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Rules of the road (not for cyclists)

edited June 2009 in Commuting chat
Pain is only weakness leaving the body

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  • doog442doog442 Posts: 370
    i concur with the first respondent

    have just wasted a whole 5 minutes of my life that I will never be able to retrieve, reading your article. I am a cyclist and also a HGV driver, the whole of your article is a complete and utter waste of words. How in the name of god GQ pay you for this drivel is amazing
  • downfaderdownfader Posts: 3,686
    Excellent satire! :D
  • CafewandaCafewanda Posts: 2,788
    Excellent article. I agree with every word :P
  • CiBCiB Posts: 6,098
    Agree with the guy who posted the first comment - what a waste of 5 minutes. Are we really still supposed to find that sort of thing amusing, someone picking a handful of cliches and turning them into instructions? Sort of thing that used to appear in a 6th Form mag, and pretty much on the same level of humour. Pitiful.
  • always_tyredalways_tyred Posts: 4,965
    Agree with the guy who posted the first comment - what a waste of 5 minutes. Are we really still supposed to find that sort of thing amusing, someone picking a handful of cliches and turning them into instructions? Sort of thing that used to appear in a 6th Form mag, and pretty much on the same level of humour. Pitiful.
    Lighten up. Its supposed to be a foil to similar rants directed at cyclists by everyone else.

    Its mainstream so its a bit "lowest common denominator", although never underestimate how little te common ped/motorist comprehends about cycling. You never know, it might just get people to think.

    Truck driver comment sanctimonious though. I get where he is coming from - artic drivers in particular tend to be highly skilled and its not good to be tarred with the same brish as a few bad exponents of an art. But not all professional drivers have a clue and its not uncommon to find one's self in a truck blind spot because a truck has overtaken you and placed you there without any comprehension or consideration.
  • downfaderdownfader Posts: 3,686
    ...I'm reminded of what Spike Milligan said about Hitler for some reason. Bring the frightening and dangerous back down to earth with satire and a good p*** take.
  • DiggingDeeperDiggingDeeper Posts: 225
    Cyclists are clearly the real threat

    TCS, it's good that you finally put your finger on the nub of the problem.
    I jest of course.........
    I assume you are back on your bike after that ped put you over the bars?

    Regards

    DD
    [1]Ribble winter special
    [2] Trek 5200 old style carbon
    [3] Frankensteins hybrid FCN 8
  • biondinobiondino Posts: 5,990
    Agree with the guy who posted the first comment - what a waste of 5 minutes. Are we really still supposed to find that sort of thing amusing, someone picking a handful of cliches and turning them into instructions? Sort of thing that used to appear in a 6th Form mag, and pretty much on the same level of humour. Pitiful.

    It's not funny, and a massive and utterly predictable sarcasm overdose isn't exactly entertaining. It'll make sensible cyclists roll their eyes and 4-wheeled drivers think "god, cyclists are c***s". :roll:
  • always_tyredalways_tyred Posts: 4,965
    biondino wrote:
    Agree with the guy who posted the first comment - what a waste of 5 minutes. Are we really still supposed to find that sort of thing amusing, someone picking a handful of cliches and turning them into instructions? Sort of thing that used to appear in a 6th Form mag, and pretty much on the same level of humour. Pitiful.

    It's not funny, and a massive and utterly predictable sarcasm overdose isn't exactly entertaining. It'll make sensible cyclists roll their eyes and 4-wheeled drivers think "god, cyclists are c***s". :roll:
    You're no fun any more.
  • Clever PunClever Pun Posts: 6,778
    Hasn't most of it been lifted from somewhere else I'm sure I've read that before
    Purveyor of sonic doom

    Very Hairy Roadie - FCN 4
    Fixed Pista- FCN 5
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  • lost_in_thoughtlost_in_thought Posts: 10,563
    I quite liked it... :oops:
  • Kieran_BurnsKieran_Burns Posts: 10,052
    I think maybe some people have had a sense of humour failure this morning :wink:


    It's completely tongue in cheek and not exactly original - it pokes fun at stereotypes which is a staple of basic british humour.



    I quite like it as well :P
    Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
    2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
    2011 Trek Madone 4.5
    2012 Felt F65X
    Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter
  • biondinobiondino Posts: 5,990
    Yeah but lazy humour, especially unsubtle sarcasm, is pretty contemptible. All it needed was a spark of originality or something, but no. I mean, sure, it's not THAT bad but when was the last time you won an argument with beat-you-over-the-head sarcasm?
  • always_tyredalways_tyred Posts: 4,965
    biondino wrote:
    when was the last time you won an argument with beat-you-over-the-head sarcasm?
    Um.... quite frequently. :oops:
  • OldSkoolKonaOldSkoolKona Posts: 655
    Very funny, sorry, but I think satire of this form is the best way to get people to see things from another point of view. But even if it doesn't change anyones' views its still funny.

    Lack of originality, not sure if that is the point. The idea is to poke fun at the things that are frequent. Mrs OSK and I saw pretty much all of those behaviours along the embankment yesterday.

    One that they need to add is the 'must overtake cyclist by going into right hand lane at roundabout, because cyclist is in primary in left lane as they are going straight on, and then try to left hook them'. :shock: Fortunately they had the roof off their convertible so I was able to supply a few polite words of driving advice.
  • PorgyPorgy Posts: 4,558
    It's lazy - and not all that funny - but it does make the point rather well, I think.

    Anyway it shows you that drivers react quite badly to criticism - whenever I read one of those cycling on the pavements jumping lights type articles that crop up in the mainstream press about once or twice a month as rgular as clockwork, I don't notice a cry from motorists for blanced articles then - hypoctrical c*nts that they are (mostly).

    Especially since some arrogant son of a b*tch driving a highway maintenance lorry this morning passed me on the right and cut in front of me, forcing me to brake sharply, so he could save a few seconds getting to a red light. when I called him a censored he said he was nowhere near me.

    Of course if he had run me over he would have claimed that I was trying to overtake him on the left. :evil:
  • "Access denied - Entertainment/Provocative Attire"

    Jeez, my firm has strict internet access rules. :(
    Never be tempted to race against a Barclays Cycle Hire bike. If you do, there are only two outcomes. Of these, by far the better is that you now have the scalp of a Boris Bike.
  • gtvlussogtvlusso Posts: 5,112
    GQ = Low brow writing and low quality soft p*rn

    FHM = Low brow writing, incorrect spelling and poor grammer, average quality soft p*rn

    Nuts = literal rubbish, poor quality soft p*rn

    Readers wifes = no writing, no quality, ruff as you like p*rn

    Playboy = good writing, good quality soft p*rn ( no one has read it since 1978)

    Cyling + = good quality writing, bicycle p*rn.....

    Hmmm - subscription!
  • biondinobiondino Posts: 5,990
    biondino wrote:
    when was the last time you won an argument with beat-you-over-the-head sarcasm?
    Um.... quite frequently. :oops:

    Haha I was thinking of you when I wrote that :)
  • will3will3 Posts: 2,173
    Agree with the guy who posted the first comment - what a waste of 5 minutes. .

    You don't 'arf read slow. :lol:
  • always_tyredalways_tyred Posts: 4,965
    biondino wrote:
    biondino wrote:
    when was the last time you won an argument with beat-you-over-the-head sarcasm?
    Um.... quite frequently. :oops:

    Haha I was thinking of you when I wrote that :)
    :?
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