To Kill A Mockingmouse

cornerblock

Oh shitz, just sitting here and saw a little bloody mouse out of the corner of my eye. It took off as soon as I saw it, so who knows where it's gone? Now I am not too bothered by mice, but if the mrs, who is upstairs at the moment finds out that we have 'guests', she will freak out so much you will all hear her across this land! I blame her, she has been out in the garden all day, with the doors open and now the little beggars are in.Dilemma, do I warn her? Or just hope the little mousey makes his way back to the garden. I have used a humane trap for the garden, she will freak out even if she sees one outside! They seem to love chocolate, as does the wife, I normally trap them then ride up to the local woods and release them by the big posh houses. I think I'll keep shtum.

Fastlad

hoots mon.....there's a moose, loose. aboot this hoose

verylonglegs

They carry disease, you need to get rid.

sandyballs

Cornerblock wrote:

I normally trap them then ride up to the local woods and release them by the big posh houses.

Jesus, what size frame do you normally ride if you can fit on a mouse?

cornerblock

Sandyballs wrote:

Cornerblock wrote:

I normally trap them then ride up to the local woods and release them by the big posh houses.

Jesus, what size frame do you normally ride if you can fit on a mouse?

You have to lube them, always an annoying little squeak otherwise!

Well I told her this morning, made her promise to stay calm and not freak out. She didn't cause any damage to my eardrums, just did that half-cry half -panic face thing! Will need to put the traps out today and catch the pesky little thing just to put her mind at rest, and give me some peace.

nweststeyn

Solution.

Get a tiny, TINY, pair of clogs. Fill up the inside of the clogs with adhesive, and then put some extra adhesive on the base of the clogs and place them over there, where? there on the stairs!

A little mouse can't resist the temptation of trying on a smart new pair of clogs on the stairs. He will then be stuck, and you can catch him and ride him up to the posh houses.

Aggieboy

Get rid asap. They breed like mice.

pinno

Caught a mouse kindly brought in by my sadistic cat (who wanted to torment it until death) in a humane mousetrap.

I used kitkat as bate in the trap. I put the trap parallel to the skirting boards and hey presto - overnight one fat mouse in the trap. The trap was now in the middle of the floor 'cos obviously the mouse had wriggled furiously inside it trying to get out. Took it out to my workbench in the garage and released the mouse. It was wet; covered in sweat. Instead of running away, he fervently got on with the business of cleaning himeself up and occassionally lifting his head looking me straight in the eye to utter a loud and resentful, fullsome 'squeek'. I guessed he did not see me as a threat but I just wonder what he was thinking?
"You basket, what d'ya do that for..."
"Can't you see i'm sorting myself - f**k off..."
I dunno. If we were the size of mice, we would be on the cats menu.

Have they started that pathetic, ecclectic (where are all the other Universities?) ra ra ra, go ginger, boat race again yet? I'm off on my bike, 3 pockets, 2 eccles cakes per pocket....mmm let me see...

cornerblock

Well the traps are set. Two with peanut butter and one with chocolate Philadelphia, which is delicious. If a chocolate cheese combo doesn't entice the mice, what will? Lets hope I'm riding up to the woods later to release a mouse. The wife has been a nervous wreck all day, while I am walking around like Basil Fawlty, checking under, behind, on top of everywhere! That reminds me, better check the cheese biscuit tin.

Aggieboy

Some inspiration here for you. You'll have to excuse the spelling of the title, it's from the dirt monkeys threads.

cornerblock

I definitely won't be showing her those pictures Aggie! We've gone for the humane type traps, so hopefully no dead mice on view, otherwise I'll have the wife fainting or something. She really is petrified of them, no matter how much I try and reassure her. Just hope I catch one, so she can think that it's fine. Also I don't want to waste any more of my chocolate Philadelphia on the little pests, it's for me hot cross buns!

Aggieboy

You sure it's not a rat that's in your house, I've heard your wife is quite dirty.

cornerblock

Well she does like the chocolate spread all over!

pinno

Can we have an update in the morning Cornerblock?
Maybe a mouse-in-the-house column perhaps.
Of course, if you feed him the Philly and chocolate, then let him go, he will keep coming back - with his mates!
Reminds me of the line from The Good the Bad and the Ugly -
"One b4stard goes in and a whole load of b4stards come out"

itboffin

if you think you've got one mouse then you're kidding yourself.

