FAO anyone...

projectsome
projectsome Posts: 4,478
edited September 2010 in The Crudcatcher
I'm bored! practically falling asleep!!! :D post some jokes, :evil: can't watch vids at work
FARKBOOK TWATTER Happiness is my fucking mood!

Comments

  • psymon
    psymon Posts: 1,562
    whats worse than a bul in a china shop.....













    a hedgehog in a condom factory.
  • psymon
    psymon Posts: 1,562
    2 nuns in a bath, one says
    where's the soap
    the other says
    it rarther doesnt it.
  • psymon
    psymon Posts: 1,562
    Admin - No Aristocrats, this is a family forum. Cheers.
  • psymon wrote:
    A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter
    TRUNCATED
    And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"


    :lol::lol::lol:
    FARKBOOK TWATTER Happiness is my fucking mood!
  • As a family we're trying 2 keep up with technology.. So I bought my son an iPod, my daughter an iPhone and myself an iPad. I felt sorry 4 the wife so I bought her an iRon and that's when it all fuckin kicked off. What an ungrateful biatch. !
    "I ride to eat"
  • Gazlar
    Gazlar Posts: 8,084
    I walked past a poster this morning it said "COUNTDOWN, THE MUSICAL"

    I thought that must be a play on words

    I'm currently dating a couple of supermodels, two birds, one stone
    Mountain biking is like sex.......more fun when someone else is getting hurt
    Amy
    Farnsworth
    Zapp
  • Gazlar
    Gazlar Posts: 8,084
    I got a text earlier from my sister, it said I want you inside me now. It was a mistake, she had meant to send it to her boyfriend, but I didn't find out until it was too late.

    Just kidding

    It was an answerphone message
    Mountain biking is like sex.......more fun when someone else is getting hurt
    Amy
    Farnsworth
    Zapp
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple?
















































































    rape.
  • 77ric
    77ric Posts: 601
    edited September 2010
    i fancied a curry last night, so i phoned "king's china buffet"

    "herro, i'm wan king the cook" came the reply

    "no worries i'll call back" i replied

    badoom cha

    what's the difference between a rottweiler and a poodle?

    if a rottweiler starts humping your leg, let it finish

    badoom cha

    I remember watching rooney in the world cup and thinking, you couldn't score in a brothel.

    just shows how much i know about football…


    badoom cha

    and finally


    i opened a tub of margarine the day and in it was the face of allah, so i showed it to an indian friend, he said… i can't believe it's not buddha!



    badoom cha

    ah thank you, and goodnight, i'm here every night
    Fancy a brew?
  • psymon
    psymon Posts: 1,562
    ooops!!!!!!!

    didnt occur to me as i copy/pasted that joke that it is basically filled with filth! :oops:

    trouble is this doesnt feel like a family forum.
    more a kind of communal venting toilet.
  • 77ric
    77ric Posts: 601
    psymon wrote:
    ooops!!!!!!!

    didnt occur to me as i copy/pasted that joke that it is basically filled with filth! :oops:

    trouble is this doesnt feel like a family forum.
    more a kind of communal venting toilet.

    just as well jay12 didn't see it, or his fragile little mind would be corrupted! :lol:
    Fancy a brew?
  • I've got a joke...











    women's rights
  • 77ric wrote:
    i fancied a curry last night, so i phoned "king's china buffet"

    "herro, i'm wan king the cook" came the reply

    "no worries i'll call back" i replied

    On a similar serious(ish) note i have a friend who owns a restauraunt, called Kevin Wan. At his restauraunt they serve 'Wan King Prawns' :lol::lol:
  • ^^^LOL
  • I was shagging my misus the other day when I felt a tap on my shoulder.
    I hate fucking in the bath.
    08 Pitch Pro
    14 Kona Unit
    Kona Kula SS
    Trailstar SS
    94 Univega Alpina 5.3
  • How do you know when someones got an iPhone?

    They tell you.
    08 Pitch Pro
    14 Kona Unit
    Kona Kula SS
    Trailstar SS
    94 Univega Alpina 5.3
  • Jenny Frost stopped me in the street- shows me a picture of a feaky girl and said-
    "Snog, Marry or Avoid"

    I said rape.

    She said thats not an option.

    I said "For you its not."
    08 Pitch Pro
    14 Kona Unit
    Kona Kula SS
    Trailstar SS
    94 Univega Alpina 5.3