Any new dads on here? Do you still cycle as much?

badgerman26

So OH is due in June, currently commuting ~14m each way and shower at each end. I rec it adds on 30mins on the journey from driving as not getting changed at start and then after etc. plus quicker journey.

Worried if knackered n having to keep job down whilst getting back as soon as to see the little one n take it off the missus that will not be able to cycle in as much.

Also doubt will be able to Sat or sun rides on my own if at work in the week.

How do you deal with change in priorities?

rjsterry

Mine's 19 months old now, and I probably ride more than I used to to keep travel costs down - about the same distance as you; I live near Croydon but wrk in central London, and a Zone 5 travelcard is £159 a month :shock: - but weekend rides are a distant memory. It is knackering, but after a while you become accustomed to it.

The urge to get home to see the littl'un can improve your commute times, but more seriously, although it's physically tiring, I find a bit of time twice a day to myself helps cope with the stresses of work and everything else, so I'm a bit more sociable when I get home.

prawny

I didn't start commuting by bike until the eldest was born, don't fret. Don't get much chance to ride at the weekends but i'd rather spend time with the kids anyway.

It's tough for the first couple of months with sleep n all but when they start sleepin through the evenings it's a chance to get out of each others hair.

Plus you'll need the petrol money anyway, kids are more expensive than you'd think.

kurako

I ride to work every day. I guess I'm lucky cos it's quicker than the train and way more reliable. No weekend rides though. Not a chance. Never.

badgerman26

Yep good point re money saving rec it's about £1300 gross salary saving not driving with todays diesel prices. Plus I get bike vouchers at work.

I guess will try to work n ride harder to make up the time.

Shame about no go for w/e ride, enjoy the pint at the end. Guess that's out of the window too...

pastryboy

I just about manage to squeeze in a weekend ride if I head off at 6:30am and keep it to a couple of hours at most. If I went any later I'd be eating into the only day we're all at home together.

It's not easy to fit much of anything else in but it's well worth it - at least after the first couple of months when the baby can do slightly more than poo/sick/dribble/tit sucking/cling to Mum and starts becoming a little person interacting with you.

tlw1

I didn't ride much for the first year, but after that I always gave the wife a lie in at the w.end & spent the time with the kids. Then when she got up I would nip off and back for brunch

Nik Cube

Good luck with that my little lad is coming round to 3 and I havnt had a full nights sleep since he came home. I ride 20 miles a day and usually get a ride in on a Sunday morning. In the summer I take him out on my old mtb my wife comes out as well sometimes.

windbreaker

Hah! Try being a single dad! Commutes keep me going and occasionally Saturday runs. The dream of getting back to race form is a distant memory. Still last week 100 miles and what seemed like a bail out on a Saturday run was in fact the fastest since I started using cyclemeter last summer. Worst thing is that I start to feel I get form by June then lose it all when the summer holiday comes and look after my two girls on my own with few breaks i.e. no cycling at all to speak of. Last year I managed a one day MTB course in the summer but the dream of getting back into MTB once again has also faded. My older girl 8 really enjoyed a MTB course at Glentress but I’ve never managed to get there with her since. The younger 5 year-old has no interest in cycling but will sit on the tag-along.
I remember keeping fit hauling the trailer around with them both in up hills.
On the up side now that they are both at school I should mange some runs on Friday mornings when they are both in school and I don’t work. However Dental/medical appointments come around much more often than you’d think.
Did my 46 mile there and back commute on Monday for the first time in almost two years (it was freezing) and paid for it. Have felt crap all week but fought off a full cold. Still hope to get out for a long slow run on Saturday which will do me more good than falling off the back of a chain gang. My aim is do the 46 miles Monday, 13 hour day Tuesday, 30 miles round trip wed and 12 miles Thursday cycle to the train. This together with some Friday am sessions and sat am sessions should mean I don’t disgrace myself too much this year on the Caledonian Etape. My fitness should build well for the end of June to then disappear like snow off a dike!

markshaw77

pastryboy wrote:

I just about manage to squeeze in a weekend ride if I head off at 6:30am and keep it to a couple of hours at most. If I went any later I'd be eating into the only day we're all at home together.

