Symptoms of being a roadie

2

Comments

  • disgruntledgoat
    disgruntledgoat Posts: 8,957
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    Legwarmers to a race ought to result in your license being revoked as you're clearly not taking your hobby seriously.
    "In many ways, my story was that of a raging, Christ-like figure who hauled himself off the cross, looked up at the Romans with blood in his eyes and said 'My turn, sock cookers'"

    @gietvangent
  • secretsqizz
    secretsqizz Posts: 424
    Pokerface wrote:
    secretsqizz wrote:
    I understand excessive caffeine as the now drug of choice
    but
    unsure of
    eau d'turd?

    Roadies usually like to shed a few extra ounces of weight before races. In the form of turds.

    clear now,
    as long as it is done at the roadside behind opposition team car?
    My pen won't write on the screen
  • valedragon
    valedragon Posts: 37
    Willing to spend over £100 on a single pair of shorts.
    :lol:
  • robbiedont
    robbiedont Posts: 89
    Pronouncing anything remotely French with a very dodgy accent.
  • freehub
    freehub Posts: 4,257
    Pokerface wrote:
    secretsqizz wrote:
    I understand excessive caffeine as the now drug of choice
    but
    unsure of
    eau d'turd?

    Roadies usually like to shed a few extra ounces of weight before races. In the form of turds.

    Maybe that's why I came almost last at darley moor then second in the handicap? I had a stomach full of crap on the first race :lol:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    Legwarmers to a race ought to result in your license being revoked as you're clearly not taking your hobby seriously.

    What's wrong with leg warmers? If it's cold they're needed even in a race.
  • disgruntledgoat
    disgruntledgoat Posts: 8,957
    WIll, Will, Will...


    1) That's what embrocation was invented for.

    2) You shave your legs and then nobody sees them

    3) It's called Panache. Bernard Hinault wouldn't have raced in legwarmers.
    "In many ways, my story was that of a raging, Christ-like figure who hauled himself off the cross, looked up at the Romans with blood in his eyes and said 'My turn, sock cookers'"

    @gietvangent
  • Matt the Tester
    Matt the Tester Posts: 1,261
    Westerberg wrote:
    unable to commute at anything other than break neck speed.
    lol yeah i do this as much as possible! it's great fun just whizzing down the road
    Coveryourcar.co.uk RT Tester
    north west of england.
  • Mettan
    Mettan Posts: 2,103
    Taking great comfort and pleasure from flicking through CRC's Road-section, and finally finding the link that says "Tyres" .... - then after sorting by price, spending 15 minutes perusing the delights in the £20-30 range. From looking at the colours on the Pro Race 3's, to admiring the "lightness" (in grams) of the more expensive tyres, all the time dreaming of improving your avgs with said chosen tyre.
  • Mccaria
    Mccaria Posts: 869
    A family trip to France is always a choice between the Alps and the Pyrenees, not Paris or Provence.

    Carbon trading is not a flawed free market attempt to control global warming, but selling your Cannondale on Ebay to part fund a Colnago.

    Annorexia is for girls, but some of their techniques are not totally without merit.

    You don't go cycling. You go training or racing.
  • disgruntledgoat
    disgruntledgoat Posts: 8,957
    Mccaria wrote:

    Annorexia is for girls, but some of their techniques are not totally without merit.


    Again... A friends girlfriend once picked up a leaflet at the doctors, something like "if you answer yes to some of these 5 questions you may have an eating disorder"

    Think me and my training buddy had 3 out of 5 each.
    "In many ways, my story was that of a raging, Christ-like figure who hauled himself off the cross, looked up at the Romans with blood in his eyes and said 'My turn, sock cookers'"

    @gietvangent
  • jgsi
    jgsi Posts: 5,062
    Having an injury that means so pssed off that can't be even bothered to go and even sit on the bike let alone chance to actually ride it... 4th week now and it aint not unfunny anymore - severe loss of humour...and ability to write triple negatives
    but still
    having invested in new Sony Bravia hdtv with internet widgets now speedcoded with all the cycling clips from Youtube you can think of.
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Harry B wrote:
    dmclite wrote:
    Always thinking in terms of bike.

    Drifting off in conversation when driving when on a nice road, "hmm, this would be a good road to ride on.." and wife getting humpy.

    Shaving legs more often than Mrs Lite.
    better legs than Mrs lite.

    Sneering at mostly everything that is not road bike related.

    DMC - why have to got a picture of Gary Slapper on your photo site?

    There was a mad professor thread a while ago on here. I liked his name.
  • shockedsoshocked
    shockedsoshocked Posts: 4,021
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    .

    If you need arm warmers you're not racing hard enough :wink:
    "A cyclist has nothing to lose but his chain"

    PTP Runner Up 2015
  • Mettan
    Mettan Posts: 2,103
    Thouroughly enjoying the sensation of picking your bike up after after changing to a carbon stem and seatpost and thinking, "this bike feels so much lighter - I'm going to go faster".
  • disgruntledgoat
    disgruntledgoat Posts: 8,957
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    .

    If you need arm warmers you're not racing hard enough :wink:

    Then you definitely aren't going to like what Will has to say about legwarmers...
    "In many ways, my story was that of a raging, Christ-like figure who hauled himself off the cross, looked up at the Romans with blood in his eyes and said 'My turn, sock cookers'"

    @gietvangent
  • daveydave43
    daveydave43 Posts: 200
    cycling more miles in a day than you do walking in a month.

    needing to wear lycra for any outing on the bike.

    trying to explain to non cyclists that assos is good value.

    tyring to explain to the other half why selling the car/house/kids to fund your hobby is justified.
    Go for the break
    Create a chaingang
    Make sure you don't break your chain
  • micken
    micken Posts: 275
    Spent as much time obsessive-compulsively researching and buying espresso machine as normally do with bike bits ............

