Cr4p Jobs

bg13

Saw some chaps emptying a row of porta loos today, the smell was horrendous and they really didn't look like they were enjoying it!

Made me chuckle!

What is your/the sh1ttest job that you have done/seen/heard of?

welshkev

I worked in a factory that made toothbrushes one summer after leaving school. 10 hours of packing brushes into trays!!!
I just make sure I wash my new tooth brush thoroughly now :shock:

I also did some filming in the pot noodle factory. That job was fine, but after seeing what falls in them on the production line, I'll never eat a pot noodle again!!

clamps81

Cake factory.
Laugh it up - it was bloody terrible. Working on a building site comes a close second, but I only did that for a couple of months total and it was mostly due to the terrible weather meaning that my extremities went numb after only a few minutes made things a nightmare.

Nine months in cake factory was dire though - I did while I was in my final year of A-levels/summer and it was horrendous. Production lines, packing rooms, mixing rooms - the lot. Stunning levels of boredom, wall to wall arseholes and non-stop radio 1 for the duration of your shift. Hateful Nearly got fired on more than one occasion for rolling up too drunk/hungover to work properly. It wasn't massively hard - it was the tedium and that did me in. Hauling bundles of Cat 5 through rat infested crawl spaces beneath a school and into/over/through whatever other spaces the others couldn't get in for the following few summers (and for a good few months after uni) was in comparison, a bundle of laughs.

Had it pretty easy otherwise though - although doing customer facing stuff has only heightened my already stratospheric levels of distaste towards the rest of humanity. Also worked for a well known commercial broadcaster and their continued misfortune is music to my ears having dealt with the entitlement complexes of far too many of their staff. Now, I always assume people who work in telly are bellends until proven otherwise.

With all that said, I'll take a cushty number in an office over working outside in the excuse for a climate that we've got. I am not a hardy outdoors type by any stretch and I will hold up my hands and admit that.

bennett_346

welshkev wrote:

I also did some filming in the pot noodle factory. That job was fine, but after seeing what falls in them on the production line, I'll never eat a pot noodle again!!

:?:

cat_with_no_tail

Outbound sales call-centre for a large offshore bank.

I cannot describe just how horrible it was.

Everything was scripted, it was just a never ending, monotonous trudge through micromanagement.
They run them (or at least they did) like bIoody gulags.
Any free thought was actively discouraged, you had to just turn of your brain and wait for 5pm to come round.
They even had the semi-communist motivational pictures on the walls.

*shudders*

clamps81

Oh gods.. I managed three hours in an outbound sales call centre. Flat out couldn't do it.

thekickingmule

All the jobs I've worked have been ok to be honest. By far the best was working in a toy shop. "Mule, we want you to demonstrate to the kids this latest lego toy" "Bring it on!!" 8)

Worst job I've witnessed, is the same as bg13. At Glastonbury, the blokes that emptied the portaloos every morning, poor b4st4rds must have had smelling salts glued inside their nostrels. I know it was bad, because I was in the queue waiting to use the portaloos. By far it was the best time to go!

Gazlar

I used to work as assistant manager of a toy shop....hated it.
Then i worked for the nhs doing circumcisions until i went to work one day without my contact lenses in and got the sack

Clank

Helping pigs breed.

What has been smelled, cannot be unsmelled.

cat_with_no_tail

Clank wrote:

Helping pigs breed..

What? like a professional pig "fluffer"?

You sick b@stard.








Where do I sign?

thekickingmule

Clank wrote:

Helping pigs breed.

Surely, this means there is more bacons.

For that sir, I applaud you

Clank

thekickingmule wrote:

Clank wrote:

Helping pigs breed.

Surely, this means there is more bacons.

B****r me, I guess it does! Cool!

However, I will add, there ain't any flashbacks quite as disturbing as pigs banjo-gravy flashbacks.

<shudder>

levolon

stainless steel polishing job i did to help a mate out ..
he had the bull bar contract for land rover and there was several hundred a week to get polished upto a mirror finish ..

now it was ok as i like hands on but i was having to clean my fookin eye lids with cotton wool buds as i looked like a boy george 80's pop star lookalike with mascara etc , the filthiest job ever and noisy too..

tlw1

fluffer

cat_with_no_tail

matthew h wrote:

Pig fluffer

Working with Clank were ya?

thekickingmule

lon 456 wrote:

polishing job i did to help a mate out as i looked like a boy george 80's pop star lookalike with mascara etc , the filthiest job ever and noisy too..

