Advice for the Rapture

MattC59
MattC59 Posts: 5,408
edited May 2011 in The bottom bracket
As you may or may not know, on Saturday 21st, it's the rapture. Basically, God's elect will rise up to heaven and the rest of us are f*cked. Personally, I've got front row seats in hell booked, as I believe, that religion / faith in god is born out of mans lack of understanding of the world around him, and it's all a load of pony ! Actually, I'm sure I'll be here on Sunday, but I'm sure that there are some nutters out there that will interpret this event in their own twisted way and tell me that my life is actually what was meant by hell.
F*cking nutters !!

Anyway, a brief guide can be found here :D
http://www.youtube.com/somegreybloke#p/a/u/0/hmX-lZOYcVA
Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
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Comments

  • jrduquemin
    jrduquemin Posts: 791
    Bugger, I had plans for Sunday too :-(

    I've also got the Sky man coming round Saturday morning to re-align my dish, that'll be a waste of time if the world ends. At least i'll be able to watch it though :-D
    2010 Lynskey R230
    2013 Yeti SB66
  • verylonglegs
    verylonglegs Posts: 4,023
    I've an afternoon in the pub planned for tomorrow to watch the rugby final, what time is this all going down? Should I get on the shots a bit earlier than usual?
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    As you are a newly wed, (albeit not behaving like one) I'd have thought you would have more important things to do, on the day before Armaggedon, than repeating an old thread on which you posted. http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=12776573&highlight=

    Please get your priorities right!

    Anyone know what the weather's like next week?
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • bompington
    bompington Posts: 7,674
    In fact Christians have even more reason to disbelieve this loon than atheists - Jesus actually said that even he didn't know when this would happen, so I don't think some crazed american "preacher" is likely to be correct.
  • Cressers
    Cressers Posts: 1,329
    If you get raptured I'll look after your bikes...
  • Crapaud
    Crapaud Posts: 2,483
    Aggieboy wrote:
    Anyone know what the weather's like next week?
    Toasty.
    A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject - Churchill
  • thecrofter
    thecrofter Posts: 734
    bompington wrote:
    In fact Christians have even more reason to disbelieve this loon than atheists - Jesus actually said that even he didn't know when this would happen, so I don't think some crazed american "preacher" is likely to be correct.

    Ah yes, Mr B, but you're talking about real Christians rather than the lunatic cults (hope I've spelt that right) that inhabit most of the good old US of A. Think I'll maybe repent all my sins about 5.30 tomorrow just in case.
    You've no won the Big Cup since 1902!
  • Ands
    Ands Posts: 1,437
    If this means there will be no-one ringing church bells at 7am on Sunday morning then great - I get a lie-in. :lol:
  • DIESELDOG
    DIESELDOG Posts: 2,087
    Matt, I have front row tickets for hell anyway, all is good. Care to join?

    There may be a few of us though...

    Love n hugs

    DD
    Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    www.onemanandhisbike.co.uk
  • MattC59
    MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    DIESELDOG wrote:
    Care to join?
    Hell yeah !!!

    I'll be the one arriving backwards, in a fireball, to the sound of a V8 tearing its self apart :twisted:
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • DIESELDOG
    DIESELDOG Posts: 2,087
    MattC59 wrote:
    DIESELDOG wrote:
    Care to join?
    Hell yeah !!!

    I'll be the one arriving backwards, in a fireball, to the sound of a V8 tearing its self apart :twisted:

    Just your head backwards or all of you?

    Anyway, I'm already there, blood everywhere, who'd have thought a dog could make so much mess through something so trivial...

    Love n hugs

    DD

    The original DD will be fine...
    Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    www.onemanandhisbike.co.uk
  • northernneil
    northernneil Posts: 1,549
    this is brilliant we all die at 6pm tonight BUT 6pm everywhere on the planet, not 6pm at a particular time zone
  • MattC59
    MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    this is brilliant we all die at 6pm tonight BUT 6pm everywhere on the planet, not 6pm at a particular time zone

    Ace isn't it !!!

    Is it 6pm in the middle east (lets be generic and say that the good lord Jesus was from somewhere in that neck of the woods), they're two hours ahead, so the rapture will happen at 4pm UK time.

    or is it 6pm in California where Harold Camping is from ? In which case that's eight hours behind us, so 10am our time.