It's not easy to fit much of anything else in but it's well worth it - at least after the first couple of months when the baby can do slightly more than poo/sick/dribble/tit sucking/cling to Mum and starts becoming a little person interacting with you.

^^^^This - although I occasionally make it out for 3.5hrs

I have 3 now and both the commute and weekend rides are doable, but there will always be compromises whether it is going out early/late, letting your OH have some time off from the little 'un or something else.

Also, like rjsterry, I find the time on the bike is some really good "clear the head" time and the fitness benefits sure help as they get older and harder to catch!!

The first few months are always the hardest but once you find a routine, it is about sensible planning and you can still find the time for anything.

SimonAH

Kids bring loads of little pleasures ant turn all your other little pleasures to sh1t. Back in from the workshop now to face the rapist (she wants number two). :shock:

bigmat

Probably ride a bit less than before I had the nipper, but still commute as just as quick as public transport and saves money. I get out for a fair few weekend rides. Try not to take the p*ss too much but my wife appreciates its what I love so she's pretty good about it. Its the age old not enough hours in the day issue - come the weekend I really want to spend time with the family but its also the only chance I have to get out properly on my bike. I generally manage to strike a fair balance I think, and Marmotte training is more or less on schedule so far. It'll be easier when the days start getting longer as I'll probably go out a couple of nights a week when the little fella is in bed. Come August when number 2 arrives things might get a bit more complicated...

bartimaeus

I'm not a commuter... but for fun riding get some lights and go out in the dark once the kids are asleep (that is once they sleep through ). My kids are now 8 and 11... all last year I'd be heading out around 9pm one or two evenings a week.

cjcp

What the guys above say.

I've got two kids. The commutes keep me sane, and that "me" time is important. It's not the same "me" time as going on a weekend ride, mind, as you are still commuting.

I went on my first club run in January for over two years, but I'm the exception rather than the rule. Am training for the Marmotte, too, but I post in Commuting, not so much in the "Training" or "Race" sections of the Road forum...

As Mat says, don't take the p!ss. The OH will get very tired, narky (very probably irrational from your POV) and may suggest "weekend rules" i.e. from Friday night until Sunday night, the kid's yours. If you're proactive in suggesting that she should have a lie-in on the weekend so you take the little 'un out in the pram, or in the afternoon when the OH may want a nap, you might find you're brownie point stock rise just enough to buy you some riding time.

And analyse the little one's sleep pattern on the weekend asap - if s/he sleeps from say 7-10am, you could get a 1.5-2hr ride in and tell your wife you'll be back in time to prepare any bottles etc for when the kid wakes up. Ditto if it sleeps for a bit in the afternoon. If you anticipate it's sleep pattern, you can prepare your kit the night before to save you time in the morning.

I found it gets gradually easier to get out after they're two - they're just a bit more independent then and not quite as a hard work. Of course, the plan is reset if a second child comes along!

Running is a good stress reliever - get more bang for buck with a 30-min run. Not that I do that any more.

And a turbo mightn't be a bad idea, for the same reason. This I do.

Good luck!

rjsterry

cjcp wrote:

And analyse the little one's sleep pattern on the weekend asap - if s/he sleeps from say 7-10am, you could get a 1.5-2hr ride in and tell your wife you'll be back in time to prepare any bottles etc for when the kid wakes up. Ditto if it sleeps for a bit in the afternoon. If you anticipate it's sleep pattern, you can prepare your kit the night before to save you time in the morning.

Sorry, a sleep pattern you say? Well that's an interesting theory...

Greg T

My wife swears by this:

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

And Bianchi does sleep very well . . . .

As for riding.......

