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Anyone adopted a child from abroad?

neilo23neilo23 Posts: 783
edited September 2011 in The bottom bracket
I don't generally do the internet, that's why I'm asking here.

Please, only personal messages. Will be treated in privacy.

Thanks.

Posts

  • Madonna adopted Shaun Wright-Phillips.Does that count?
  • EKE_38BPMEKE_38BPM Posts: 5,821
    Angelina Jolie seems to adopt any child who isn't nailed down/chained to something sturdy.
    FCN 3: Raleigh Record Ace fixie-to be resurrected sometime in the future
    FCN 4: Planet X Schmaffenschmack 2- workhorse
    FCN 9: B Twin Vitamin - winter commuter/loan bike for trainees

    I'm hungry. I'm always hungry!
  • cooldadcooldad Posts: 32,599
    Check the classifieds in the Bombay Times.
    I don't do smileys.

    There is no secret ingredient - Kung Fu Panda

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  • neilo23neilo23 Posts: 783
    Thanks for the constructive comments. Dickheads.
  • mouthmouth Posts: 1,195
    I honestly thought the title was gonna be a euphemism for importing a bike from Italy or something.
    The only disability in life is a poor attitude.
  • Dag TDag T Posts: 22
    Kind of an odd question to ask on a biking forum, don't you think?
  • PostieJohnPostieJohn Posts: 1,105
    I am an adoptive UK parent, quite why you you want to adopt from abroad where social care is not as good, or at least documented, is beyond me.
  • AnonymousAnonymous Posts: 79,667
    neilo23 wrote:
    Thanks for the constructive comments. Dickheads.

    What did you expect ?



    yeah, mate, piece of piss......Madonna and Angelina have dunnit, so its alright, innit ?
  • Does grabing and running count as adopting? I like to think of that style as "surprise adoptions". Only way to make it better is to get the lime, string and bring Sheeps with.
  • PepPep Posts: 501
    My cousin in Italy and her husband sould not conceive. They adopted a child from Vietnam.

    Huge huge amount of admin work. And tons of community worker to screen you.

    She was asked the minimum age she was willing to adopt and answered 2yr. Tricky thing: the younger the child the easier is to make bond, but also the longer the waiting time and risk of exclusion as most parents prefer younger children.

    My cousin (early 40s), married her long time partner (mid-40s) only to make it easier to adopt. Regulation in Italy is more conservative, perhaps UK is more "advanced" in this respect.

    The whole process took ~2yr, can't remember.

    Dunno why she adopted from abroad, maybe was easier, no idea why Vietnam. I know she did not really mind which country.

    The baby came from a very poor family, so when very young she was not in great health, probably poor diet early on, etc.

    They spent about 1month in Vietnam between court and admin work.

    She was unhappy that for 2yr after she came home with the baby the biological mother still had the right to claim the baby back. Much anxiety for my cousin.

    They are a good family for what I can tell.
    Happy child wth strong bonds to parents.

    I heard a similar story from a woman at the local running club, here in UK. Not much different from my relative in Italy.
  • Seems a fair enough question - maybe they fall foul of the adoption rules in the UK - not something I've looked into as I've enough kids of my own but don't they have quite strict rules on stuff like age etc. That said a little lighthearted comment was inevitable.

    it's a hard life if you don't weaken.
  • mouthmouth Posts: 1,195
    FWIW IMO there are plenty of kids who need help here. Since I was adopted at 10 years old I'd like to think my opinion is valid.

    To be honest it makes me think of those charity adverts for starving African kids and how our 2 quid a month will help. CHARITY STARTS AT HOME. Start here and if you can't adopt under UK law, ask yourself why and think again about your objective.

    Though I haven't come across one, there is probably a forum about adoption and that would certainly be a better place to start.
    The only disability in life is a poor attitude.
  • I wonder if Angelinas adoptive kids pray every night to Santa that when they grow up their mum does a Woody Allen?
  • PepPep Posts: 501
    Mouth wrote:
    Start here and if you can't adopt under UK law, ask yourself why and think again about your objective.