    F*ck, I might only have 1hr 12 minutes left !!!!
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • DIESELDOG
    DIESELDOG Posts: 2,087
    MattC59 wrote:
    this is brilliant we all die at 6pm tonight BUT 6pm everywhere on the planet, not 6pm at a particular time zone

    Ace isn't it !!!

    Is it 6pm in the middle east (lets be generic and say that the good lord Jesus was from somewhere in that neck of the woods), they're two hours ahead, so the rapture will happen at 4pm UK time.

    or is it 6pm in California where Harold Camping is from ? In which case that's eight hours behind us, so 10am our time.

    F*ck, I might only have 1hr 12 minutes left !!!!

    So make the most of it and get riding...

    Love n hugs

    DD
    Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    www.onemanandhisbike.co.uk
  • Ollieda
    Ollieda Posts: 1,010
    Isnt the end in october........today is mearly the begining of the end where the christians who are to be saved will be picked and taken to heaven. The rest of us just get to stick it out till the world burns in october.

    At least the roads will be a bit clearer for us to ride on!
  • GiantMike
    GiantMike Posts: 3,139
    I'll let you know how it goes. I'm 3.5 hours ahead of the UK so I can give you a decent warning if I get raptured. You might have a chance to pop to the 'God Shop' and get some face-time in.

    If you don't hear from me, assume the worst.Personally I think it's a typo. What they mean is Raped and Tortured.
  • loveaduck
    loveaduck Posts: 48
    Why didn't Wiggle mention this when i was placing my order. Bah! :evil:
    "I love you less than cake, but way more than Marmite!"
  • GiantMike
    GiantMike Posts: 3,139
    Well, I'm still here. Neither Raped nor Tortured. I'm a bit bored actually. It would have at least been an event to talk about.
  • Ollieda
    Ollieda Posts: 1,010
    Quote from the Telegraph reporting on the rapture so far:
    There were also unconfirmed reports that Tonga has, thus far, failed to boil into the Pacific.
  • freehub
    freehub Posts: 4,257
    The Rapture is an underground complex in the computer game Bioshock and Bioshock 2.
  • brucey72
    brucey72 Posts: 1,086
    I'm still here so am off to the pub to celebrate
  • ratsbeyfus
    ratsbeyfus Posts: 2,841
    How to make money out of rapture loons - promise to look after their abandoned pets (for a fee) in the build up to armageddon:

    http://eternal-earthbound-pets.com/

    The FAQ's are great!


    I had one of them red bikes but I don't any more. Sad face.

    @ratsbey
  • MattC59
    MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    DIESELDOG wrote:
    MattC59 wrote:
    this is brilliant we all die at 6pm tonight BUT 6pm everywhere on the planet, not 6pm at a particular time zone

    Ace isn't it !!!

    Is it 6pm in the middle east (lets be generic and say that the good lord Jesus was from somewhere in that neck of the woods), they're two hours ahead, so the rapture will happen at 4pm UK time.

    or is it 6pm in California where Harold Camping is from ? In which case that's eight hours behind us, so 10am our time.

    F*ck, I might only have 1hr 12 minutes left !!!!

    So make the most of it and get riding...

    Love n hugs

    DD
    oh yeah 8) :wink:
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 75,661
    freehub wrote:
    The Rapture is an underground complex in the computer game Bioshock and Bioshock 2.

    Underwater....
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    freehub wrote:
    The Rapture is an underground complex in the computer game Bioshock and Bioshock 2.

    Underwater....

    New game? My turn - Underwear.
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • crumbschief
    crumbschief Posts: 3,399
    Tell mum not to go to Iceland.
  • MattC59
    MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    Aggieboy wrote:
    freehub wrote:
    The Rapture is an underground complex in the computer game Bioshock and Bioshock 2.

    Underwater....

    New game? My turn - Underwear.
    Underwire ?
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • The Ors
    The Ors Posts: 130
    Am loving the readers comments on the BBC news site story that 'The Rapture' didn't happen.

    Example:

    "I feel sorry for the Rev Camping; he must be really disappointed that it didn't happen. Still: it's not the end of the world"

    :lol: Brilliant!
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    Underpants.
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • loveaduck
    loveaduck Posts: 48
    How do we know that the Rapture did not happen? Maybe everyone just wasn't worth saving.

    (God knows everything. She is a woman after all ) 8)
    "I love you less than cake, but way more than Marmite!"