Bunk beds.....

hopper1

I've worked offshore for 26 years, and I still hate bunk beds :evil:
There's nothing worse than being in the top bunk...
Finish a long, twelve hour shift in the freezing North Sea weather, go for a shower where you can only select absolutely boiling hot, or fffffffffreezing cold water, off to the galley for some God awful food, chucked together by someone mascarading as a chef, then off to bed.... The fcuking bunk bed!
Climb up the ladder, swing your leg over towards the matress, then AAAAAARRRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!
You realise you've kneeled on the end of your c0ck again :shock: :shock:
























Rant over












Not all the chefs are crap.

Aggieboy

I think you need the 'longest member' thread!!

hopper1

Aggieboy wrote:

I think you need the 'longest member' thread!!

Too shy, mate :oops:

Aggieboy

Ands will be along soon.

hopper1

Best I tuck it away, then

shouldbeinbed

hopper1 wrote:

You realise you've kneeled on the end of your c0ck again :shock: :shock:

would be worse if it was someone elses

Ho hum

You do get paid well for it though.

Even still, I prefer to stay on dry land and there is no way I would work offshore.

spen666

I didn't realise you were allowed to keep farmyard animals in your room when working offshore

jedster

I didn't realise you were allowed to keep farmyard animals in your room when working offshore

au contraire - it's practically compulsory or am I mixing it up with really filthy pornography?

disclosure: I've never worked offshore

J

shockedsoshocked

Doesn't sound too bad. You could end up lumped with a former Glaswegian gangster nut case, who sports a Chelsea smile and screams in his sleep the first few nights whilst the alcohol leaves his system.

This has happened to my dad on seemingly more than one occasion.

crumbschief

This sounds like a film waiting to happen.

hopper1

I daren't make any further comments, for fear of incriminating myself... :oops:

Ands

hopper1 wrote:

I daren't make any further comments, for fear of incriminating myself... :oops:

OK, this is what we know so far:
You live with other men
Some of the male chefs you live with aren't bad
You would prefer to be underneath with another man on top

I can't imagine what else you are worried about telling us. 8)

Anonymous

When I was in Bosnia, in a small camp in Vitez, we had 4 blokes to a container (shipping type) with 2 sets of bunkbeds. I got dibs on the bottom one, but to my mis-fortune my mate Matt got the top bunk. Each morning without fail he would jump down, fart then shake his bare ar5e at me, a foot from my head.

I had almost 6 months of that. when we got mangled it came to fisticuffs.

Ahh, memories.....

hopper1

Ands wrote:

hopper1 wrote:

I daren't make any further comments, for fear of incriminating myself... :oops:

OK, this is what we know so far:
You live with other men
Some of the male chefs you live with aren't bad
You would prefer to be underneath with another man on top

I can't imagine what else you are worried about telling us. 8)

Ahhhh, Ands... I knew you'd be loitering hereabouts, just biding your time for a witty comment.

EDIT: :shock: Just re read that and realised I denied nothing :shock:

Do you twist everything, Ands...? :oops:

Ands

hopper1 wrote:

Ands wrote:

hopper1 wrote:

I daren't make any further comments, for fear of incriminating myself... :oops:

OK, this is what we know so far:
You live with other men
Some of the male chefs you live with aren't bad
You would prefer to be underneath with another man on top

I can't imagine what else you are worried about telling us. 8)

Ahhhh, Ands... I knew you'd be loitering hereabouts, just biding your time for a witty comment.

EDIT: :shock: Just re read that and realised I denied nothing :shock:

Do you twist everything, Ands...? :oops:

Twist everything? Are you saying I've misinterpreted your earlier posts? Sorry - that's the problem with the internet - easy mistake

hopper1

All part of the fun....

Radioactiveman

Top bunk is best.

Piss obeys the law of gravity like any fluid