Dude. Way too much info!

tlw1

Cat With No Tail wrote:

matthew h wrote:

fluffer

Working with Clank were ya?

sorry, spelling mistake, meant buffer doing a polishing job with lon 456

rgliniany

worked at a wastewater treatment plant..... where all the portaloo suckers unload their suckings....... worst bit was where one of the holding tanks sprung a leak round the top...... looked like a pot of gravy bubbling over the lid... quite gross..... slightly worse was walking past the aeration tanks in the middle of summer..... 40 degrees a smell only comparable to chicken poop..... and seeing the brown froth of aerated tom kites took a strong constitution.... vicks vaporub in the nostrils was a must

levolon

thekickingmule wrote:

lon 456 wrote:

polishing job i did to help a mate out as i looked like a boy george 80's pop star lookalike with mascara etc , the filthiest job ever and noisy too..

Dude. Way too much info!

when you put it like that!!

Motley13

Working in a supermarket. It is just a plain cr4p job, people treat you like cr4p, managers treat you like cr4p, under staffed, boring as hell, everything is cr4p. Never knew how weird and wonderful the general public were till i got my job, for example someone actually took a dump in the store the other week :shock: . Can not wait to get out of there now

Stevo_666

Cat With No Tail wrote:

Clank wrote:

Helping pigs breed..

What? like a professional pig "fluffer"?

You sick b@stard.








Where do I sign?

I've heard that being the jizz mopper in a strip joint isn't the best job around...

welshkev

bennett_346 wrote:

welshkev wrote:

I also did some filming in the pot noodle factory. That job was fine, but after seeing what falls in them on the production line, I'll never eat a pot noodle again!!

:?:

nothing like cockroaches or anything. but basically the dries pot noodle moves along the production line and there's bits of old, dried pot noodle hanging around the place, it drops in to the existing stuff and off it goes to be packed and then eaten. how long as that stuff been hanging around before it drops into the stuff going off to be packed?

thekickingmule

Motley13 wrote:

Working in a supermarket.

Really? I loved working in a supermarket! Got to talk with random people and have a laugh, got to argue with stupid customers, and at the end of the day, you finished work, didn't take anything home with you or have to worry about it. You didn't have to think too far in advance, as you don't have particular projects like in other jobs.

That said, I was a butcher at the local supermarkets, so it was more like a butchers job than stacking shelves, but even when I did that, I don't think it's the worst job, by far!

VWsurfbum

I was a Estate agent once for 3 months, my first attempt to get out the motor trade.
The job itself was easy (as we all know) it was the other estate agents and managers. I had a proper falling down moment in one of the morning "big yourself up" meetings, you know all those people who think they know everything, and yet know nothing, well thats where they all go to work.
Simple things they just couldnt understand. Proper wound me up, plus you could never tell people what you did for a living.

ol\'gregg

I worked in a factory that produced dvds for all the major outlets and spent 12 hours a day loading dvds into a machine to be tested then put them back in a box.
I also did 3 months putting the tops on silly string bottles. That got very dull very quickly.

I also worked with Welshkev when i was 19 at a video production company. The job was good but he was a right C**t

welshkev

ol\'gregg wrote:

I also worked with Welshkev when i was 19 at a video production company. The job was good but he was a right C**t

hello

ol\'gregg

Just kidding bro Not really

Motley13

thekickingmule wrote:

Motley13 wrote:

Working in a supermarket.

Really? I loved working in a supermarket! Got to talk with random people and have a laugh, got to argue with stupid customers, and at the end of the day, you finished work, didn't take anything home with you or have to worry about it. You didn't have to think too far in advance, as you don't have particular projects like in other jobs.

That said, I was a butcher at the local supermarkets, so it was more like a butchers job than stacking shelves, but even when I did that, I don't think it's the worst job, by far!

I think the thing that makes it bad for me is where my store is, its right in the middle of where all the lovely lovely people of the area live (as in all the pikeys and chavs who think they rule the place) and the fact we are so understaffed its stupid but they wont hire at all as it means spending more money :x

pesky_jones

I've always had good jobs, nothing to moan about. I will however nominate jizz mopper in a strip club as the worst so far.

Thewaylander

Used to work cleaning planes between flights at Cardiff Airport.

All i can say is holiday makers are a disgusting bunch of mongs leaving full sick bags in the back of seats and all sorts.. bunch of dirty Barstewards.

pesky_jones

Thewaylander wrote:

All i can say is holiday makers are a disgusting bunch of mongs leaving full sick bags in the back of seats and all sorts.. bunch of dirty Barstewards.

Like Jebus? He made a few holidays I think