Why can men be so stupid?

stannie

Aagghhh!
My hubby and I have decided to get fitter. I have a replacement knee so I dont really find walking/running very comfortable so he agreed to go cycling with me.
I am not fast but I used to do some cycling and it is something I enjoy.

I persuaded him to buy a nice shiny Specialized Sirrus Sport and off we go.

First of all he wants to wear his pants under his cycling shorts with his trackie bottoms on top. No amount of complaining/explaining/begging will persuade him otherwise.
Then he wants to ride everywhere in a fairly big gear - he cannot keep a steady cadence and sprints for a few metres, freewheels then pushes hard again. i havent got a problem with this if it is how he wants to ride but it means we do not ride together because he starts pushing hard away from me then 20 metres down the road he falls behind. it also tires him out much quicker. And there are lots of hills where we live so it makes it more difficult to get up them.

the end result of our cycling experience is:

a) he tires himself out so quickly he can only last a couple of miles.

b) his man bits hurt big time and he can hardly sit down for 24 hours without whining like a baby.

c) he doesn't enjoy the bike ride and he hates cycling and doesn't want to go out a bike ever again.


Oh well - it looks like I will get a few hours peace and quiet whenever I decide to go out on my bike unless anyone has got any ideas how to help him to enjoy the bike.

PS anyone want to buy a virtually unused hybrid

chrisaonabike

Being one, I apologise on behalf of stupid men everywhere

Bustacapp

Tell him to grow a pair and MTFU!!

peat

Haha. Berk.

Perhaps he needs to hear it from a man for him to take it onboard?

zx6man

All of those will disappear after a few weeks into it. However,if he also tucks his trackie bottoms into his socks, then unfortunately he is a lost cause...

danowat

zx6man wrote:

However,if he also tucks his trackie bottoms into his socks, then unfortunately he is a lost cause...

Ain't that the truth

Bustacapp

zx6man wrote:

All of those will disappear after a few weeks into it. However,if he also tucks his trackie bottoms into his socks, then unfortunately he is a lost cause...

I do that.

elderone

most women moan about men not keeping up or lasting long in the sack,so on a bike is new to me..
but on a serious note,if he dont like cycling then he dont like cycling..tell him youv,e found a chap to ride with instead and he will be kitted up proper and cycling with you then...its a man thing.

CiB

singletrackanne wrote:

...stuff..., then...
PS anyone want to buy a virtually unused hybrid

There's your problem love. You should have got him a proper bike.

StorckSpeed

OK - you've got a new knee so I'm guessing your a MAWIL.....
Surely a man prematurely peaking is not a new development for you......
You need to gently caress and stroke his ........EGO.
Explain that he has phenomenal power output, far beyond that which someone of his age should have. But that he wants to use his power in one short burst. If only he could learn to pace himself and gradually use up his power he could be a fantastic cyclist. Slow and steady is the answer.
Failing that go for a younger model who'll stroke your .....EGO.

Wacky Racer

I think you are expecting too much, too soon!

Being a man isn't the problem, being a non-cyclist is!

My wife used to take the mickey out of me, off cycling, wearing tight fitting lycra, she almost wet herself when she first saw me putting on bib shorts. It took a year of me going out alone for her to decide perhaps she would like a bike. I took her down to Leisure Lakes at Cheltenham and bought her a Cube Peloton, her choice, but it was a really good fit. She refused SPD's, and was quite firm about what she would and wouldn't wear. She started off wearing an old pair of my MTB baggy shorts and an old running top.

Like your other half, she rode constantly in the wrong gear, she could barely manage a small hill, and I spent every ride waiting for her, usually at the top of hills. However, slowly but surely, she improved her riding skills, and saw the sense in wearing appropriate clothing. She even has SPD's now.

It has taken all this year, but she now pretty much keeps up with me, and we enjoy getting out together. I added a cafe stop to the rides which she enjoyed, and us going out together is a pleasure, no longer a chore. But, my point being that it took almost a year.

Give the guy some encouragement, lower your expectations, and ride alongside him, even when he is in the wrong gear. Show him some you-tube clips which might help him, teach him without him feeling like your teaching him. Book yourselves on a sportive for next year, to give him a goal to aim for.

kayo74

Needs to man up!!

t4tomo

you either need to upgrade him or go for m+1

EdgarAllenPoe

Please refer him to rule #5 if he continues in this unsightly manner.

http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/

Mikey23

i love this post!

stannie

Mikey23 wrote:

i love this post!

So do I
Thanks for all the posts chaps.
Yes I am a MAWIL. And my husband is a MAMITAU (Middle aged man in trackers and undies) I will try to get him out on the bike again, but I fear it a lost cause.
In the meantime as he sees me getting thinner and fitter because of the cycling, he may realise it is a good idea.

stannie

EdgarAllenPoe wrote:

Please refer him to rule #5 if he continues in this unsightly manner.

http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/

Ha! I like this.