Weekends - ha ha ha ha ha

Robstar24

mine is 9 months old now, i commute to work 20 miles each way, so that's 180 miles a week.

i try (read try, i don't always succeed) to get one ride in at the weekend. I have an arrangement with my wife that we each have a chunk of a day at the weekend (ie morning, afternoon - i would say evening but the little guy is in bed in evening) to ourselves. so i try to get a decent ride in by leaving the house at say, 8am and getting back for 12, which works quite well. 8am on a weekend really isn't early at all with babies.

it helps to be organised, so get your bike and kit ready the night before, drinks bottles and food ready etc, and sort out a route where you know approximately how long it will take, with some margin for error.

club runs are out the window now, given time constraints there's no way i can do the roll up casually at 9.45 am for a 10am start routine anymore.

i did one sportive when mr junior robstar was 2 weeks old (it was flatout in the fens, i'd booked it months before he came along and he was born a month early anyway), and a few races at weekends (living a 20 minute drive from hillingdon circuit has its plusses).

riding is a lot harder with kids, but it's only for a few years. good luck!

gtvlusso

badgerman26 wrote:

So OH is due in June, currently commuting ~14m each way and shower at each end. I rec it adds on 30mins on the journey from driving as not getting changed at start and then after etc. plus quicker journey.

Worried if knackered n having to keep job down whilst getting back as soon as to see the little one n take it off the missus that will not be able to cycle in as much.

Also doubt will be able to Sat or sun rides on my own if at work in the week.

How do you deal with change in priorities?

Yup, gtvlusso jnr mark 3 is 12 months old.

We consolidated down to one car - so I have to cycle to work and back daily. It is 10 miles, but my wife *allows* me to add a bit more to it occasionally to make up for a lack of weekend cycling. At first she was bonkers about me being home "on time", but the nature of my job does not allow that to happen - she has reluctantly come around to this as we practically live on my salary only. But I don't take the pee and agree everything up front - she only gets shirty if I am home after 6pm....which takes some doing if I leave at 5:30pm! I mitigate the work stuff by beaing in the office very early in the morning.

It is knackering, especially when jnr does not sleep - all 3 kids and the dog are up too! Some mornings are a killer and sometimes I don't get a chance to shower until midday - nature of my job....

In terms of priorities: I dumped racing and weekend ride last year and have binned most for this year, although I am allowed a few weekend races/sportives. I have not been out for a beer with my mates for about a year.

My goal was to do the etape in 2012 - my wife is cool with this as it means a nice family holiday in France and we have a deal that she can go back to rowing at weekends.

Key word here is "compromise" and explain how you feel about something - don't hide away afraid to say something to her.

Robstar24

agree also with other posters that the first 3 months are hardest, after that he became a real joy, smiling, interacting and everything.

plus, don't let the first 2 weeks lull you into a false sense of security, they sleep all the time then but it doesn't last!

depends also what your wife/other half thinks of it, my wife is always keen for me to be very involved and i help out a lot round the house, whereas I've heard of some mums who basically won't let go of the baby ever, even for the dad, and kick the dad out of the marital bed so they can co-sleep with baby

SBezza

I didn't start cycling until my little lad was 2 ish, but I still go out for weekend rides, it just means that during the week, or when I am not riding I look after him more, and give my wife time to do her things.

It basically is a bit of give and take, it gets alot easier as they get older mind you. I do alot of my training on the commute home, and still get home before my wife and little boy most of the time. Then again my wife works full time as well so she is not sitting at home all day.

Greg T

Robstar24 wrote:

agree also with other posters that the first 3 months are hardest, after that he became a real joy, smiling, interacting and everything.

It might become a real joy . . .

However you could have rough time with a colicy, refluxy unwell and mainly screaming bundle of non joy......

crazy88

Like most on here, I don't cycle as much now we have a little one. However, i still keep my daily commute as it saves a lot of money and is just as fast. Weekend riding is a rarity for me now also, I've managed once this year so far.

The wife goes to Zumba dancing thingy once a week which I use as my time to tinker with my bikes. I love it, and really like knowing that each thursday I have time to play. I'd go crazy if I couldn't get out on the bike for commuting though.

