DearHolly

cooldad

Dear Holly,
I'm having terrible trouble getting women to sleep with me, even though I have my chat-up technique honed to a fine art. Basically, after I have discretely drawn the woman's attention to my semi-erect manhood by rubbing it slowly with a gloved hand and gesturing towards it with 'come-to-bed' eyes, I then purposefully allow my tongue to trace the outer edges of my lips, perhaps allowing a small stream of spittle to sexily trickle down my chin. I then begin to breathe deeply and heavily like some kind of sexually charged wild animal, all the time sliding closer and closer to to my quarry. Unfortunately, by the time I get within shagging distance, I've been ejected from whichever premises I happen to be in at the time and soon find myself in a frustrated heap by the side of the road. Can you offer any suggestions as to how I evade capture to ensure I finally get the chance to sex a helpless maiden?
Geoffrey
Winchester


Sound familiar? Could Geoffrey really be Sheepsteeth?

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/features/ ... 103163633/

mak3m

i feel unclean

El Capitano

Could be Andy...

Raymondavalon

El Capitano wrote:

Could be Andy...

^^This^^

Aggieboy

cooldad wrote:

Dear Holly,
I'm having terrible trouble getting women to sleep with me, even though I have my chat-up technique honed to a fine art. Basically, after I have discretely drawn the woman's attention to my semi-erect manhood by rubbing it slowly with a gloved hand and gesturing towards it with 'come-to-bed' eyes, I then purposefully allow my tongue to trace the outer edges of my lips, perhaps allowing a small stream of spittle to sexily trickle down my chin. I then begin to breathe deeply and heavily like some kind of sexually charged wild animal, all the time sliding closer and closer to to my quarry. Unfortunately, by the time I get within shagging distance, I've been ejected from whichever premises I happen to be in at the time and soon find myself in a frustrated heap by the side of the road. Can you offer any suggestions as to how I evade capture to ensure I finally get the chance to sex a helpless maiden?
Geoffrey
Winchester


Sound familiar? Could Geoffrey really be Sheepsteeth?

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/features/ ... 103163633/

I think it's an old Michael Jackson letter that's surfaced. They've changed his name to avoid litigation and inserted 'premises' where he'd written 'school'

VWsurfbum

:shock: I thought it was Cooldad making a genuine post?

cooldad

VWsurfbum wrote:

:shock: I thought it was Cooldad making a genuine post?

I do have some sympathy with the writer's situation.

Gazlar

El Capitano wrote:

Could be Andy...

cooldad wrote:

Dear Holly,
I'm having terrible trouble getting women to sleep with me, even though I have my chat-up technique honed to a fine art.

Although, probably not then

sheepsteeth

cooldad wrote:

Sound familiar? Could Geoffrey really be Sheepsteeth?

cooooould beeee.