Where do you take a gal for a second date?

disquieting_museeuws

No lewd answers please!

Since this place seems to have several experts on building relationships, perhaps you could give me some advice

My new friend refuses to tell me what she wants to do this weekend (a woman's prerogative I guess). We don't know each other much having only had a coffee together - should we go for a quiet meal to get to know each other a bit more? On the other hand she's keen on local music and there are a few local pub gigs in her town (as there are nice restaurants as well), would she prefer that, I wonder?

She's going to a concert tonight, and is also going (or has been) to the cinema recently so didn't seem keen on that.

I feel like I'm being tested a bit, perhaps I'm over-thinking the whole thing :oops:

spinndrift

LBS, meal and then a gig - worked for me 14 years ago.

-spider-

LBS is essential. Start as you mean to go on.

TuckerUK

I like to cook her a meal indoors. But bear in mind I have only ever dated people I already knew something about (and they me), so the trust/safety aspect wasn't an issue.

Smokin Joe

Up the ar$e.

*BTW, what does "lewd" mean?"

Homer J

Smokin Joe wrote:

Up the ar$e.

*BTW, what does "lewd" mean?"

:roll:

Clearly you take her from behind first. Lewd is a small village up north.

disquieting_museeuws

TuckerUK wrote:

I like to cook her a meal indoors. But bear in mind I have only ever dated people I already knew something about (and they me), so the trust/safety aspect wasn't an issue.

Yes, would rather be out in public out of respect as much as anything (although the restraining orders have run out and I've paid my debts to society)

Aggieboy

disquieting_museeuws wrote:

No lewd answers please!

Since this place seems to have several experts on building relationships, perhaps you could give me some advice

My new friend refuses to tell me what she wants to do this weekend (a woman's prerogative I guess). We don't know each other much having only had a coffee together - should we go for a quiet meal to get to know each other a bit more? On the other hand she's keen on local music and there are a few local pub gigs in her town (as there are nice restaurants as well), would she prefer that, I wonder?

She's going to a concert tonight, and is also going (or has been) to the cinema recently so didn't seem keen on that.

I feel like I'm being tested a bit, perhaps I'm over-thinking the whole thing :oops:

Don't over complicate it is my advice. She's already agreed to a second date after all. As you know she likes music I'd go for that. Quiet drink early doors, listen to the band and whatever you both decide after.

PS. If you're another one taking the 'dog (tm) out, don't forget she likes "extra meat"

disquieting_museeuws

Aggieboy wrote:

Don't over complicate it is my advice. She's already agreed to a second date after all. As you know she likes music I'd go for that. Quiet drink early doors, listen to the band and whatever you both decide after.

PS. If you're another one taking the 'dog (tm) out, don't forget she likes "extra meat"

Thanks for your thoughts. The other lady is well OOML, I'm sure!

DIESELDOG

PS. If you're another one taking the 'dog (tm) out, don't forget she likes "extra meat"[/quote]

second date?

trip to the clinic?

love n hugs

DD

Slack

What on earth is 'LBS'?

Informal dinner somewhere not too posh, but certainly not grungy. Try make it near one of the gig locations, so if it's going well, you can go on afterwards.

Most importantly though, do what you would want to do. If that doesn't work for her, then you'll find out if there is any potential for some sort of relationship.

dennisn

Anywhere that my wife, or any of her friends, won't see us.

Ginjafro

Thank God your not having relationship problems and daft enough to ask for our advice....
Seriously though start at the LBS before second base.

disquieting_museeuws

Slack wrote:

What on earth is 'LBS'?

Informal dinner somewhere not too posh, but certainly not grungy. Try make it near one of the gig locations, so if it's going well, you can go on afterwards.

Most importantly though, do what you would want to do. If that doesn't work for her, then you'll find out if there is any potential for some sort of relationship.

'Local Bike Shop'. She does have a bike, bless her.

Good idea, keep the options open. She told me she doesn't like tripe, perhaps that was a clue!

ride_whenever

I disagree on the gig thing, way too easy to go wildly off the rails if she hates it and if it isn't something you enjoy then you're misrepresenting yourself.

She's given you the choice explicitly, so don't go outside your comfort zone in an effort to please her, she probably wants to find out a bit more about your passions. I'd go out for dinner somewhere quiet, maybe with live music, because even if it's a disaster then you can laugh about the bad food and awful music.

After dinner do something that you want to do (not the lbs, although that'd be good for a romantic candlelight dinner :twisted: ) maybe an art gallery or some sort of adventure activity. Something that isn't necessarily that familiar to her but you can be knowledgeable,and hopefully she'll come to enjoy.


That said, this is just my 2p, and obviously you need to play it according to the sort of person she seems to be.

Aggieboy

PS. If you're another one taking the 'dog (tm) out, don't forget she likes "extra meat"[/quote]

second date?

trip to the clinic?

love n hugs

DD



"Not quite got the hang of ths quoting lark pet have you?"

mrushton

LBS might not be her thing. Remember a friend of mine taking his wife to the local drum shop (he and I play drums) and she was bored in 1 min. Anyway, if you can cook then that's good - something nice a roast dinner or if you have to,go out a decent Indian meal? Look out for special offers esp in a city. Manchester has places like Tampopo and Wasabi which if you girl hasn't had asian or japanese food are great esp. as neither are expensive. Gigs are good if you both like the music.

MaxwellBygraves

ride_whenever wrote:

I disagree on the gig thing, way too easy to go wildly off the rails if she hates it and if it isn't something you enjoy then you're misrepresenting yourself.
.

+1 Don't do the gig, that's what she would do if she was choosing, do something you would like to do. Ride whenever is right, the gig is too easy to go wrong.

DIESELDOG

touche aggie!!

Love n hugs

DD

disquieting_museeuws

MaxwellBygraves wrote:

ride_whenever wrote:

I disagree on the gig thing, way too easy to go wildly off the rails if she hates it and if it isn't something you enjoy then you're misrepresenting yourself.
.

+1 Don't do the gig, that's what she would do if she was choosing, do something you would like to do. Ride whenever is right, the gig is too easy to go wrong.

Hmm, interesting - a loud gig can make communication stressful as well, I think.

We have loads of interests in common (including the cultural stuff recognised by 'Ride'), I just hope we get to do some of them together. Part of the point of 'dating' her is to find someone I really like after a string of more casual liaisons.

mattshrops

dont take ANY notice of ANYTHING ANYONE says on here.(except for me of course :? )

for every person that says left theres another saying right. do what feels right. do something nice but dont go over the top. desperation is not attractive(not that im saying your desperate :oops: )

good luck(and thank god i dont have to do the dating thing)

disquieting_museeuws

mattshrops wrote:

dont take ANY notice of ANYTHING ANYONE says on here.(except for me of course :? )

for every person that says left theres another saying right. do what feels right. do something nice but dont go over the top. desperation is not attractive(not that im saying your desperate :oops: )

good luck(and thank god i dont have to do the dating thing)

HaHa, yes, I take your point of course (or do I?). The fact that our first meeting went about x100 better than I hoped means that we'll probably sort ourselves out whatever we decide to do