Things that kids should be taught

asprilla

rhext wrote:

Did you know that the Great Wall of China has catflaps at 1 mile intervals along its entire length.

The Great Wall of Korea has something similar.

CiB

How to cook and generally look after themselves.

How to keep a room tidy (may be preceded with clear guidance on what constitutes a tidy bedroom)

How to fight, and how to know when to fight and when to win a fight by a good hundred yards.

How to drive a tractor

How to show a dog who's boss (and cattle, but that's easier)

How to tease a cat quite mercilessly, when their mother isn't looking.

How imperial measurements still have a place at the top table and aren't some arcane ritual for old fogeys and it's not for nothing that that therrre Lunnon is a good 60-odd miles away not some implausible number of kilometres..

How apostrophes work; how plurals work even if the word ends with a vowel; how personal pronouns work; how for all the fact that the half-wits & idiots that we encounter daily can't manage it the English language is a pretty simple concept that just has a few exceptions to the norm.

How to climb a tree.

How a database works. How to install an OS. How to use a programming language in order to tell their teachers that IT isn't being familiar with fill-drag in Excel or formatting a title in Word. How Windows isn't the only OS around.

How to treat women properly with enough respect but not fawning obsequiousness.

How to know when no means no, and when it doesn't.

How to budget properly.

How to respect yer elders boy when you're instructed to do something, no matter if you didn't put it there in the first place.

I could go on. Oh - I have.

rjsterry

To have an inquiring and sceptical mind.

tailwindhome

To read books for enjoyment.

To stick up for the kid who's being picked on and speak up if it's them.

dhope

rhext wrote:

Personally, I like to teach them as much made-up stuff as I can reasonably get away with.

rjsterry wrote:

To have an inquiring and sceptical mind.

I started being a bit skeptical about Santa one year and questioned how every house in the world could be visited in just one night.
My Dad said that the world revolves. Duh, of course Dad, everyone knows that :roll:
Then he said that Santa traveled around the world in the same direction that the world revolves, so he actually has more than 24 hours to visit all the houses.

And something clicked. Ah, of course, that made sense.
Didn't twig that 36 hours might still be pushing it

Well, it kept me quiet for another year anyway.

msmancunia

That if your dad says he's going out "to see a man about a dog", he won't be coming back with a new puppy. My brother and I didn't forgive him for weeks.

CiB

msmancunia wrote:

That if your dad says he's going out "to see a man about a dog", he won't be coming back with a new puppy. My brother and I didn't forgive him for weeks.

Ha. My old boy did that; disappeared round the back of the chicken shed to see a man about a dog. I was gutted when he came back without one.

airbag

rjsterry wrote:

To have an inquiring and sceptical mind.

This. Specifically, I'd want them to learn science. Not the facts (though that helps), but the thought process. In particular why numbers and statistics are so valuable, and how they are used to mislead. If only everyone knew that correlation (say, the correlation between wearing a helmet in an accident and not being dead ) does not imply causation, and that making claims is a lot easier than backing them up...

rick_chasey

They f*ck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were f*cked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

rubertoe

Why do things today that cannot be put of 'til tomorrow.

Mum knows best.

Its nice to be important, its much more important to be nice. (see what I did there?)

Agent57

Kids should be coached to be polite, treat others with respect, and to question things. They should be coached how to argue, and when not to argue (or at least argue any further). They should be coached to be independent, to stand their ground without being obstinate, and given a solid grounding in personal finances.

Boys should be taught to stand close enough to the urinal that they don't piss all over the floor and themselves. They should also be taught what a "gentleman's wash" is (this does not have to be a demonstration). O_o

davis

CiB wrote:

How apostrophes work

rubertoe wrote:

Its nice to be important, its much more important to be nice.

Did yer mam teach yer nowt?

EKE_38BPM

That doors are no longer allowed to have knobs.
That on this forum, Shakespeare would not be allowed to write "If you prick us, do we not bleed."
That censorship is, generally, a bad thing.

davet2

how to light a fire, how to kill and prepare an animal

rick_chasey

EKE_38BPM wrote:

That doors are no longer allowed to have knobs.
That on this forum, Shakespeare would not be allowed to write "If you prick us, do we not bleed."
That censorship is, generally, a bad thing.

You can say whatever you want.

Just not necessarily on a privately owned forum .

SteppenHerring

I think I'm doing OK with the junior Herring (age 12). He's close to evens for a 10 (30'22") has a few BC points and knows to shoulder check before changing his line. He can ride comfortably in a bunch without doing anything random. He can also cook fairly well and is polite. He's coming up to the age when he needs to know how to treat women with respect and to use plenty of lube and take it slowly if she's never had it in the back door before.

Oh, and I haven't taught him how to true a wheel yet.

