My New Road Traffic Laws

spen666

When I become dictator of the universe, it will be time to introduce some minor traffic laws:


1. Every road must have at least 1 bus lane in each direction. If there is insufficient room for a bus lane and a normal lane, then the bus lane takes precedence and other traffic will have to go another route

2. To ease congestion in bus lanes, the following are banned from using any bus lanes: buses, coaches, motor bikes, taxis and any other form of motorised traffic

Two simple laws changes are hardly too much to introduce are they?

Blue Meanie

Also,

Rain on Tuesdays, Thursdays guaranteed dry.

SimonAH

And whilst we're at it, nobody may be permitted a car (or any larger vehicle) license without first spending a minimum of a year riding a small motorcycle with low power and skinny tyres. At least that way they will be forced to gain a rudimentary understanding of hazard perception before climbing aboard an armoured car.

lost_in_thought

I think they should start with a bicycle and work up to a 1 litre car.

invincible

no my law would be everyone would have to cycle to work.

unless involved in delivering support or supplies to cyclists & they are limited to 10mph

ndru

1) Close central London for traffic 7am - 23 pm

And work up from there.

essexian

Numpty Cam

I would like to see a “Numpty Cam” installed in all new vehicles and retro fitted in all older cars during their MOT.

This Numpty Cam would started recording a forward and rear view every time the car is started. This recording would then be downloaded to a central bureau after every trip and on a set number of times per year, this recording would be viewed for any traffic infringements. Any found would result ina penalty for each offence being issued to the driver. There would also be a camera in car to show who the driver is.

The recordings would automatically be downloaded to a urgent viewing file in cases of accident or when a cyclist or ped pushes a bright yellow button on the car to do so when the need arises. Perhaps a remote control could be built into the braking system of bikes to save having to touch the car.

Any driver who disables the Numpty Cam would find that an automatic error notice is raised and their insurance would be invalidated. The police would also be notified who would seize and crush the vehicle (and perhaps the driver).

Okay, perhaps we aren’t there just yet with technology but we will be when I rule the world…..

bails87

Or Clarkson's idea of the spike on the steering wheel.

asprilla

bails87 wrote:

Or Clarkson's idea of the spike on the steering wheel.

I quite like this; quickest way to reduce car accidents is to replace airbags with sharp metal spikes. You'd see a sharp rise in fatalities, but it would soon trail off to almost nothing.

notsoblue

I'd put cameras at ASL's and have automatic fines for vehicles that stop in them.

Dudu

spen666 wrote:

When I become dictator of the universe, it will be time to introduce some minor traffic laws:


1. Every road must have at least 1 bus lane in each direction. If there is insufficient room for a bus lane and a normal lane, then the bus lane takes precedence and other traffic will have to go another route

2. To ease congestion in bus lanes, the following are banned from using any bus lanes: buses, coaches, motor bikes, taxis and any other form of motorised traffic

Two simple laws changes are hardly too much to introduce are they?

+1

Almost identical to the improvements I'll make after my hordes have laid waste to capitalism.

mtb-idle

I will ban all mobile phones, ipod's, MP3 players, laptops and radios and any other electronic device that i haven't listed but you will think of from inside the M25.

the commuting world will be a much safer place.

Gussio

Use of D-locks in any capacity to be 100% defensible in a court of law.

Blue Meanie

Airbags on the outside to protect who you've hit, not yourself.

Ban 'full beam', can't see? Slow down.

Grass over car-parks, can't park? Don't drive.

Ooh, the list goes on...

But, I pity the poor drivers;
They bought a 'sexy' car and they can't fit in it.
They never see/feel the turn of the seasons.

wulfhound

No privately owned vehicle may have a roof. No more isolating yourself from your surroundings in your tin box with your Michael Bolton CDs. It's raining, or cold? Wear a coat, numpty. It's a rough area? You drive through it every day, maybe it's time you started giving a damn about the people that have to live there.

Jay dubbleU

Motorways closed to cars - for use by bicycles on

All motorised vehicles limited to 10mph and preceded by a man on a bicycle carrying a red flag - see what I did there - road safety and unemployment issues solved at the same time

deptfordmarmoset

Blue Meanie wrote:

Airbags on the outside to protect who you've hit, not yourself.

I especially like this one. Though I'm generous enough to allow airbags on the inside provided there are equivalent airbags on the outside. It would establish a principle of proportionality: my safety is counterbalanced by an equal consideration for others' safety.

(Have I got this wrong? Isn't it a principle of H & S legislation that you have both a responsibility for your own safety and others? Why is this not a principle for safety in car design?)