'D' Lock advice, help wanted

See, I woz finking of going back to skool innit 'cos i'm so fick like but wot gets me is that i 'ave 'erd that people do nick yer dustcaps and let yer tyres down.
I 'ave decided to defend my bike wiv a D lock but it raises a number of questions like innit:
How many times can I bash some cnut over the head wiv a D lock before it faws to bits?
Can the rozers te from an imprint in someone's coconut that A) It was a D lock wot dunnit and
It woz my D lock wot dunnit?
I wish life wozn't so complicay id.
I 'ave decided to defend my bike wiv a D lock but it raises a number of questions like innit:
How many times can I bash some cnut over the head wiv a D lock before it faws to bits?
Can the rozers te from an imprint in someone's coconut that A) It was a D lock wot dunnit and

I wish life wozn't so complicay id.
seanoconn - gruagach craic!
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Raleigh Mirage (Commuter)
And I think you'll find the bestest pictures on teh interwebs EvAr are these 2:
Pina, is this one you?
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F*cking Fast 29er
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Raleigh Mirage (Commuter)
Standard roadie grammar. About what you would expect from someone who can only manage the skills to ride on smooth, grippy surfaces.
Fark off you, we've all had your mum.
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Here's a picture of my partner, she's been on a diet of 'seefood' - whenever she sees food, she eats it. She likes bikes too.
Nah, it's just so clicky in here.
At least someone is posting in here
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"I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]
As I said, we've all had GTArrowheads mum. Even the leg shaving blood swappers are at it now.
She looks like she likes bikes, I bet she could eat a whole one too.
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she doesn't like bikes - someone's just parked it there!
He's been missing us over in Bottom Bracket so he came here looking for you :P
seanoconn
In spite of all that though, you still can't shred the gnar like us rad dudes, feeding off each other, sick!
Right, I'm off to go drive 8 hours so I can smash 5 cans of Monster, eat some burgers and throw myself and my bike off a cliff whilst dressed as a power ranger for 30 minutes.
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Just don't fall on top of Yellow Peril - he's a decent 3-legged roadie.
BTW - roadies like shaved legs:
censored me Pina, is that your mum :shock:
I'd take her up the dirt track :twisted:
seanoconn
+1
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Raleigh Mirage (Commuter)
That was after I used your Mum's trap door by the way :twisted:
seanoconn
You wouldn't know what to do with her. And no, showing her your Pokemon collection does not count.
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Thats what you think. Just ask your mum, she will tell you
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Raleigh Mirage (Commuter)
She can't, she is still laughing