EKE_38BPM

Not to drop litter. I saw a ~10 year old come out of a supermarket this morning and in full view of her mum (I presume), she dropped some litter and then walked straight past a bin. That really winds me up.

kieranb

We are working on teaching them how to make our tea and coffee just right.
Wine is actually similar to a fruit juice so, no, they can't have fizzy drinks when we have wine.
Our house is not a democracy
Life is not fair but that's mainly becasue people make it so and then use 'Life's not fair' to excuse their selfish behaviour.
Just by living in a modern liberal democracy they are very lucky
We won't always be able to support them

secretsam

Kieran_Burns wrote:

I would teach them that:

The world owes them nothing
You get out of life what you put in
The green cross code
The magic floor that takes dirty clothes and turns them into freshly washed and ironed ones does not in fact exist

+1

But I'd add "Respect is earned" and "Treat others the way you'd like to be treated"

Oh, and that fame does bestow the status of a role model on anyone

Finally, Bristol City ARE the greatest team in the world, regardless of what all the plastic Mancs/Scousers/Chelski/Arsenal fans might say

secretsam

SteppenHerring wrote:

I think I'm doing OK with the junior Herring (age 12). He's close to evens for a 10 (30'22") has a few BC points and knows to shoulder check before changing his line. He can ride comfortably in a bunch without doing anything random. He can also cook fairly well and is polite. He's coming up to the age when he needs to know how to treat women with respect and to use plenty of lube and take it slowly if she's never had it in the back door before.

Oh, and I haven't taught him how to true a wheel yet.

PML - can't believe you wrote that on here, and got away with it

flimflam_machine

EKE_38BPM wrote:

Seeing as Commuting Chat has become an exclave of Mumsnet I thought I'd ask what the hivemind thinks that kids should be taught, outside of the basics such as tying their shoelaces.

I think every kid should be taught how to swim, a foreign language, ride a bike (obviously), play an instrument (mixing doesn't count) and a martial art.
Of those five I can ride a bike and swim (not very well).

So, what else would the hivemind add and how many of my list can you do?

Of your list I can do 1, 2 (enough to get by), 3, 4 (amateurishly) and I've dabbled a bit in 5.Interesting take on this here. The suggested list of things you should do with your child:

1: Play with fire
2: Give them a pocket knife (and teach them how to use it)
3: Throw a spear
4: Dismantle an appliance (like a dishwasher)
5a: Break the DMCA (Digital Millennium Copyright Act)
5b: Drive a car

EKE_38BPM

flimflam_machine wrote:

EKE_38BPM wrote:

Seeing as Commuting Chat has become an exclave of Mumsnet I thought I'd ask what the hivemind thinks that kids should be taught, outside of the basics such as tying their shoelaces.

I think every kid should be taught how to swim, a foreign language, ride a bike (obviously), play an instrument (mixing doesn't count) and a martial art.
Of those five I can ride a bike and swim (not very well).

So, what else would the hivemind add and how many of my list can you do?

Of your list I can do 1, 2 (enough to get by), 3, 4 (amateurishly) and I've dabbled a bit in 5.Interesting take on this here. The suggested list of things you should do with your child:

1: Play with fire
2: Give them a pocket knife (and teach them how to use it)
3: Throw a spear
4: Dismantle an appliance (like a dishwasher)
5a: Break the DMCA (Digital Millennium Copyright Act)
5b: Drive a car

Very interesting.

I did nearly all of those things as a kid.
1: I nearly burnt the kitchen as a kid (making toast unsupervised), but as I knew how fire lives I knew how to kill it.
2: I never owned a pocket knife, but my dad was a builder and during school holidays I used to go to work with him to 'help'. To keep me from under his feet I was given little tasks and sharpening tools was high on the list. I can put a damned fine edge on a chisel/plane/knife and loved whittling bits of wood.
3: I have vague memories of throwing sharpened sticks with my brother at various targets (boxes, not animals). Just kids messing around, but we had the freedom and space to do it.
4: My brother was always taking things apart to see how they worked and as the little brother I was always watching. I used to call his room "the place where technology goes to die". I learned a lot, mainly that my brother can't fix everything.
5a: I lived in the days of making tapes and pirate videos. Copyright laws got broken on a nearly daily basis.
5b: When I was 12 I was on a family holiday in Florida and my dad let me drive a V8 Oldmobile. It is still probably the most powerful car I've ever driven and I loved it. Fast forward ~25 years and I was on holiday in Florida with my neice and I let her drive our hire car. She loved it too. For her 17th birthday, my present to her was her CBT (motorbike test).

Kids these days seem to be too wrapped up in cotton wool. I love most of my scars and chicks dig 'em, right?

mtb-idle

That cycling is an addiction?

bails87

How to "shred the gnar":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qmQrEM5 ... ure=relmfu

Best dad/kid ever!

tailwindhome

To avoid cigar smoking, jewellry wearing, white haired men in shellsuits

PBo

TailWindHome wrote:

To avoid cigar smoking, jewellry wearing, white haired men in shellsuits

"Now then, now then..."

I was sad to hear jim allegedly did more breaking than fixing....

EKE_38BPM

bails87 wrote:

How to "shred the gnar":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qmQrEM5 ... ure=relmfu
Best dad/kid ever!

+1
That was brilliant! I love the bits when he shouts "I did it!" and "Yeah!"

clarkey cat

1. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush
2. When in Rome, do as the Romans do.
3. Absence makes the heart grow fonder
4. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
5. Life's a bitch and then you die.
6. Dont be a cliche.

PedalPedant

EKE_38BPM wrote:

I think every kid should be taught how to swim,

Fair enough.

a foreign language

Not sure about this one, if you're not going to actually use it you'll never get properly fluent and just forget it all anyway.

ride a bike (obviously)

Goes without saying.

play an instrument (mixing doesn't count)

In my experience kids with an aptitude for music will find an outlet without any external pressure. Those without aptitude will resent being pushed. What about other art forms? Sculpture, painting, dance?

and a martial art.

Fencing, archery, that sort of thing?

PP

(I can do the three I consider worthwhile)

bompington

PedalPedant wrote:

I consider worthwhile the three I can do

FTFY