Comedic Confrontations

prj45

So, this guy drove past me using his mobile phone.

I rode past his driver's window and shouted "tell them you'll call them back when you've finished driving your car".

Cue a middle finger, then a rolled down window.

"What business is it of yours?" he asked.

"It is my business, we're sharing the road and I don't like sharing it with people talking on their mobile phone whilst driving their car", yadda yadda.

Then he started ranting about me being on a bike and him being in a car (either an "I'm better than you" rant or a veiled threat to maim/kill).

He went on for a bit, and the thing is, throughout the whole of this, and despite the threats, all I could think was that he sounded exactly like Dara O' Brian, doing his "pyramid of L plates" routine, so all I could do whilst he threatened to kill me was grin inanely which made him madder I think.

Anyway, he made what I think was an unplanned right turn after I rode up behind him twice, but he wasn't on his phone at the time.

cjcp

Aren't you about 6ft 4?

prj45

cjcp wrote:

Aren't you about 6ft 4?

Yup.

I did have one guy get out of a car once after he tried to cut me up on Traf square and I'd banged on his roof (shows how close he was).

He got out, and looked up, and up and then his shoulders sunk a bit.

Wish I'd got that on camera, it was quite funny to see him literally deflate like that.

londonbairn

Was called a pauper once by a pedestrian who looked like an utter chav, found that hillarious.

prj45

londonbairn wrote:

Was called a pauper once by a pedestrian who looked like an utter chav, found that hillarious.

Thing is, if his "I'm in a car" comment was about social status rather than a threat to kill, it certainly looked like my bike (and the kit on it) was worth twice what his car was worth anyway.

Also, on the critical mass I went on recently somebody shouted out from a pub to everybody on the ride "GET A JOB!" with predictable hilarity resulting.

cjcp

prj45 wrote:

cjcp wrote:

Aren't you about 6ft 4?

Yup.

I did have one guy get out of a car once after he tried to cut me up on Traf square and I'd banged on his roof (shows how close he was).

He got out, and looked up, and up and then his shoulders sunk a bit.

Wish I'd got that on camera, it was quite funny to see him literally deflate like that.

Heh heh .

QuinnDexter

Part of my commute involves negotiating a blind bend and a rather narrow bridge.

Here it is in street view, just keep going until you come to the bridge.

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=warrington,uk&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=36.315864,77.255859&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Warrington,+Cheshire,+United+Kingdom&ll=53.36161,-2.60627&spn=0,0.009431&t=h&z=17&layer=c&cbll=53.3602,-2.607262&panoid=oD5a9EkQO_qdBZgpRg4Rbg&cbp=12,355.28,,0,19.44

Anyway, this road is used by Horse riders, cyclists and idiot motorists using it as a rat run and given that the visibility from each way is bad, having motorists use their horn is a god send. So one day I approach the bridge, slowdown incase a car is on the bridge, and then proceed. A woman is racing over the bridge towards me. Stops and then complains that "I shouldn't be in the middle of the road" and that she "Doesn't have to use her horn". I smile at her and tell her that perhaps she should drive with more due care and attention and bid her goodbye..before my anger erupts and I thow her keys into the canal. :twisted:. Oh did I say she was pig ugly!!!!

mtb-idle

I find that 'high-fiving' commuters standing with their arms out at bus stops always brings a laugh...

cjcp

MTB-Idle wrote:

I find that 'high-fiving' commuters standing with their arms out at bus stops always brings a laugh...

Always wanted to do this, too.

Paul E

I had to giggle about the high fiving

MonkeyMonster

cjcp wrote:

MTB-Idle wrote:

I find that 'high-fiving' commuters standing with their arms out at bus stops always brings a laugh...

Always wanted to do this, too.

Stings like fuck though... I one hi fived my bro both on bikes going against each other at about 15 mph each. Fuck me that hurt. We were 12 and 14 though

Wallace1492

cjcp wrote:

MTB-Idle wrote:

I find that 'high-fiving' commuters standing with their arms out at bus stops always brings a laugh...

Always wanted to do this, too.

I have nearly done this so many times... Especially as I am in front of the No 10 bus down most of Maryhill Road...

amnezia

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMQk8Uncl9k

kelsen

amnezia wrote:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMQk8Uncl9k

2:34: "You f****** try to steal my mother f****** MetroCard, mother fucker!!!"

Class!

rolf_f

MTB-Idle wrote:

I find that 'high-fiving' commuters standing with their arms out at bus stops always brings a laugh...

I always want to stop and say 'room for one more'; I should probably stick a big 760 number on the front of my bike and pretend to be the Keighley bus

Zachariah

The high-fiving thing is great - my route doesn't give any opportunity for that, sadly.

On a different comedy note, I was having a look at how carbon frames are made and came across this charming picture (number two in the slideshow) of one of Giant's engineers, Nixon Huang. Pay close attention to the corporate logo on his chest.

kelsen

Zachariah wrote:

On a different comedy note, I was having a look at how carbon frames are made and came across this charming picture (number two in the slideshow) of one of Giant's engineers, Nixon Huang. Pay close attention to the corporate logo on his chest.

...so childish

Love it!

downfader

Zachariah wrote:

The high-fiving thing is great - my route doesn't give any opportunity for that, sadly.

On a different comedy note, I was having a look at how carbon frames are made and came across this charming picture (number two in the slideshow) of one of Giant's engineers, Nixon Huang. Pay close attention to the corporate logo on his chest.

oh.




my.





god.




:shock: 8)

Canny Jock

Zachariah wrote:

The high-fiving thing is great - my route doesn't give any opportunity for that, sadly.

On a different comedy note, I was having a look at how carbon frames are made and came across this charming picture (number two in the slideshow) of one of Giant's engineers, Nixon Huang. Pay close attention to the corporate logo on his chest.

de_sisti

If ever you want to see a woman driver go ballistic when involved in a bike/car altercation,
tell her that she's got lots of fat and cellulite around her hips and thighs and the only way
to get rid of it is to ride a bike.

I've said it on a couple of occassions and I could swear that both of them wanted to knock
me spark out.

bill_gates

Zachariah wrote:

The high-fiving thing is great - my route doesn't give any opportunity for that, sadly.

On a different comedy note, I was having a look at how carbon frames are made and came across this charming picture (number two in the slideshow) of one of Giant's engineers, Nixon Huang. Pay close attention to the corporate logo on his chest.

Totally rolling on floor laughing.