JayKay3000

Some people... Sounds like he needs a good slap.

Buy him a mtn bike and send him out in the mud to man up. It's normally the women who like to ride in the harder gear, but that is funny.

It's cool when you find your body being able to do 30 mile trips and still feel like you can do another 30. 70 - 100 miles is tougher though.

When you get fitter cycle touring might be an option in UK or overseas.

mustgettaller

singletrackanne wrote:

Mikey23 wrote:

i love this post!

So do I
Thanks for all the posts chaps.
Yes I am a MAWIL. And my husband is a MAMITAU (Middle aged man in trackers and undies) I will try to get him out on the bike again, but I fear it a lost cause.
In the meantime as he sees me getting thinner and fitter because of the cycling, he may realise it is a good idea.

My wife has now started road biking. She had very little weight to lose to start with - but now there's no chance of me sprinting off ahead of her, because I prefer to draft her and admire the view! That's a compliment (and I believe I'm allowed to admire my own wife's backside) before you accuse me of being sexist!

rubyrider

I'd agree with Wacky Racer, you need to 'manage' his introduction to cycling if you are fitter and more experienced, and it does take a while to get used to being in the saddle.

My husband has been great with me as a beginner, because mostly he cycles behind me. He doesn't leave me lagging behind, I set the pace. Mentally this is much easier to handle. If it's windy, he will cycle ahead of me and I will try and stay close behind, but he keeps his speed in check.

It needs to be enjoyable and it doesn't sound like it is for your husband at the moment, especially if he feels he's failing.

Perhaps you could encourage him to go out on his own some of the time and then try and be gentle on him when you're together until he's fitter?

I have found my cadence has improved with owning a road bike as opposed to my MTB.

Good luck with getting him interested. It must be worth persevering!

napoleond

Singletrackanne- get some pics of your Waterford up on the your road bikes forum!

giant_man

Two things singletrackanne:

1. go out without him, he's only slowing you down
2. get a better husband, this one sounds a bit $hit .....

jane90

May I suggest a slightly different approach? Perhaps if your husband were to form the idea that you've met a very agreeable fellow enthusiast out on the highways and byways and that although your preference of course would be to cycle in the company of your beloved, well, you don't want to pressure him into doing something that he doesn't want to do so you'll have to make the best of cycling with this other amusing, witty, enthusiastic man who's always considerate enough to ride at your pace.

alfablue

Try positive reinforcement. My g/f started riding with me 4 years ago. First few rides she did the gears thing, and couldn't handle even a slight slope. I was very patient, I had to ride slow for over a year. I tried to make it as enjoyable as possible, and all rides had a tea and cake stop (the reward). Even if we went somewhere without facilities, I would take a mini stove and tea and cake in a pannier. 8000 miles later and several European cycle tours and uk sportives, she can beat me up the hills and match my sportive times (she is 10 years younger than me, in my defence :oops: ) wears Assos, and likes shopping for bike stuff . Also she commutes 14 miles a day in all weathers.

What about making a pub visit as part of your rides (it would work for me).

StorckSpeed

Alfablue - you make me sick.....
rides a bike '10 years younger, wears Assos, likes shopping for bike stuff and commutes'.
Thought this sort of thing only happened in movies or Readers Wives.....
Well Jel... :-D

alfablue

StorckSpeed wrote:

Alfablue - you make me sick.....
rides a bike '10 years younger, wears Assos, likes shopping for bike stuff and commutes'.
Thought this sort of thing only happened in movies or Readers Wives.....
Well Jel... :-D

8)

stannie

NapoleonD wrote:

Singletrackanne- get some pics of your Waterford up on the your road bikes forum!

I will try but it is in storage at the moment, so I have no white garage door to photograph it against

stannie

Jane90 and alfablue - both very good ideas. I will give them a try.

giant man - he is not that bad really - he lets me spend all the money I want on bikes and bits, and buys me lots of handbags and shoes. A woman can't ask for much more.

t4tomo

alfablue wrote:

StorckSpeed wrote:

Alfablue - you make me sick.....
rides a bike '10 years younger, wears Assos, likes shopping for bike stuff and commutes'.
Thought this sort of thing only happened in movies or Readers Wives.....
Well Jel... :-D

8)

what alfablue hasn't told youStorkspeed is that he's 84.

Joking aside, I have the problem that my Mrs won't ride with me as I would have to be stopped waiting all the time. We bought a cheap tandem so for the times she fancies a ride out,or the odd charity rides etc we go on that. Added advantages(or disadvantage) is that its much easier to chat on a tandem than two singles.

Mikey23

Because like all men he is stubborn, opinionated, competitive and doesn't need to read the flipping manual

Like when a new electrical device or DIY item arrives in the home. Or when finding directions on holiday.

A pity a valuable and potentially life changing shared activity is on the back burner though ...

StorckSpeed

t4tomo wrote:

what alfablue hasn't told youStorkspeed is that he's 84.