these few years and being ok that I perhaps played less football or rode fewer miles than to look back wishing I'd spent more time with my children.

There is a lot of luck involved - along with the good parenting side of things. I have a mate for example who apart from when away for work or the rare weekend has not had a full nights sleep in almost 4 years. :shock: Cycling/sports is not really one of his top priorities. He can't blame the kids though - speaking to his mum, he himself did not manage to sleep a full night til he was 5!

I'm lucky. Very. My kids have slept through every night since they were 4 months old. I'm very thankful for that and it really does make everything a lot easier when it comes to planning stuff like sport or weekend trips with mates. If you and your partner are well rested everything is so much easier.

Bordersroadie

Well said, Daz555!

My two girls (two and coming up five) have rarely slept well and my wife's pregnancies were very tough, so I've had not far off six years of trying to fit in cycling in a busy family/work life and on less sleep than I ever used to get.

Lots of good advice above, earning brownie points and going out at times that least disrupt family responsibilities, like very early morning or late evening. Mostly I do the latter. Commuting is good too if you can fit it into your life plan, even just sometimes, as I can. Also, if you have to do fewer miles than you'd like, make them count.

I've managed to get to a good level of fitness with fewer miles by focusing on harder intensities and very hilly routes wherever possible. Off the back of this I still manage to do respectably in some pretty tough Sportives in UK and abroad and local club TTs (less respectable times!) so it can be done but you have to be dedicated (or obsessed, as my wife would put it!) and prepared to go out in all weathers. I have resorted to the turbo possibly three times a year.

Good luck to all Daddies for your 2015 training, I'm thinking of you!

Bozman

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

I do at the weekend. I'll look at the weather and pick the best day for cycling, it's always been that way so I don't get any grief. Your life doesn't stop when you have children it just changes slightly, there's no point I just sitting around at home twiddling your thumbs you might as well get out because when that baby grows up it's going to require a hell of a lot more attention, babies just sleep and eat.. Milk it while you can.

Bordersroadie

The other factor to mention, perhaps the most frustrating [he said, coughing up his lungs], is that kids are germ-magnets. I hardly ever used to get colds and viruses but now I do. Nothing you can really do about it other than wear a mask at home so we're a bit stuffed on that one really. Not great for the already time-crunched cyclist to have enforced time off, but c'est la vie.

However, as (most) parents say, in the bigger picture, all the hardships are worth it!

supermurph09

Bozman wrote:

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

I do at the weekend. I'll look at the weather and pick the best day for cycling, it's always been that way so I don't get any grief. Your life doesn't stop when you have children it just changes slightly, there's no point I just sitting around at home twiddling your thumbs you might as well get out because when that baby grows up it's going to require a hell of a lot more attention, babies just sleep and eat.. Milk it while you can.

You forgot cry, need constant attention and s h i t alot!! :shock:

Bozman

Supermurph09 wrote:

Bozman wrote:

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

I do at the weekend. I'll look at the weather and pick the best day for cycling, it's always been that way so I don't get any grief. Your life doesn't stop when you have children it just changes slightly, there's no point I just sitting around at home twiddling your thumbs you might as well get out because when that baby grows up it's going to require a hell of a lot more attention, babies just sleep and eat.. Milk it while you can.

You forgot cry, need constant attention and s h i t alot!! :shock:

The first child gets plenty of attention but the second time around you know how to play the system, babies know how to press the buttons and it's up to you to learn when you don't have to jump.
I can remember being shattered one night and our 8wk old started crying, we went through the usual - "your turn" ... "No it's your turn"... "Your turn"... We both fell back to sleep so no one got up and from that night our lad slept through the night.

alex222

Bordersroadie wrote:

The other factor to mention, perhaps the most frustrating [he said, coughing up his lungs], is that kids are germ-magnets. I hardly ever used to get colds and viruses but now I do. Nothing you can really do about it other than wear a mask at home so we're a bit stuffed on that one really. Not great for the already time-crunched cyclist to have enforced time off, but c'est la vie.

However, as (most) parents say, in the bigger picture, all the hardships are worth it!

