Start the weekend with a joke

Peddle Up!
Peddle Up! Posts: 2,040
edited December 2012 in The cake stop
As nobody has been hurt I thought this topic might take some gentle ribbing (see what I did there? :) )

In Northamptonshire a lorry shed its load of animal carcasses across the southbound carriageway, between junctions 15A and 16.

I guess commuters should expect a choppy journey home. :roll:

Your turn...
Purveyor of "up" :)

Comments

  • jermas
    jermas Posts: 484
    That's an offal joke !!!
  • bianchimoon
    bianchimoon Posts: 3,942
    you think he'd have loined by now!
    All lies and jest..still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest....
  • pb21
    pb21 Posts: 2,171
    Tricky to avoid driving in the hard shoulder there.
    Mañana
  • Redhog14
    Redhog14 Posts: 1,377
    I imagine the insurance claim will be quite large, with a big form; it'll take some time to fillet in!
  • jermas
    jermas Posts: 484
    Apparently the lorry driver was a homosexual. He was seen mincing around the scene of the accident.
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    Early police reports say it was caused when the lorry t-boned another vehicle.
  • jermas
    jermas Posts: 484
    I thought the accident occurred because he was carved up.
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    It appears that the lorry driver has previous, one of the first officers on the scene asked "have I sinew before?"
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    Crash Scene Investigators are currently taking stock of the incident and say it should make a lovely gravy for Sunday.
  • jermas
    jermas Posts: 484
    Drink driving was thought to be involved. The officer described the driver as being slaughtered.
  • nevman
    nevman Posts: 1,611
    Highways Agency were late on the scene and are now feeling sheepish.
    Whats the solution? Just pedal faster you baby.

    Summer B,man Team Carbon LE#222
    Winter Alan Top Cross
    All rounder Spec. Allez.
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    nevman wrote:
    Highways Agency were late on the scene and are now feeling sheepish.

    That's baaaad.
  • jermas
    jermas Posts: 484
    The driver has been given a right grilling by his boss. He said "I've got a bone to pick with you. One more mistake and you're for the chop".
  • Was there an hambulance on the scene ?

    :roll:
    All the gear, but no idea...
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 52,501
    I bet the lorry driver will get butchered by the law and his employer.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • nevman
    nevman Posts: 1,611
    the driver fled the scene and has gone into hiding.
    Whats the solution? Just pedal faster you baby.

    Summer B,man Team Carbon LE#222
    Winter Alan Top Cross
    All rounder Spec. Allez.
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    No his boss actually said 'al halal you one more chance'
  • I've written a poem about it

    "I buried the animal is a 6 foot hole
    My dad buried it in a twelve foot hole
    My brother buried it in a 20 foot hole
    My mate buried it in a 50 foot hole"


    Ok its not very good.....but it's deep. :D
    The dissenter is every human being at those moments of his life when he resigns
    momentarily from the herd and thinks for himself.
  • Some offal jokes here, oh heck that was done before, now I'm in a stew.
  • CrunchyToes
    CrunchyToes Posts: 2
    edited February 2016
    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
  • crom7
    crom7 Posts: 83
    Just been offered 8 legs of venison that fell off the back of a lorry for £45..........is that too dear?
  • cornerblock
    cornerblock Posts: 3,228
    crom7 wrote:
    Just been offered 8 legs of venison that fell off the back of a lorry for £45..........is that too dear?

    No it's two deer.
  • The driver has been quoted as saying it was "all a big mis-steak"...

    Have I wandered into the Contador thread? :D