Would you want one of these?

bones3027
bones3027 Posts: 152
edited August 2010 in MTB general
Found this whilst surfing last night. Thought it was a joke but after further investigation I think I want one( I'm military ) http://www.militarybikes.com/index.html

Comments

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    No, why would you want one?
    I never liked the fully suspended Klein Mantras first time round, now they've removed the URT rear suspension and turned it into a folding bike, I want it even less.
  • Hmm, it says

    "The Paratrooper® is a full size, 24 speed mountain bike designed to endure any terrain at high speed in silence with no heat signature."

    But I see it has a chain and gears, so it'll certainly not be silent.

    Surely it'd be better off with a belt drive and hub gears.

    Would work better in varied conditions (Desert particularly), require less maintainence. Be less noisy, and there's less chance of snapping a mech.

    MOD, if you're reading this, I'll let you have this one for free. All future design ideas will cost you.
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Nah, what you need is a Marin full suss frame. No chainstays to cause chain rattle :wink:
    Then stick a stinger on it to prevent any further chain flappingnessissity.
    Then run a shimano hub, so it doesn't clickity clack.
    Then paint it black.

    Not, that I'm a government hired ninja or anything :wink:






    :lol:
  • Nah, what you need is a Marin full suss frame. No chainstays to cause chain rattle :wink:
    Then stick a stinger on it to prevent any further chain flappingnessissity.
    Then run a shimano hub, so it doesn't clickity clack.
    Then paint it black.

    Not, that I'm a government hired ninja or anything :wink:






    :lol:

    Yeh, but then you'd not be able to find a plane powerful enough to shift it :wink:











    Joke
  • Ahh...a Klein Mantra, I knew that pile of pigshit reminded me of something.
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Yeh, but then you'd not be able to find a plane powerful enough to shift it :wink:
    Ah, but we have.
    I mean, I have.
    I mean, they have.




    Er,...
    I mean, you're right :lol:
  • Could be worse, it could come fitted with an Atlas crank. They'd be able to hear you coming for miles around with that thing creaking and cracking away :P
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Or an orange 5 :lol:
  • 77ric
    77ric Posts: 601
    it's a re/de/un-branded hummer MTB, looked like shit then.

    hummer-bike-xtreme.jpg

    still looks like shit now
    Fancy a brew?
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    77ric wrote:
    it's a re/de/un-branded hummer MTB, looked like shoot then.
    still looks like shoot now
    Which in turn was essentially a rebadged slightly modded mantra.
    mantra3.jpg
  • darren555
    darren555 Posts: 194
    I could just imagine a whole regiment being wiped out because one trooper decided to fit a Hope hub :shock:
  • Raymondavalon
    Raymondavalon Posts: 5,346
    Darren555 wrote:
    I could just imagine a whole regiment being wiped out because one trooper decided to fit a Hope hub :shock:
    :D:D:D
  • sdalby
    sdalby Posts: 139
    I actually know someone who's got one of these. I've never looked at it closely as i just thought it was a standard piece of Halfords crap.
    Never put off until tomorrow something that you can do today. 'Cause if you do it today, and like it, the you can do it again tomorrow!!
  • Mr Wu
    Mr Wu Posts: 1,238
    Imagine the shame of actually being captured on one of these?

    You end up on Jillalabad tv with the usual ak47 wielding American spin doctor, sorry I mean Muslim extremist, the flag in the background, you sat there wondering if the short back and sides is comming..... Then they all turn and look at you, and laugh, laugh so hard that you've been caught on something so bad, they would rather travel by a three legged donkey.

    Fuk that. I'd rather walk.
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Well, if it fills it's intended purpose, then fine. I dare say the bike I started out with wasn't that good.
  • captainfly
    captainfly Posts: 1,001
    A folding mountain bike for paratroopers is an excellent idea, compared to marching into battle the speed and energy expeniture gains make so much sense. But they do have to be somewhat disposable and come in at a certain budget, think WW2 glider than Blackhawk helicopter :wink:
    -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    Mongoose Teocali
    Giant STP0

    Why are MTB economics; spend twice as much as you intended, but only half as much as you wish you could afford? :roll:
  • Shaggy_Dog
    Shaggy_Dog Posts: 688
    One of the reasons the Japanese army made such rapid progress through China was because every soldier was issued with a bicycle so they could cover large distances with lots of kit, when the tyres punctured they just removed them, the sound of 500 bare rims on gravel roads sounded like oncoming tanks, a lot of Chinese soldiers legged it.
    I had to beat them to death with their own shoes...
    HiFi Pro Carbon '09

    LTS DH '96

    The Mighty Dyna-Sore - The 90's?
  • What tyres for war?