    ............ and yes, did buy an Italian one in the end :lol:
  • page23
    page23 Posts: 182
    There is nothing odd about having bikes in your living room

    You know every shortcut and every back road within 50 miles of your house

    You have tanned patches on the backs of your hand

    You use your helmet as a styling device

    You stare at other cyclists . . . to check out their ride

    You tell a family of 5 in a crowded shopping centre to “hold their line.”

    Everyone thinks you are mad because you ride your bike to work even in winter.

    You have shared a hotel room with your bike

    You wear clothes on your bike that you would never be caught dead in anywhere else, and don’t care what it looks like…

    You have more invested in your bikes than your car

    You park your car outside and use your garage for your bikes.

    You take a short easy ride and come home 5 hours later suffering from hypothermia.

    You get a haircut that works with your helmet

    You apologise to your bike when you hit a pot hole.

    You log more miles on your bike than miles in your car.

    You think 7 quid for a cinema ticket is outrageous but 3 grand for a new bike seems reasonable.

    When you're driving in your car you swerve around every pothole

    You have lost feeling in your hands, neck and groin for substantial periods of time, but still you consider it the fair price of doing business on two wheels.
  • page23
    page23 Posts: 182
    edited May 2010
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    .

    If you need arm warmers you're not racing hard enough :wink:

    i go out in just speedos, akin to triathletes. does that mean i'm racing too hard?
  • Stone Glider
    Stone Glider Posts: 1,227
    You mention Pareee/Roubaix in the spring and call a water bottle a "bidet"




    (yes I know)




    :roll:
    The older I get the faster I was
  • shockedsoshocked
    shockedsoshocked Posts: 4,021
    Page23 wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    .

    If you need arm warmers you're not racing hard enough :wink:

    i go out in just speedos, akin to triathletes. does that mean i'm racing too hard?

    No, it just means you're a triathlete. Worse than MTBers :wink:
    "A cyclist has nothing to lose but his chain"

    PTP Runner Up 2015
  • freehub
    freehub Posts: 4,257
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    WIll, Will, Will...


    1) That's what embrocation was invented for.

    2) You shave your legs and then nobody sees them

    3) It's called Panache. Bernard Hinault wouldn't have raced in legwarmers.

    Well I won't be subjecting my legs to unnecessary cold that could irritate my knees any time soon.
  • simonaspinall
    simonaspinall Posts: 645
    Your missus enquires why you have put SIS bottles at the table instead of wine glasses for your romantic dinner
    What wheels...? Wheelsmith.co.uk!
  • disgruntledgoat
    disgruntledgoat Posts: 8,957
    freehub wrote:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    WIll, Will, Will...


    1) That's what embrocation was invented for.

    2) You shave your legs and then nobody sees them

    3) It's called Panache. Bernard Hinault wouldn't have raced in legwarmers.

    Well I won't be subjecting my legs to unnecessary cold that could irritate my knees any time soon.

    I refer you to my first point

    I'm sure Andy Hampsten knew nowt about the cold's effect on his legs...

    andy.jpg
    "In many ways, my story was that of a raging, Christ-like figure who hauled himself off the cross, looked up at the Romans with blood in his eyes and said 'My turn, sock cookers'"

    @gietvangent
  • davidcambridge1
    davidcambridge1 Posts: 275
    When you have to check the weather forecast before going out, and then spend several minutes taking it into account before deciding on the correct bike to go out on!
  • Matt the Tester
    Matt the Tester Posts: 1,261
    lol a good list up there :))

    on a side note could someone buy this bike for me? pleaseeeeee


    http://www.bikeradar.com/gallery/articl ... %2Farticle
    Coveryourcar.co.uk RT Tester
    north west of england.
  • SteveR_100Milers
    SteveR_100Milers Posts: 5,987
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    disgruntledgoat wrote:
    ShockedSoShocked wrote:
    I don't know if it's just me, but I have the most utter disdain for people who let their arm warmers roll down so you can see a good inch of flesh between them and the jersey.

    Anyone else?

    There's a fine line there... I think I'd allow this two hours or more into a RACE (not ride), as it shows you're working hard.

    .

    If you need arm warmers you're not racing hard enough :wink:
    :D
    http://www.pontypoolrcc.co.uk/
    www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=44397853765
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    When you see a gorgeous girl out on a bike, you check out the bike first. :wink:
  • eskimo Joe
    eskimo Joe Posts: 764
    Mccaria wrote:
    A family trip to France is always a choice between the Alps and the Pyrenees, not Paris or Provence.

    Carbon trading is not a flawed free market attempt to control global warming, but selling your Cannondale on Ebay to part fund a Colnago.

    Annorexia is for girls, but some of their techniques are not totally without merit.

    You don't go cycling. You go training or racing.

    Your wife says she would love to goto Provence and you think great MT Ventoux , but dont mention it so you dont jinx it . ( still not been yet)
    Suburban studs yodel better than anyone else
  • RealMan
    RealMan Posts: 2,166
    Page23 wrote:
    You think 7 quid for a cinema ticket is outrageous but 3 grand for a new bike seems reasonable.

    Liked that one lol :D

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