Not my most professional moment

Kieran_Burns

My bosses boss sent me and my boss an email this morning about a thing called "shift left"; which is about moving tasks to teams more suited to carrying them out as your business needs change and expand.

He detailed how we need to keep abreast of the task moves into and out of the various teams and ensure that we know who is now responsible and that all the due diligence work has been carried out.

I replied with this:

greg66_tri_v2.0

Oh, how they laughed to see KB repeatedly swiping his security pass and getting BEEP and a red light.

Cafewanda

He used to work there

So. Now you've got all this time on your hands K_B.........................

Kieran_Burns

I was on form this morning I have to admit. I did send an email to a senior manager explaining that it is physically impossible to restore data that is two weeks old from a tape that is only 2 days old, unless Dr Who was involved.

and yes I did say Dr Who.

I hadn't had a coffee by this point, I blame him for sending daft questions that early in the working day.

dhope

I recently sent an email saying that it was the traders that needed upgrading rather than their workstations.

Nancy Luger

Kieran_Burns wrote:

I was on form this morning I have to admit. I did send an email to a senior manager explaining that it is physically impossible to restore data that is two weeks old from a tape that is only 2 days old, unless Dr Who was involved.

and yes I did say Dr Who.

I hadn't had a coffee by this point, I blame him for sending daft questions that early in the working day.

Priceless! i got an email today that's doing the rounds, supposedly genuine email communication between a bloke and his housing assoc. landlords, one of the entries was:

Out Of Office Alert: I am currently on leave, travelling through time. I will be back last week.

lost_in_thought

Nancy Luger wrote:

Kieran_Burns wrote:

I was on form this morning I have to admit. I did send an email to a senior manager explaining that it is physically impossible to restore data that is two weeks old from a tape that is only 2 days old, unless Dr Who was involved.

and yes I did say Dr Who.

I hadn't had a coffee by this point, I blame him for sending daft questions that early in the working day.

Priceless! i got an email today that's doing the rounds, supposedly genuine email communication between a bloke and his housing assoc. landlords, one of the entries was:

Out Of Office Alert: I am currently on leave, travelling through time. I will be back last week.

Hahahaha! It's almost worth going back into the financial sector just to set that up as my autoreply

bails87

lost_in_thought wrote:

Nancy Luger wrote:

Kieran_Burns wrote:

I was on form this morning I have to admit. I did send an email to a senior manager explaining that it is physically impossible to restore data that is two weeks old from a tape that is only 2 days old, unless Dr Who was involved.

and yes I did say Dr Who.

I hadn't had a coffee by this point, I blame him for sending daft questions that early in the working day.

Priceless! i got an email today that's doing the rounds, supposedly genuine email communication between a bloke and his housing assoc. landlords, one of the entries was:

Out Of Office Alert: I am currently on leave, travelling through time. I will be back last week.

Hahahaha! It's almost worth going back into the financial sector just to set that up as my autoreply

Surely "I am currently on leave, travelling through time. I will be back a few years ago to prevent the shtick hitting the fan" would be better

mudcow007

Kieran_Burns wrote:

I was on form this morning I have to admit. I did send an email to a senior manager explaining that it is physically impossible to restore data that is two weeks old from a tape that is only 2 days old, unless Dr Who was involved.

and yes I did say Dr Who.

I hadn't had a coffee by this point, I blame him for sending daft questions that early in the working day.

i had a user ask me yesterday "ive lost some files can you get them back"?

I replied "possibly, how old were the files"?

"oh, about 3 years"

"erm...no i doubt it"

shouldbeinbed

I'm always of tho opinion at work that pompous stuff such as this needs a little knock niw and again.

sketchley

My MD once asked me while I was sitting on comms room floor trying to fix it what was wrong with e-mail and when it was going to be fixed. He was the 4th director to ask the same question in about 20 mins. I was under pressure and I snapped and replied "I can either f*cking fix it or stop and waste time f*cking explaining to you what's wrong which you won't understand anyway. I know it's urgent so f*ck off and let me fix it". His shocked reply was along the line of "I am the MD you know" before storming out. When back up and running I want to apologise only to be told that I was right, but could I tone the language down next time and not pull him up in front of other staff.

