Poncey tv cooking

Frank the tank

TV chef "I have some onions here which I've caramalised".

NOOOOOOO!!!

You've bloody well burnt the onions you to55er. :roll:

One mans caramallised is another mans burnt.

I like the bottom of my "bubble and squeek" burnt, sorry, caramalised.

Cleat Eastwood

Whats get me is that on these shows they describe the wine as fruity with a hint of burnt toast and rubber....What?????

If thats its big selling point why dont we see it on the label Chateu de Plimsol avec Old Newspaper Cuttings and Tramps sock. They are poncey.

Sirius631

Don't get me started on drizzling olive oil over stuff. If I went out on a ride in a drizzle like that I'd be drowned. What they're doing is pooring!

rick_chasey

Caramelised: Caramelization (caramelisation) is the oxidation of sugar, a process used extensively in cooking for the resulting nutty flavor and brown color.

Burn: destroy by fire or heat; "They burned the house and his diaries"


Seems the issue isn't with poncy cooking, but with poncy words, on part of the viewer.

Frank the tank

I think you'd have all on discriminating between some onions Anthony Worrel Thompson has "caramalised" and some onions I've burnt.

Sirius631

Apparently, by browning off onions their taste is made sweeter.

rick_chasey

Sirius631 wrote:

Apparently, by browning off onions their taste is made sweeter.

Perhaps because the sugar in the onion becomes oxidised?

deptfordmarmoset

Caramelise is fine because that's what happens. Drizzling your olive oil, however, is complete tosspottery. Drizzle doesn't come down in a continuous gloop.

Aggieboy

You're living in the past, cooking tasty food, with good ingredients, is the way forward. Can't write anymore, I'm off to make a jus and a some julienne vegetables.

buddha

What I don't get is foam. It just looks like someone's gobbed on your dinner :?

markmod

Yes that what foam is... Send a steak back as under or over done, and you will find that the chef adds a foam to it for you

outofbreath2

Cleat Eastwood wrote:

Whats get me is that on these shows they describe the wine as fruity with a hint of burnt toast and rubber....What?????

If thats its big selling point why dont we see it on the label Chateu de Plimsol avec Old Newspaper Cuttings and Tramps sock. They are poncey.

Cats pee in a gooseberry bush is my favourite.

tgardi

I have yet to experience a "whoosh of hollyhocks" and "a miriad of chocolate notes" from any bottle of wine i have ever glugged!!

My criteria :- how much is it? (under a fiver)
Is it over 13% (very important)

If my wine tasted of a Mars bar I'd be pretty freaked out !

Anonymous

Emperors new clothes.

I hate it when they get salt and hold it a foot above the pan and dramatically rub thier fingers to release the salt into the food.

I normally tip the salt from the saxo 69p for 8 kilos cooking salt straight from the spout.

Remember poncey chefs hate cyclists. What was the name of that chopper who used to wear a headband that had to apologise sfter a test drive article ?

john-e-big-guns

And after the chef as scratch his a**s picked his nose whilst preping the meal...he then stacks the cooked items of food on the plate...like a pile of builders rubbish...whats that all about

Sirius631

dmclite wrote:

Emperors new clothes.

I hate it when they get salt and hold it a foot above the pan and dramatically rub thier fingers to release the salt into the food.

I normally tip the salt from the saxo 69p for 8 kilos cooking salt straight from the spout.

Remember poncey chefs hate cyclists. What was the name of that chopper who used to wear a headband that had to apologise sfter a test drive article ?

James...James....James....,pass. Oh, no I know. Martin. Someone should point out that his car would have a better power-to-weight ratio if he didn't sit his over-fed blubber arse in it.

TheStone

Don't understand why chefs are famous. They're just cooking food.

Even I can cook food - granted not as good as them, but how long could it possibly
take to become good?

Aggieboy

TheStone wrote:

Don't understand why chefs are famous. They're just cooking food.

Even I can cook food - granted not as good as them, but how long could it possibly
take to become good?

2 hours at 200*, Gas mark5

Bunneh

I get really wound up when you have their guests saying 'oh yes you can really taste the emotion he put into this dish!'. Yeah he pee-d in it! Then we have the guests who talk utter drivel whilst trying to look remotely intellegent.

I'm happy with beans on toast, if I'm feeling adventurous I will poach an egg and put it on top.

Ooo and don't get me started on housing programs - I buy a house to live in it, not to do it up and then sell it at a 2k profit. PEE PEE OFF!

TheStone

Bunneh wrote:

Ooo and don't get me started on housing programs - I buy a house to live in it, not to do it up and then sell it at a 2k profit. PEE PEE OFF!

Yes. At least the cooks know something and have probably been shouted at by a frenchman
in a boiling hot kitchen for a year or two.

The ones on the property programs know nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Gypsum_Fantastic

TheStone wrote:

Don't understand why chefs are famous. They're just cooking food.

Even I can cook food - granted not as good as them, but how long could it possibly
take to become good?

I don't underastand why cyclists are famous, they're just riding a bike. Even I can ride a bike (just)

My question is :- Why do chefs develop tiny arms when they're putting things on plates?

Monkeypump

What is the collective name for a bunch of ranting culinary philistines?

garryc

mmmm... I love good food and 'fine dining' etc.

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

alfablue

garryc wrote:

mmmm... I love good food and 'fine dining' etc.

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

Go to any chip shop!

outofbreath2

Monkeypump wrote:

What is the collective name for a bunch of ranting culinary philistines?

A gristle?

rick_chasey

garryc wrote:

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

Frying without a pan?

Aggieboy

garryc wrote:

mmmm... I love good food and 'fine dining' etc.

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

Frank the tank

What about "Vine tomato's" as far as I know all tomato's grow on a vine. :roll:

I particularly like those "TREE APPLES" Much better than those plastic bag apples.

Aggieboy

Frank the tank wrote:

What about "Vine tomato's" as far as I know all tomato's grow on a vine. :roll:

I particularly like those "TREE APPLES" Much better than those plastic bag apples.

Ahhh, they're not all sold on the vine though, are they? There is a huge difference in taste and they're one of life's little pleasures. Small, round, sweet and tasty, and those tomatoes are lovely as well!! As you only shop for the wife's cooking sherry I'll let you off.

garryc

Rick Chasey wrote:

garryc wrote:

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

Frying without a pan?

Well, that's deep frying, a bit different really

alfablue

garryc wrote:

Rick Chasey wrote:

garryc wrote:

But what really hacks me off, and gastro pubs are the worst at this, is anything that's 'Pan Fried' err... you just mean fried then. I'd love to see something fried without a pan.

Frying without a pan?

Well, that's deep frying, a bit different really

Yes! A bit different to pan frying, hence the different names "deep frying" and "pan frying" - or, if you prefer, they are both "just frying" then :roll: