Women, floaty skirts and gusty wind. A good mixture.

tardington

Three today on way into work! 8)

always_tyred

I would like to apologise for my fellow Edinburger's preoccupation with looking up skirts. Today is, indeed exceptionally windy, but he has a history of this sort of thing and has made the local papers several times. Really, this is no excuse and he should have been concentrating on traffic.

_Brun_

These three 'women', were they carrying funny looking handbags with big pipes sticking out of them?

I'd be keeping my eyes firmly on the road ahead of me, just in case.

cee

_Brun_ wrote:

These three 'women', were they carrying funny looking handbags with big pipes sticking out of them?

I'd be keeping my eyes firmly on the road ahead of me, just in case.

Have you ever felt the weight of tartan? The likelihood of a kilt being lifted in the same manner as a floaty dress is reasuringly low.

Of course, when wearing a kilt, the liklihood of it being lifted by almost every woman you meet is very high.

AyrshireBacon

cee wrote:

Have you ever felt the weight of tartan? The likelihood of a kilt being lifted in the same manner as a floaty dress is reasuringly low.

Of course, when wearing a kilt, the liklihood of it being lifted by almost every woman you meet is very high.

Very true. When I've been wearing my kilt and the women ask @that@ question (re: undercrackers), I always ask the same thing of them. A few have been quite offended - double standards no less.

Rich158

cee wrote:

_Brun_ wrote:

These three 'women', were they carrying funny looking handbags with big pipes sticking out of them?

I'd be keeping my eyes firmly on the road ahead of me, just in case.

Have you ever felt the weight of tartan? The likelihood of a kilt being lifted in the same manner as a floaty dress is reasuringly low.

Of course, when wearing a kilt, the liklihood of it being lifted by almost every woman you meet is very high.

I'm off to get me a kilt and a decent Scottish accent

AyrshireBacon

Rich158 wrote:

I'm off to get me a kilt and a decent Scottish accent

The kilt is the easy bit.

A good test for the accent is the ability to say @loch@ without someone thinking you are talking about something you open with a key.
Good luck!

Feltup

LOCK

---

Bugger!

AyrshireBacon

Feltup wrote:

LOCK

---

Bugger!

Try buying the kilt first then and hope it gives you inspiration.

DO NOT watch Braveheart (backwards step)

Feltup

I'll stick to reading Oor Wullie! (in my kilt)

sarajoy

Women, floaty skirts and gusty wind. A good mixture. latest post: Feltup

/me shivers

cee

AyrshireBacon wrote:

Rich158 wrote:

I'm off to get me a kilt and a decent Scottish accent

The kilt is the easy bit.

A good test for the accent is the ability to say @loch@ without someone thinking you are talking about something you open with a key.
Good luck!

and once you have mastered loch, the final test for a 5th Dan Jock Accent is

"braw bricht moonlicht nicht the nicht".....without threatening to throw the things you build houses with at the moon

cee

Rich158 wrote:

cee wrote:

_Brun_ wrote:

These three 'women', were they carrying funny looking handbags with big pipes sticking out of them?

I'd be keeping my eyes firmly on the road ahead of me, just in case.

Have you ever felt the weight of tartan? The likelihood of a kilt being lifted in the same manner as a floaty dress is reasuringly low.

Of course, when wearing a kilt, the liklihood of it being lifted by almost every woman you meet is very high.

I'm off to get me a kilt and a decent Scottish accent

I cannot describe to you how sucessful a tool for pulling women the kilt is. Not just in scotland etiher. wear a kilt anywhere in the world and you will be mobbed by women asking fur a "keek up yer kilt".

*caveat quality NOT guaranteed

biondino

Quality WOULD be guaranteed if they looked up MY kilt

(and I am 1/4 Scottish so I can legitimately wear one, I reckon)

AyrshireBacon

Feltup wrote:

I'll stick to reading Oor Wullie! (in my kilt)

As an extra check say the following out loud...
A guy goes into a bakers, points at an item and asks the girl behind the counter “Is that a doughnut or a meringue?”
And she says “No you’re right, it’s a doughnut”
If done correctly, this should be funny. If not, then your accent needs more work. Or I need better jokes.

Oor wullie - very good - keep it up

AyrshireBacon

biondino wrote:

Quality WOULD be guaranteed if they looked up MY kilt

(and I am 1/4 Scottish so I can legitimately wear one, I reckon)

This leads naturally to the joke referring to McDonalds and a quarterpounder, but I'm going to resist the temptation of posting it (as it's even worse than my last effort).

cee

biondino wrote:

Quality WOULD be guaranteed if they looked up MY kilt

why......do you have spare beer goggles in a pouch down there?

Feltup

AyrshireBacon wrote:

Feltup wrote:

I'll stick to reading Oor Wullie! (in my kilt)

As an extra check say the following out loud...
A guy goes into a bakers, points at an item and asks the girl behind the counter “Is that a doughnut or a meringue?”
And she says “No you’re right, it’s a doughnut”
If done correctly, this should be funny. If not, then your accent needs more work. Or I need better jokes.

Oor wullie - very good - keep it up

I am never sure if I am laughing at the joke or the terrible Scottish accent and that is me saying it to myself in ma heed (see how bad an accent it is).

Kieran_Burns

Being 3/4 Irish I have a legitimate (ish) excuse to wear a Tartan. Had a choice of two for the wedding County Wicklow or County Cork - picked the County Cork one 'cos it was me Mums side.

Still got the kilt, Gawd they're HEAVY! Oh, and learning how to have a pee in a Kilt is a.... novel experience....

Should Scottish cyclist wear lycra kilts?

Greg T

I thought you had to be 100% German to wear a Kilt - Prince Albert invented them didn't he?

Here fishy fishy fishy.

woodyonthebeach

women + floaty skirts = Pleasuring ride home or Ride to Work.


Puts a smile on the right part of the face. Good bless the fashionist out there. Good spot sir

Eau Rouge

Kieran_Burns wrote:

Should Scottish cyclist wear lycra kilts?

I'll let you tell Sir Chris Hoy he'll have to wear a kilt at his next race.

cee

Kieran_Burns wrote:

Still got the kilt, Gawd they're HEAVY! Oh, and learning how to have a pee in a Kilt is a.... novel experience....

normally between 1.5 and 2 kilos for a standard kilt (somewhere between 13 and 16 ounces a yard and 4 yards long).....

How to pee in a kilt: Sling yer sporran roon the side ken an fling the hail front end upnoor yer left shoodur. hae yur pish, drop the kilt as ye turn an re-hae yer sporran.

cee

Greg T wrote:

I thought you had to be 100% German to wear a Kilt - Prince Albert invented them didn't he?

Here fishy fishy fishy.

surely Thomas Rawlinson would be the englishmans choice of kilt fishing lure? not biting you will notice...merely questioning your tools

AyrshireBacon

Greg T wrote:

I thought you had to be 100% German to wear a Kilt - Prince Albert invented them didn't he?

Here fishy fishy fishy.

I always thought that Prince Albert invented something completely different and of a more, ahem!, personal nature :oops:

Can't imagine that the two would go together particularly well :shock:

mats

they are recorded as far back as the 15 th century, prince Albert re-popularised them after they had been banned, I think sir Walter Scott had something to do with this as well but I could be wrong!

cee

oh no....don't bite the wrong lure!

Greg T

cee wrote:

surely Thomas Rawlinson would be the englishmans choice of kilt fishing lure? not biting you will notice...merely questioning your tools

I never knew that

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Rawlinson

Funny thing the t'internet.

There's been a disappointing amount of Braveheart esque gobbing off so far - don't tell me its too early for the Buckfast.

AyrshireBacon

cee wrote:

How to pee in a kilt: Sling yer sporran roon the side ken an fling the hail front end upnoor yer left shoodur. hae yur pish, drop the kilt as ye turn an re-hae yer sporran.

Perfectly clear instructions for the whole procedure. Anyone that can't understand shouldn't be wearing a kilt in the first place.

Cee, are you a native of Edinburgh or somewhere a bit to the west of that (the place that shall not be named, just in case)?

AyrshireBacon

Never too early for the Buccy! Not a full Scottish breakfast without it

cee

AyrshireBacon

Fathers side from inverness-shire, mothers side were travellers who stayed still for a while in aberdeen-shire, then my mother and father moved around an awful lot when I was kid. So my accent is all over the place.

I had lived in 13 different houses and 3 caravans by the time I was 12!

My grandmother pretty much only "spicks" the doric, which I can understand, but not completely respond in.