Absolutely, have never been ill so regularly as I am now.

This is starting to get like a Mums Net forum (or what I assume a Mums Net forum is).

frazered

SloppySchleckonds wrote:

thescouselander wrote:

In my case we have a very active and challenging son who will drain the life out of anyone looking after him for more than a couple of hours. He doesn't sleep well either so both the wife and I are permanently knackered. Any spare time I have is usually spent relieving the wife of toddler duty so she can have a rest.

Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?

Perhaps you meant 'have you considered keeping your children in a cage in the cellar or packing them off to a gulag so you can ride more?'

That would be more realistic than what you suggest.

Our daughter slept like a champ until 4 months. Now she might do 6 hours or like last night 1 hour. The impact to your home life, working life and past times are pretty massive.

mikpem

As has been said, organisation is key and finding ways of getting on the bike that fit with family life.
My little one naps for 1-2 hours a couple of hours in the day, if we are home I will take one of these time slots to jump on the bike and see how far I can get.
We have friends/family 30,50 and 100 miles away, if we are not time restricted when visiting them I will do it on the bike and meet them there.
From about 7 months old my little one was ok to go on the back of the bike and he loves it so much we have to go out at least once a week (this might open up the opportunity for you to get yourself a new 'family bike').
My 'family bike' just so happened to also be a cyclocross bike. I took off the rack and seat one weekend to give a face a go and now I'm hooked. The advantage being that cyclocross is quite family orientated and friendly so the Mrs and little one can come along, watch the race, play in the mud, eat cake and watch me in pain and it only lasts an hour.
This year we are travelling 500 miles to Scotland to see family. We have split the route into 5 days with an activity to do at each point and I will be cycling to each point with a mate whilst the Mrs and her friend (his partner) will be driving up in parallel and doing each of the activities.
The only downside I have found is that my lad is now obsessed with bikes.... I got in from work last night and spent half an hour pushing him around the garden on a bike that's too big for him (I wish he could have had his balance bike a couple of days early) and he still had a big grump on when his bike had to go away.

mugensi

I have two girls, 4 and 2yrs and its actually not that bad. For the first few weeks you may as well forget about it as things will be a little up in the air as both of you come to terms with having this new little person living with you and relying on you both for everything but as things fall into place and especially when the baby is very young and sleeps a lot, take your opportunities to head out for an hour or two. At present both mine go to bed at approx 7:30 and I'm ready to go once theyre ready for bed (in summer/brighter months) In winter, I always manage an hour or two either saturday or sunday and I have a turbo trainer in the garage which can be used pretty much any time the weather doesnt allow me to go outdoors to cycle, especially during the winter during the week when its after 5:30pm before i get home and already dark.

alex222

I even managed a ride on the morning after the birth of my baby. Visitors weren't allowed into hospital until 9am so I thought great chance to head out for a quick ride beforehand.
Just looking back on Strava now and I was very lucky in that I managed to get a fair few rides in whilst on my 2 weeks of paternity leave (just 1.5 hour rides though) and the weekends after. Not really sure how I got away with it.
I assume with one child it is a lot easier, I don't think things will be so simple with number 2.

Hawmaw

I just caught up with this and had a wee chuckle reading all the posts. I've got 2 girls aged 16 and 14 and a 12 year old boy. Believe me , it doesn't get any easier.
Oldest girl coaches and participates in gymnastics being part of a succesful local club. 14 year old is a Scottish champion gymnast and a member of the Scotland squad. She is also a member of the same club as her sister.
My boy is training for his 1st dan at karate and is also a member of the local basketball club.
So my opportunities for cycling are few. Luckilly I work shifts and have days of during the week or I'd never get out.
I've lost count of the weekend rides I've had to cancel and I can't even think about entering Sportives or similar events. I'm currently working on getting the green light for the Selkirk MTB marathon on 2nd May but this is also the date of Scottish Gymfest probably the biggest display gymnastics event north of the border so I'm on a hiding to nothing !
Parenthood is great but if you get your kids involved in sports and activities be prepared to make big sacrifices in time and money !

pinno

Bordersroadie wrote:

The other factor to mention, perhaps the most frustrating [he said, coughing up his lungs], is that kids are germ-magnets. I hardly ever used to get colds and viruses but now I do. Nothing you can really do about it other than wear a mask at home so we're a bit stuffed on that one really. Not great for the already time-crunched cyclist to have enforced time off, but c'est la vie.

