I'm a sweary git
whyamihere
Posts: 7,702
As some of you may have noticed, I enjoy a good swearing session.
The noisy chav arseholes apparently having a garden party over the fence from my house, however, take it to a whole new level. I have honestly just heard a sentence used which consisted purely of swear words, and the meaning seemed to be understood by the others.
Normally, I'd be quite impressed by this display of linguistic brilliance. Unfortunately, there's a problem. I live in Birmingham. These are Brummy chavs. And the Brummy chav accent is one of the most grating things known to man. I can hear them clearly through a closed window.
Help me.
The noisy chav arseholes apparently having a garden party over the fence from my house, however, take it to a whole new level. I have honestly just heard a sentence used which consisted purely of swear words, and the meaning seemed to be understood by the others.
Normally, I'd be quite impressed by this display of linguistic brilliance. Unfortunately, there's a problem. I live in Birmingham. These are Brummy chavs. And the Brummy chav accent is one of the most grating things known to man. I can hear them clearly through a closed window.
Help me.
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Comments
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It's tempting, but the trees in their garden do a brilliant job of keeping direct sun off my window and so keeping my room cool.
I think a high powered sniper rifle is the way to go.0 -
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What part of brum mate? (so i can get a grasp of what kinda chavies they are)0
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i once heard a royal irish ranger refer to a problem he was having with his weapon system as:
this fucking fucker's fucking fucked.
i didnt really know what to do with that information.
he must be the sweariest man in NATO.0 -
Selly Oak/Harborne.Mynameisdann wrote:What part of brum mate? (so i can get a grasp of what kinda chavies they are)0 -
They've turned music on.
I'm about to go to the nearest garage for a milk bottle full of petrol and an old rag. If I'm not on here for a while, someone get me a good lawyer.0 -
ive heard sugar in the fuel will make it less dangerous for the recipient.0
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sheepsteeth wrote:ive heard sugar in the fuel will make it less dangerous for the recipient.
I can concur, that I have also heard this.0 -
dot 5.1 over their motor or would that be taking it abit far?0
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Ok, they're now listening to the Jackson 5.
What the shitty fuck?0 -
Mynameisdann wrote:dot 5.1 over their motor or would that be taking it abit far?
compared to petrol bombs?
nah, sounds like a reasonable escalation.0 -
Heh true what was i thinking, your discussing Ira tactics and im thinking a bit of brake fluid is crossing the line
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whyamihere wrote:Ok, they're now listening to the Jackson 5.
What the shitty fuck?
Jackson 5 = Good0 -
Mynameisdann wrote:Heh true what was i thinking, your discussing Ira tactics and im thinking a bit of brake fluid is crossing the line
i think that makes you a better person than me :?0 -
+ 1001 posts reset by the cruel cruel moderators!
Giant Trance X4 (2010)
Giant SCR 02 (2006)0 -
do you have really loud speakers? or maybe a very loud amp IIRC you have a guitar of two. so how about a loud music play off between chavs and you?0
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Problem with that is if he decides to take further action it might be to obvious as to who has *f*cked their sh*t up* if he retaliates with music0
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Common phrase in Caernarfon... "Fukcing hell, I'm fukcing fukced, c*nt"sheepsteeth wrote:i once heard a royal irish ranger refer to a problem he was having with his weapon system as:
this fucking fucker's fucking fucked.
i didnt really know what to do with that information.
he must be the sweariest man in NATO.0 -
If it was the middle of the day, I would have absolutely no problem with introducing them to some of Anal Cunt's greatest hits (yep, they're a real band, look them up), mayhbe some Cannibal Corpse, but I'm slightly too considerate of my neighbours to do it now.jay12 wrote:do you have really loud speakers? or maybe a very loud amp IIRC you have a guitar of two. so how about a loud music play off between chavs and you?0 -
you have to be subtle. dont let em know its you. they probs dont have jobs so can screw you over whilst your out.
ive got 2 bloody loud dogs that howl and bang through a dog door all day a couple of doors down. im gonna anonymous letter em saying, do something or i'll get council/police involved or worse i'll take my own actions.
1. open gate and let em run off
2. doggie treat laced with sleeping tablets0 -
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sheepsteeth wrote:
Cemetery Rapist runs them close though, surely? if not that, then he Must win best album title ever
I'll stress now - i'm not a fan, more fascinated that this is a genre. with fans.0 -
that is truly epic, im going to name my next pet after that album title!!!0
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pretend you already have and it got loose, then stick up a load of "Have You Seen..." posters on the neighbourhood lamp posts. and the school gates if you want to nod to the other title i s'pose..0
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Did you know there's a band called "suck me, fcuk me, call me Helen"?
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good lord, there's loads of these bands! http://www.last.fm/tag/pornogrind/artists?page=1
what an odd night in the pub it must be when someone slurs "tell you what, right, we'll start a band, right, it'll be heavy as f*ck, yeah, and we'll call ourselves Vaginal Chicken" and gets hi-5s all round.
that must've been toward the end of a heavy sesh...0
