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Document Approval - Is your manager a douche!

KaiseKaise Posts: 2,498
edited July 2011 in The Crudcatcher
So i have been composing a 350 page report since January and it was supposed to be signed and delivered to the customer before the end of June, it is now nearly the end of July and i have been chasing the final approval signatory for weeks to get him to read it..........

He only decides he has to read it today because i told him for the third time that the payment milestone attached to the document delivery is worth about £2.3m, Now he is interested!

Douche bag!

Posts

  • AndyAndy Posts: 8,206
    OK
  • ThewaylanderThewaylander Posts: 8,767
    Always mention cash reamifications.

    its the only way to make them pull there fingers out.

    Also tell him that in the 3 weeks he has wasted that at an interest rate of 1.5% he has lost the company 2k already :)
  • Ryan JonesRyan Jones Posts: 775
    Just what Tea and Cake was made for !
  • bails87bails87 Posts: 13,317
    Stick it up his arrse and shiit on his desk.

    Then ask for a promotion.
    MTB/CX

    "As I said last time, it won't happen again."
  • If you can't fake your bosses signature and then convince him he's read and signed it you don't have the requisite skills to progress.....
    All hail the FSM and his noodly appendage!
  • RaymondavalonRaymondavalon Posts: 5,346
    Always mention cash reamifications.

    Reamification? is that the cash payment you make to Joshtp for buttsex?
  • projectsomeprojectsome Posts: 4,478
    kaiser83 wrote:
    So i have been composing a 350 page report since January and it was supposed to be signed and delivered to the customer before the end of June, it is now nearly the end of July and i have been chasing the final approval signatory for weeks to get him to read it..........

    He only decides he has to read it today because i told him for the third time that the payment milestone attached to the document delivery is worth about £2.3m, Now he is interested!

    Douche bag!

    Delegation....
    FARKBOOK TWATTER Happiness is my censored mood!
  • Go over his head and try to take over his job!!!
  • 97th choice97th choice Posts: 2,305
    kaiser83 wrote:
    So i have been composing a 350 page report since January!

    wow, your job really sucks
    Too-ra-loo-ra, too-ra-loo-rye, aye

    Giant Trance
    Radon ZR 27.5 Race
    Btwin Alur700
    Merida CX500
  • It seems to me that you are the greatest ever professional and I have nominated you for a (an) Nobel prize and have transfered 99% of my money and have sent my daughters to you and will , for ever, worship your 350 page report and strongly advise people not to use it as ar5e paper.

    You are a genius.
  • GazlarGazlar Posts: 8,110
    bails87 wrote:
    Stick it up his arrse and shiit on his desk.

    Then ask for a promotion.

    That might work in the NHS but this is real work were talking about, not a school science project on pulse rates ;)

    Have you tried decorating his office to look like the inside of a cat?, not sure how it would help, but I'm deperate to goad someone into decorating their workplace so it looks like the inside of a cat.
    Mountain biking is like sex.......more fun when someone else is getting hurt
    Amy
    Farnsworth
    Zapp
  • KaiseKaise Posts: 2,498
    You are a genius.

    thanks allan, i knew someone would appreciate the hard work and long hours i have put in to this.

    If anyone needs me i'll be walking to the suspension bridge to get some air and think about my prospects UURRRGGGHHH
  • GazlarGazlar Posts: 8,110
    Remember to nip to B&Q to get some inside of a cat style decorating items while your out!

    AND DON'T.........



    .....slam the door
    Mountain biking is like sex.......more fun when someone else is getting hurt
    Amy
    Farnsworth
    Zapp
  • MontevideoguyMontevideoguy Posts: 2,336
    You need to take the initiative

    This provides the tools you need
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RGLgJe9Keo

    (warning: contains Scottish accents)
    Formally known as Coatbridgeguy
  • NorthwindNorthwind Posts: 15,475
    Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target—providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. Once that's accomplished, grasp his hair as close to the scalp as you're able to and yank his head back while using your Ka-Bar combat knife to make a lateral cut across his throat. Make sure you sever both the carotid artery and jugular vein while piercing the windpipe, and press hard; the larynx

    Coincidentally, I have a boss who is not a douche.
    Uncompromising extremist
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