    Dunno why many UK adopt from abroad, but I imagine legal and admin reason, etc, is part of the burden.
    Don't think that adopting abroad skip UK rules, it doesn't. You are still vetted by the UK system.

    I don't think adopting from abroad is any less good than adopting here.
    Children need parent(s). Does really make any difference if they are UK children or not.
  • AnonymousAnonymous Posts: 79,667
    I wonder if Angelinas adoptive kids pray every night to Santa that when they grow up their mum does a Woody Allen?

    bad boy, dirty boy, in your bed.... :D

    Wrong, but funny.
  • GazzaputtGazzaputt Posts: 3,227
    I wouldn't dream of bringing up a child from another nation here.

    Imagine the aggravation as the kid goes through school? Kids aren't the kindest as we all know.
  • PepPep Posts: 501
    Gazzaputt wrote:
    I wouldn't dream of bringing up a child from another nation here.

    Imagine the aggravation as the kid goes through school? Kids aren't the kindest as we all know.

    Flawed argument I'm afraid. Like those who are against gay couples adopting children because "it's best for the kid to have 2 straight parents".

    The point is not whether is better to bring up a child here or in a "better" place.
    The point is: is it better for a child to be adopted in UK, or being an orphan somewhere else?
  • PostieJohnPostieJohn Posts: 1,105
    I think there is the perception that adoption from abroad is 'easier', and far less intrusive.
    To that end, you really can't be guarded when adopting and if you're trying to 'hide' something, you never will.

    The whole process went from rewarding and insightful to down right personal and intrusive.
    You just have to go with it, if it's what you really want.

    There was a couple in our initial, week long, staring point, who were clearly unsuitable.
    The wife was caught up with the romance of a baby, and also with major issues concerning her father (it was amusing to watch, in a car crash sort of way).
    I guess they might have gone for a foreign adoption, hoping they wouldn't 'get found out'.
    Ideally she'll sort out her issues though.
  • PostieJohnPostieJohn Posts: 1,105
    Pep wrote:
    I don't think adopting from abroad is any less good than adopting here.
    Children need parent(s). Does really make any difference if they are UK children or not.
    Say what you like about UK social services, but at least they are there.
    Therefore when adopting from the UK you'll get a decent amount of knowledge as to why your child is in care.
    This may not be forthcoming from other countries and that could be disastrous in your childs development.
  • You could do it on a budget-get one from Bradford and save on the airfare/import duty!
  • PepPep Posts: 501
    PostieJohn wrote:
    Therefore when adopting from the UK you'll get a decent amount of knowledge as to why your child is in care.
    This may not be forthcoming from other countries

    I can only speak for the one case I know.
    You are right, they knew nothing about the child until the moment they were presented to her.
  • neilo23neilo23 Posts: 783
    I never expected this to go on for 2 pages. It was a serious question which I didn't want to be discussed in a public forum (hence "pms" only and my disclaimer "this is the only froum I use..").

    But thanks to Mr X for the constructive PM. We're a mixture of people and thought that someone had some sort of advice.

    Serves me right
  • PostieJohnPostieJohn Posts: 1,105
    So you start a thread.
    In an open cycling forum, (when perhaps a google search would have lead you to the adoption uk website/forum).
    You get a few silly answers, you get titsy, what did you expect, plus some genuine insight.

    But because none the genuine help/advise came within your chosen form of reply, you are not prepared to enter into the discussion, you started.

    I hope you've a bloody good reason, cos if you haven't, this level of self serving selfishness, won't get you to far through any adoption process.
  • NuggsNuggs Posts: 1,804
    I hate it when the internet doesn't behave like I want it to.
  • estampidaestampida Posts: 1,008
    Only for the nite :twisted:
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