Nudged by a Landy

Roastie

So, I'm happily ambling along Albert Bridge Road, just in my cool down and in a terribly good mood enjoying the afternoon.

I'm riding a reasonable distance from the parked cars, but perhaps not quite as "primary" as would have been appropriate given the pinch points.

So, Idiot in his black Range Rover (you know the type) decides to pass at one of these points, and on passing me, his wing mirror nudges me (my bag) - but it is gentle, and no harm done in reality and (much to my own surprise), my mood remains very good.

As is usually the case, about 3 seconds later, I pull up next to him at the light - this time next to his (darkly tinted) window - and I wave to get his attention. Opening the window reveals a tragically well dressed tw*t and two unfeasibly gorgeous women.

The conversation goes something like this:

Me: (in a friendly, but firm tone) "Just thought I'd let you know that you hit me on my bag with your wing mirror."

Idiot: "Who's to say your bag didn't hit my mirror?" (chuckles and turns to the girls to see the effect, they look bemused but not terribly impressed)

I reckon the one in the front had the hots for me, pretty par for the course really ...

Now, I'd love to say that I had a brilliant, cutting comeback but I must admit that this completely threw me. So I said something along the lines of:

"That is utter rubbish and you know it. No harm was done this time, but just be more careful."

At which point I turned and moved forward into the ASL.

Amazingly, my mood remained quite good - maybe because it was a completely argy free encounter. Still grates.

Sewinman

I would have said 'whose to say your face won't shortly head butt my fist?'

Greg T

Roastiecp wrote:

"That is utter rubbish and you know it. No harm was done this time, but just be more careful."

You are zen master of control.

The burds obviously fancied you and he was threatened. Did you get one their phone numbers?

Eau Rouge

Roastiecp wrote:

Idiot: "Who's to say your bag didn't hit my mirror?"
...
Now, I'd love to say that I had a brilliant, cutting comeback but I must admit that this completely threw me.

"Not me, lets phone the police, they can decide."

gtvlusso

If I had a black Range Rover, I'd fill it with girls.........

You should have looked at one of the girls in a quizzical way and said: "Karen, is that you?! I thought we'd agreed that prostitution was not the way forward for you in our counseling sessions"....

lost_in_thought

Roastiecp wrote:

Idiot: "Who's to say your bag didn't hit my mirror?" (chuckles and turns to the girls to see the effect, they look bemused but not terribly impressed)

What an idiot. Not you, the idiot.

I'm so set back by that display of idiocy that I'm having an esprit d'escalier moment too!

Aidy

I think I prefer it when that happens as opposed to when they nudge you when you're at the front of lights, at least you know it's accidental then, if a little careless.

soy_sauce

gtvlusso wrote:

If I had a black Range Rover, I'd fill it with girls.........

You should have looked at one of the girls in a quizzical way and said: "Karen, is that you?! I thought we'd agreed that prostitution was not the way forward for you in our counseling sessions"....

image one of them actually called Karen.

cjcp

You have two very good looking daughters.

EDIT: Chapeau on your control. I would said "you're a kn0b-rot who needs to learn how to drive this piece of over-priced [dog excrement]" or something equally unintelligent. I can never think of a good comeback. :?

jedster

Roastie,

I think you handled that pretty well. He will have felt a bit of a prick and, better, the girls will have thought he was a bit of a prick too.

I think my esprit d'escalier come back would have been directed to the girls:

And you two choose to spend time with this idiot? (head shake and exit stage left)

although there's something to be said for

You really are a complete and utter muppet (in a bemused and saddened tone).

In reality I would probably have gaped open mouthed so, given that, chapeau to you.

J

bomberesque

well done.

Roastie

Thanks, but I think it had less to do with good self control than simply being in too good a mood to let it annoy me.

Another incident on Sat afternoon was completely different - I was unlocking at the bike rack just down from Monmouth Coffee when this old guy harmlessly trips over my ankle (I guess he didn't see me crouching down to retrieve my lock? :roll: ).

Once he recovers from his stumble, he turns around an calls me "Tw*t!"

To which I respond: (very loudly) Excuse me!?! Come again!?!

Old Codger's reply?: "W*nker!"

At which point (I am ashamed to say) I lost my rag, observed that he resembled the end of a phallus and suggested that he try fornicating with himself. :oops:

agnello

Is Landy vernacular for the archetype driving the Range Rover?

It's hot in the studio today :oops:

Roastie

agnello wrote:

Is Landy vernacular for the archetype driving the Range Rover?

It's hot in the studio today :oops:

Nope, refers to the vehicle ... and I just used the wrong term - should be a Rangey I guess... :oops:

nwallace

How about.

I notice your attempt to break your wing mirror failed, how about I help?

And since a Range Rover is merley a model of Land Rover, refering to them as Landys is perfectly acceptable, even though the only real Land Rover is the model now known as the defender.