We do have some history though, he pulled me up on something minor once (about 10 years ago) when I was working all hours and making the company a lot of money, the stand up row we had resulted in me telling him what exactly what I thought of him before resigning. The argument caused the ops director to shut the office down early (about 3pm) as everyone in the building could hear me tearing him apart.

Looking back I wonder how I'm still here sometimes......

walkingbootweather

Aha Management. :roll:

In case anyone is interested, my signature is a real quote from our one-time MD in response to a long history of problems and a very public disagreement about the dissemination (or otherwise) of vital information.

I still don't think he understand why everyone stopped arguing, then left shaking heads.

The Rookie

We currently have a bit of an employee retention policy, one major factor frequantly cited is poor communications, we usually only find out someone is leaving when the car drops on our desk to sign for them.......Oh the irony....to cap it all off they had a well known about management event to discuss it then refused to tell us what was discussed!

Simon

NGale

Believe it or not I am usually the meek and mild type at work, I like to keep my head down, get on with my work and avoid trouble, I just seeth quietly later on at home.

However when I was working in the prison service (admin staff not a prison officer) and the POA went out on their one day wildcat strike I walked with them (I was a POA member so supported my colleagues) We had a prat of a governor who frankly couldn't run an orgy in a knocking shop and on the day of the walk out I finally snapped and told him what an incompetent idiot I thought he was and recieved a round of applause from a crowd of prison officers when I said they had more respect for the sex offenders on the inside than they did for him.

I am still surprised to this day I wasn't sacked on the spot!

The governor after that avoided me as much as possible and I made a friend out of the deputy governor

Jay dubbleU

They can't sack me - nobody knows what I do 8)

I'm due to retire in January so my manager asked me to prepare a report of exactly what I do - came to eight pages of A4 - she asked me if she could have a management overview - pointed out to her that was the management overview and the full report came to 40+ pages - she hasn't mentioned it since

NGale

Jay dubbleU wrote:

They can't sack me - nobody knows what I do 8)

I know a prison officer like that. he used to just turn up at the start of shift, walk around with a clip board or folder, take lunch at the same time as everyone else. It was 5 years before a governor asked him what he actually did.

Jay dubbleU

Ah - the clip board - natures passport

sketchley

Can't sack me everyone thinks I know something they don't.

Twostage

Jay dubbleU wrote:

They can't sack me - nobody knows what I do 8)

I'm due to retire in January so my manager asked me to prepare a report of exactly what I do.

Your boss doesn't know what you do ? Nice one

Headhuunter

dhope wrote:

I recently sent an email saying that it was the traders that needed upgrading rather than their workstations.

I think you've hit the nail on the head for your bank!

veronese68

This place is the embodiment ofunprofessional at almost every level. Working with old cars we have a bit of an old school motor trade attitude to most things. Political correctness is very much frowned upon.

clarkey cat

Large banks are the most bonkers places on the planet. I am literally AGAPE half the time.

The other half I'm on here.

Jay dubbleU

Twostage wrote:

Jay dubbleU wrote:

They can't sack me - nobody knows what I do 8)

I'm due to retire in January so my manager asked me to prepare a report of exactly what I do.

Your boss doesn't know what you do ? Nice one

My boss is a planner - her knowledge of geophysics could be written on the head of a small pin

EdZed

The Beginner wrote:

We currently have a bit of an employee retention policy, one major factor frequantly cited is poor communications, we usually only find out someone is leaving when the car drops on our desk to sign for them.......Oh the irony....to cap it all off they had a well known about management event to discuss it then refused to tell us what was discussed!

Simon

Blimey, you get a car when you leave your place, even if it's covered in graffiti it would be worth getting a job at your company. How do you get everyone to sign it without the recipient seeing it first though?

walkingbootweather

Our employee retention policy seems to be "we'll keep him, him and her, and get rid of them two".

NGale

my job in the prison was one of those 'what does she do types of jobs' 5 grand more in pay and it would have been perfect. Everyone let me get on with it and people dared not disturb me while the Archers was on.