However, as (most) parents say, in the bigger picture, all the hardships are worth it!

Yeah, my first born started nursery in April and she brings all the bugs back for daddy to try out. Add the fact that I am immuno compromised...

I cut down my hours as soon as No1 came along. Although I don't earn much, I have a much better work/life/home/cycling balance.
When August 2015 comes, Thing 2 will be at nursery too so that will give me 2 extra mornings a week to go out on my bike. Wahey (or double the bugs).

Diamant49

Hawmaw wrote:

I just caught up with this and had a wee chuckle reading all the posts. I've got 2 girls aged 16 and 14 and a 12 year old boy. Believe me , it doesn't get any easier.

This! I have only one, soon to be 11 - so far every stage has been more fun, but more demanding in its own way (and the teens still have to arrive!). Mine is big into horse riding - but also swimming, gymnastics and now photography (I have to do a 10 week course with her in January, as its the only way she was allowed to do it :roll: ). At the moment Mrs Diamant has also taken up horse riding, which gives me a lot of free passes at the weekends - but we are now talking about buying into some dog-meat futures, so this free time could vanish :evil: .

The main things I have learnt is to grab every opportunity, to plan ahead as far as possible (but don't assume it will work out) and to ride at times when the others are busy or asleep. Fortunately I prefer training early in the morning, before the others are up - for the winter learning to "love" indoor training is a must.

All said though, its great!

okgo

Surely commuting is the answer? You still have to get to work, tac a bit on each way and you could realistically get in some good miles?

If and when I have kids I will likely still commute and then adapt at weekends for other rides and races etc. If you want to make it work then I'm sure you can, two club members I know (who post on here) still managed to get out and ride by one going out and then tag teaming with the other, and having a trailer. I suspect half the issue is having a partner that also has sporting hobbies. Mine will want to run as much as I will want to ride so can't see an issue with the tag team option.

cyclingsheep

If you want some early resistance training can I suggest a Croozer trailer? We got one when our eldest was 6months but should have gotten it earlier. They sell a baby cradle for them so you don't have to worry about the babies neck strength as they're laying down. Neither of my girls were good sleepers but put them in the Croozer and they slept like....well babies. It was the only place I could guarantee my first born would sleep. I also used to have the turbo set up outside the nursery so as soon as she was down I'd be on it, some workouts were only 30mins, others longer but generally averaged 45mins. I managed to train for the 2012 Etape du Tour just doing that and the occasional weekend ride and got through 120 hilly miles fine. Good luck, in the end you really need a partner who is willing to compromise with you and for you to do the same for her and you can still get on the bike.

jibberjim

okgo wrote:

Surely commuting is the answer? You still have to get to work, tac a bit on each way and you could realistically get in some good miles?

But tacking a bit on the ends of when you're away is the crap way of doing it... it means the total length of time one person has to look after the baby is longer than necessary, it means you probably won't see the baby much either once they have the sense of day / night sleeping/waking, I'd say it's pretty rubbish.

I think whoever said "Have you considered bringing up your child to fit around you life?" has been given an unfairly hard time, it is a pretty important point that the parents lives do need to have a semblance of themselves, everyone needs a life of their own. The child should not be all consuming in the family, they're a member of it, not it. They need their needs taken care of, but so do all the other members, and exercise should also be a requirement, you do not do your child a service by being so unfit that you die young, or are obese or ... But even separate from that time to do what you enjoy is important.

The times you get free will depend on the rest of your family, getting up early would not have worked for us at all - it was about the only time anyone had a chance to sleep so someone sleeping, someone looking after the baby was right and I have 3.5 year old daughter who has pretty much never slept through the night, but it works for others. Until you know your baby and your partner and when they're free to do stuff, just make the time, and make sure your partner has the time too.

pinno

I think the OP has bolted...