The Friday Joke
pedylan
Posts: 768
Whatever happened to it?
Anyway, got sent this recently. Amused me.
Her Diary
Saturday. I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a
bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I
thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no
comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we
could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was
wrong - he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was
upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.
On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept
driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I
love you, too."
When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do
with me anymore. He just sat there and watched T.V.; he seemed distant and
absent.
Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed and
to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt
that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.
I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him
with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried
until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his
thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY
Saturday. The Arsenal lost again but at least I got a shag.
Anyway, got sent this recently. Amused me.
Her Diary
Saturday. I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a
bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I
thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no
comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we
could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was
wrong - he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was
upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.
On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept
driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I
love you, too."
When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do
with me anymore. He just sat there and watched T.V.; he seemed distant and
absent.
Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed and
to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt
that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.
I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him
with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried
until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his
thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY
Saturday. The Arsenal lost again but at least I got a shag.
Where the neon madmen climb
0
Comments
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Real story by a Man who was standing in a queue in
Tesco's.........
I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned.
I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.
I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.
Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food??0 -
I lol'd.Shazam !!0
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Proud Dads - too funny! Four friends, who
hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited
at a party. After several drinks, one of the
men had to use the rest room.
Those who remained talked about their kids.
The first guy said, 'My son is my pride and
joy. He started working at a successful
company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied
Economics and Business Administration and soon
began to climb the corporate ladder and now
he's the President of the company. He became so
rich that he gave his best friend a top of the
line Mercedes for his birthday.'
The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific!
My son is also my pride and joy. He started
working for a big airline, and then went to
flight school to become a pilot Eventually he
became a partner in the company, where he owns
the majority of its assets. He's so rich that
he gave his best fr iend a brand new jet for
his birthday.'
The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My
son studied in the best universities and became
an engineer. Then he started his own
construction company and is now a
multimillionaire. He also gave away something
very nice and expensive to his best friend for
his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.'
The three friends congratulated each other just
as the fourth returned from the restroom and
asked: 'what are all the Congratulations for?'
One of the three said: 'We were talking about
the pride we feel for the successes of our
sons. What about your son?'
The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes
a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'
The three friends said: 'What a shame. What a
disappointment.'
The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed.
He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done
too bad either His birthday was two weeks ago,
and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot
mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line
Mercedes from his three boyfriends.
Can we fix it?
Yes we can!0 -
Proud Dads - too funny! Four friends, who
hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited
at a party. After several drinks, one of the
men had to use the rest room.
Those who remained talked about their kids.
The first guy said, 'My son is my pride and
joy. He started working at a successful
company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied
Economics and Business Administration and soon
began to climb the corporate ladder and now
he's the President of the company. He became so
rich that he gave his best friend a top of the
line Mercedes for his birthday.'
The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific!
My son is also my pride and joy. He started
working for a big airline, and then went to
flight school to become a pilot Eventually he
became a partner in the company, where he owns
the majority of its assets. He's so rich that
he gave his best fr iend a brand new jet for
his birthday.'
The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My
son studied in the best universities and became
an engineer. Then he started his own
construction company and is now a
multimillionaire. He also gave away something
very nice and expensive to his best friend for
his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.'
The three friends congratulated each other just
as the fourth returned from the restroom and
asked: 'what are all the Congratulations for?'
One of the three said: 'We were talking about
the pride we feel for the successes of our
sons. What about your son?'
The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes
a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'
The three friends said: 'What a shame. What a
disappointment.'
The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed.
He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done
too bad either His birthday was two weeks ago,
and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot
mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line
Mercedes from his three boyfriends.
Can we fix it?
Yes we can!0
