Euphemisms!

Pross

Having just announced to the office that I "going to chuck my spud in the oven" and unintentionally raised a few smirks it got me wondering what your favourite euphemisms are?

Anonymous

When you are doing well at something I like,

Call me butter............cos Im on a roll.

dynastarg9

Pross wrote:

Having just announced to the office that I "going to chuck my spud in the oven" and unintentionally raised a few smirks it got me wondering what your favourite euphemisms are?

Not sure what that means...
Something like I'm going to drop the kids off at the pool?

PBo

NSFW if you have some eagle eyed colleagues, or your boss has a tendency to sneak up and read over your shoulder

If it's euphemisms you're after...


http://www.milkinfirst.com/dictionary/profanisaurus.htm

bails87

One of my colleagues told us earlier that she was just popping out for a quick trip to the bank......

crumbschief

Time for a shower.

verloren

Friend was describing his brother's vasectomy to me, and said "He was putting up scaffolding by the afternoon"

Turns out his brother's job is actually putting up scaffolding.

ExeterSimon

She was 'wetter than an otter's pocket' always makes me chuckle.

dennisn

"Slipperier than deer guts on a mountain side"

Pross

Are these euphemisms though? Surely a euphemism is a perfectly respectable phrase that can be interpretted otherwise such as "I took her up the back stairwell". I like Verloren's one though

shockedsoshocked

I use the phrase "punching above their weight" with regards to peoples girlfriends/boyfriends quite a lot.

Homer J

Pross wrote:

Are these euphemisms though? Surely a euphemism is a perfectly respectable phrase that can be interpretted otherwise such as "I took her up the back stairwell". I like Verloren's one though

Is a euphenism the same as a double entendre? :?

rick_chasey

Homer J wrote:

Pross wrote:

Are these euphemisms though? Surely a euphemism is a perfectly respectable phrase that can be interpretted otherwise such as "I took her up the back stairwell". I like Verloren's one though

Is a euphenism the same as a double entendre? :?

Not really.

For example, someone 'passing away' is a euphamism for someone dying.

It's just a way of substituting something considered vulgar or inappropriate with something less so.

Pross

Yep, I suppose they are almost opposites (and what I quoted was clearly a double entendre :oops: ). The one is a phrase deliberately used in place of something that could be considered vulgar as Rick says whilst the other is inadvertently saying something that could be misconstrued as rude. I should change the title of this thread :oops:

bompington

Around here we don't like to use the word euphemisms, we prefer to call them "happy words"

Frank the tank

Rick Chasey wrote:

Homer J wrote:

Pross wrote:

Are these euphemisms though? Surely a euphemism is a perfectly respectable phrase that can be interpretted otherwise such as "I took her up the back stairwell". I like Verloren's one though

Is a euphenism the same as a double entendre? :?

Not really.

For example, someone 'passing away' is a euphamism for someone dying.

It's just a way of substituting something considered vulgar or inappropriate with something less so.

My uncle (who had a wicked/dry sense of humour) had died and I bumped into his neighbour who said "It's a shame we've lost George."

Quick as a flash I replied "Yes but I'm sure we'll find him in time for the funeral".
It sounds bad but, it was exactly the sort of thing he himself would have said and I'm sure he'd have appreciated it.

phil s

My missus asked me to butter her crumpet the other day.

Aggieboy

phil s wrote:

My missus asked me to butter her crumpet the other day.

Too much butter and I find they drip out of the bottom.

Stewie Griffin

Aggieboy wrote:

phil s wrote:

My missus asked me to butter her crumpet the other day.

Too much butter and I find they drip out of the bottom.

I keep buttering until it drips out of the bottom .

Clever Pun

ShockedSoShocked wrote:

I use the phrase "punching above their weight" with regards to peoples girlfriends/boyfriends quite a lot.

I tend to use Away win for that as well

Here's a few I've used a fair bit:
Dropping the kids off at the pool
Feeding the ducks
greyhound skirt (used in a sentence, probably OT but amusing)
do phrases like badly packed kebab count?

shouldbeinbed

I like to 'deposit yesterdays takings'

pneumatic

If I go to a stranger's house and need a pee, I always ask "Can I use your euphemism?".

Mrs Pneumatic (who is a famously straight talking lady) always glowers at me fiercely when I do this (which makes it worth the effort! )

pneumatic

Also, I once had a girlfriend whose Dad really was called "John Thomas", and was an Australian to boot!

stigofthedump

Who has 'Cut the cheese'.

skyd0g

After several pints I then go to 'lubricate the porcelain'.