Oh, and as for sleeping. Our little girl was a right turd at first, she slept about 7 hours in every 24, so was really hard going. But she just got better and better as she got older. She now goes down at 7-8 and we don't hear a peep until 7-8 next morning. (She's been that good since about 8 months old).

antlaff

i'm a father to 8 with the oldest coming 12. Riding about 100-120miles/week at the moment but will up this with the longer days as I can get up at dawn before the kids get up, and do 40miles and still be back for breakfast etc.Then get out a bit in the evenings when the babies have gone to bed.
The OH runs a lot but we both find the time to do what we want and still have the w/ends free for the kids.

We just skip sleeping!!!

edhornby

Congratulations DDD :-) my firstborn is now 3months old and it's starting to get less manic now

commuting will be an issue only if you require post commute recovery at the moment - if you don't you'll just need to be on the ball about stowing the bike, changing quick and doing childcare, this will be ok I reckon

weekends are limited and you have to get creative about when you ride, booked well in advance :-) one thing I do is follow the car to parent visits, get everything ready in advance, set off slightly earlier than mrs Ed and we arrive at the same time

flicksta

To continue on a theme......

I have a one year old and although I still commute for the 4 days a week I am in the office by bike, weekend cycling has become a rarity. We've got another due in 3 months which won't make much difference to the commuting, but will mean my weekends really are looking after the little ones.

That said, given my boy is now one, he's just got his first bike seat and helmet and tomorrow, weather permitting, will see his first trip out on the back of my bike. Can't wait.

Thing is, although I miss cycling, I want to hang out with my boy at the weekends, it's awesome taking him swimming, on walks etc. As they get older and do more activities themselves, cycling will make much more of a reapparance I'm sure.

edhornby

"Goodbye to this life, for. full of care,
you will have no time to stand and stare"

apologies WH davies ;-)

clarkey cat

Have a read of this book. Its about a cat 1 who has to come to terms with having kids and family... I read it last year and its really good. Its only short so you can flick through it in a couple of hours. Bit sad though


http://www.amazon.co.uk/Escape-Artist-L ... 1841151041

smithy21

I probably cycle about the same. Little girl now 2. One ride at the weekend is a given although I will have to get up early to do it. Dont commute in the week as the missus banned me from it after passing out on the roadside once.

I have a turbo and will also get to the gym/do spin sessions in the week to keep up the fitness. Its all about managing time and making the most of it. In the summer months I will try to get an hour in Richmond Park before going to work.

One extra bonus has been a couple of the guys in our NCT group cycle with me at the weekend sometimes so the other halves generally meet up if we go for a long one. Cant promise you will be that lucky if you do NCT.

King Donut

My little girl is just coming up to 4 months. Hasn't interrupted the commute too much. Just the odd sleepless night that causes me to bail on the train. I really appreciate the evenings with them both so I always take the shortest route home.

Weekend rides are no problem either, just a matter of organising it a bit more in advance and be flexible.

I drink far less.

I run a lot more.

If all else fails I remind the wife it was she that wanted the thing in the first place.

rjsterry

smithy21 wrote:

I probably cycle about the same. Little girl now 2. One ride at the weekend is a given although I will have to get up early to do it. Dont commute in the week as the missus banned me from it after passing out on the roadside once.

I have a turbo and will also get to the gym/do spin sessions in the week to keep up the fitness. Its all about managing time and making the most of it. In the summer months I will try to get an hour in Richmond Park before going to work.

One extra bonus has been a couple of the guys in our NCT group cycle with me at the weekend sometimes so the other halves generally meet up if we go for a long one. Cant promise you will be that lucky if you do NCT.

Eh? What's the logic behind that?

Mrs RJS meets up with other mums - not NCT, but a group set up originally by our GP surgery - during the week quite a bit and as we had just moved to a new area, this was a lifesaver for her. Unfortunately I don't think any of the other dads cycle.

Greg T

King Donut wrote:

If all else fails I remind the wife it was she that wanted the thing in the first place.

Now . . .

That is a conversation I have had with Mrs DeadEyeBumHole in my head a number of times . . . Never quite gets vocalised though as she would fecking kill me......

She would actually kill me