Are roadies the worst breed of cyclists around?

Gabbo Posts: 864
edited April 2013 in Road general
Hey - before anyone tries to shoot me down, just remember it's not my opinion (though I do agree in part with what he says) :mrgreen:
The negative view of the Roadie is that he or she is fastidious, snotty and aloof. On the other hand, the romantic view is that Roadies are the toughest of all cyclists and that their careful preparation and studied appearance is a natural expression of this mental and physical toughness. But there's a deeper truth. Beneath all the training and suffering and Lycra and embrocations, the fact is that all Roadies are freeloading cheats. I'm not talking about doping. No, Roadies are freeloading cheats because the true essence of road cycling is the conservation of energy. Naturally, the only way a bicycle is going to move is if a person puts energy into it and they do what they can to make their bodies strong, but there the effort ends. Beyond this, everything else is based on not making an effort. It's based on making things as light and aerodynamic as possible; it's based on slipstreaming behind other riders for as long as possible and it's about expending as little effort as effectively as possible.

And the Roadie's freeloading ways extend to life off the bike as well. Anybody who's spent any time in bike shops knows the Roadie is the worst kind of product-grubbing discount hunter there is. They have no loyalty to their shop; if they can find it online for £2 less, they'll buy it there. Yet they'll spend £1,000 on a wheel set if they think it might give them an edge, and if you lend them the money for it don't expect to get it back. Roadies are the junkies of the cycling world; they're skinny and untrustworthy, and they'll do whatever they need to in order to keep their habit going. The Roadie's life is full of disappointed people – spouses, friends, family – all of whom have involuntarily funded their depraved lifestyle in one way or another.

Why other cyclists don't like them: They don't appear to enjoy what they're doing and they don't appear to know you exist.

Compatibility with other cyclists: Have been seen at mountain-bike races, but are largely compatible only with their own kind. - Eben Weiss

Read more: ... ing-tribes


  • Zoomer37
    Zoomer37 Posts: 725
    Bless him. What a moron
  • pride4ever
    pride4ever Posts: 510
    LOL......he,s having a laugh of course but its funny. There is some truth but generalization is generalization whichever way you cut it. Anyone who has raced will tell you that the effort is so encompassing, so brutal, so completely shattering that anything that helps get you through is worth its weight In gold. No other form of cycling can compare with that. As for spending habits, well everyone's looking for a deal, its not purely the reserve of roadies. Made me laugh so nice find OP.
    the deeper the section the deeper the pleasure.
  • 16mm
    16mm Posts: 545
    Bike Snob is spot on, and probably slags every other type of cyclist in the same way. Isn't he an ex roadie?
  • iPete
    iPete Posts: 6,076
    Fair and to be treated like the rules..
  • andi1363
    andi1363 Posts: 350
    Think the answer is commuters who want you to share their opinion!
  • Gabbo
    Gabbo Posts: 864
    16mm wrote:
    Bike Snob is spot on, and probably slags every other type of cyclist in the same way. Isn't he an ex roadie?

    I'm not entirely sure. Judge for yourself by this picture of him below


    He tends not to slag of MTB'ers in the same way. Read more - ... ing-tribes
  • Latte sipping w@nkers
    I'm sorry you don't believe in miracles
  • verylonglegs
    verylonglegs Posts: 3,954
    I blame the need to generate revenue through advertising for these sort of articles, journalists/coloumnists are having to write more and more trash and nonsense in a effort to get noticed since the internet opened up 'publishing' to anyone.
  • bernithebiker
    bernithebiker Posts: 4,148
    When a skinny roadie on a nice lightweight bike creams past you on the Alpe d'Huez, it's human nature to hope his carbon spokes collapse and he faceplants the tarmac....... :D
  • thegreatdivide
    thegreatdivide Posts: 5,803
    Hehe - that article is an old one. My mum cut it out and gave it to me a few years back :lol:

    To be taken with a [small] pinch of salt ;-)
  • Bozman
    Bozman Posts: 2,518
    Can't argue with that
  • dmclite-3.0
    dmclite-3.0 Posts: 845
    I am heaping disdain, so vulgar to talk about it daaahlings. :P
    I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, but I'm intercontinental when I eat French toast...
  • Saw this earlier at work and thought I should say something.

    Put the bike away at home but walked past a mirror....been there 'til now.

    Ciao, darlinks.
    Ecrasez l’infame