Get thee some traps and lots of poison ASAP, this is war - it's you or them!

cornerblock

Well the traps are empty this morning, they may need to be re-positioned. I will not be out smarted by a mouse!

pinno

They don't like cheese, common misconception - nuts, chocolate wafers, bird seed and electric cables.

ddraver

We had one in our student house. we put it on our kitchen surface (we were those sorts of students) and prepared my lunch one day not noticing that the dead body was just underneath my sandwich until I'd finished it.....

cornerblock

One week on and the little git has not been caught. Saw it again tonight, so did the wife, she freaked out, I got angry, this fecker has to go! Five traps dotted around the place and it still has not taken the bait. Fark the humane traps, this is war and it has to go! It's laughing at us, any advice is welcome. If it won't take the peanut butter or chocolate, why would it go for poison? As far as I know there is no other food source, we've cleaned top to bottom and the intruder is still not gone.

jordan_217

Code blue - you need to deploy a cat.

tim_wand

Whilst sharing a house at Uni , I returned one day from a hard days lectures to find my co-residents crowded around the pedal bin staring into it.

To cut a long story short they had caught a mouse that had been sh*tting in all the kitchen cuboards.

Collectively they had decided that the best way to dispose of said pest was to put it in the empty pedal bin with bleech in the bottom then seal the top with cling film in an attempt to gas it!!!

Needless to say it just resulted in the poor creature just having burnt feet.

Regretfully I had to dispatch it with a Brick on the patio.

The bright spark who's idea this was (Daniel Bowers) went on to become a top Barrister. I think he might even be a judge now , I d hate to come before his sentencing recomendations

ddraver

Aggieboy

tim wand wrote:

Whilst sharing a house at Uni , I returned one day from a hard days lectures to find my co-residents crowded around the pedal bin staring into it.

To cut a long story short they had caught a mouse that had been sh*tting in all the kitchen cuboards.

Collectively they had decided that the best way to dispose of said pest was to put it in the empty pedal bin with bleech in the bottom then seal the top with cling film in an attempt to gas it!!!

Needless to say it just resulted in the poor creature just having burnt feet.

Regretfully I had to dispatch it with a Brick on the patio.

The bright spark who's idea this was (Daniel Bowers) went on to become a top Barrister. I think he might even be a judge now , I d hate to come before his sentencing recomendations

Cornerblock - get tim wand's mate to sentence it. It won't stay inside for long.

cornerblock

Aggieboy wrote:

Cornerblock - get tim wand's mate to sentence it. It won't stay inside for long.

I like your thinking Aggie, but I'd prefer a hardliner now...

greg66_tri_v2.0

Cornerblock wrote:

One week on and the little git has not been caught. Saw it again tonight, so did the wife, she freaked out, I got angry, this fecker has to go! Five traps dotted around the place and it still has not taken the bait. Fark the humane traps, this is war and it has to go! It's laughing at us, any advice is welcome. If it won't take the peanut butter or chocolate, why would it go for poison? As far as I know there is no other food source, we've cleaned top to bottom and the intruder is still not gone.

Tom & Jerry-style traps, baited with chocolate glued to the Death Post with jam. You need to place the traps along the mouse runs: usually along a wall

In other news, cats bring you a live mouse because they are trying to get you to kill it. They like to pass on their mad slaying skillz.

griffsters

Cornerblock wrote:

I will not be out smarted by a mouse!

You reckon

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RJX3YWevts

Pross

Think I've got some in my loft. Any chance I have for a lie in gets ruined by scratching sounds from the roof space. Can't see any evidence up there though, no droppings or anything chewed. One got into my fishing tackle box one winter, I went out to the shed to get my kit ready for the first fishing trip of the year and the thing flew out at me. It had spent months in the box with several kilos of high protein bait and was huge. Wrecked all my kit and left about 5mm depth of pee in the bottom of the tackle box. I hate the bloody creatures so no humane traps for me!

cornerblock

Griffsters wrote:

Cornerblock wrote:

I will not be out smarted by a mouse!

You reckon

I had a feeling I may regret those words.

Redhog14

Had mice a few a years ago, and tried the snapper traps (from the local pet store, love it!) caught nothing till I deployed a box trap and then caught 7 of the wee shites! used rice cakes as bait then used to drop them off at a field on my way to work, it was winter though so at -7degC outside not sure they lasted long. They can be quite cheeky, was sitting up late watching a movie on my own and one of them popped out next to the fireplace, we sat there starign at each other for ages it seems. Cat does the hard work these days.

Best story I have on mice was in a mates farmhouse where in lived one mean MF of a cat which hunted rabbits and grouse, they racket it made in frustration one night trying to get a dead grouse through the cat flap was huge. The cat also once caught a rabbit and brought it in to to show one of the vegetarian housemates who was incapacited due to a huge hernia operation, as he lay immobile on the couch the cat proceeded to eviserate the rabbit in front of him... loved that cat!
Anyway one night we trapped a mouse in an old fashioned tea box, using a a pencil as a prop tied to string (real Tom & Jerry stuff) we woke up said cat for a meal where upon it it gave us a look as if to say "don't feed me peanuts when I want a burger" and fucked off outside!