OT: Steven Gerrard: That Southport Incident & Queen
spen666
Posts: 17,709
(to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)
Is this our Stevie?
Captain of LFC?
Arrested in Southport
All caught on CCTV.
Open "The Sun"
It's there on Page One, you'll see.
I'm just a Scouser
I need some help
Because I'm Huyton-born, Huyton-bred
Once a Blue, now a Red.
Whatever the truth is, it doesn't really matter to me.
[Piano: Dumm di dum dum, dumm di dum dum]
Rafa! It's Stevie here.
I've just t*watted a DJ
And they've taken him away.
Rafa, we were four points clear
But now I fear we'll throw it all away!
Rafa! Ooooooooooh.
Didn't mean to make you sigh
If I'm not back in time to play at Preston Tinker on, tinker on, my career is all in tatters....
[Piano: Dum di dum di dum, dum di dum di dum]
Too late! It's Walton Jail.
I don't think that I can cope
I can't bend down for the soap.
Goodbye everybody - I've got to go
Gotta leave the Kop behind and face the Bench.
Rafa! Ooooooooooo! (Anyway the sh*it blows) I don't want to go to jail I sometimes wish I'd never joined Liverpoo-ool!
[Piano, guitar and stuff]
I see a little silhouetto of Hamman
There's ,more dosh, there's more dosh if I sign for Man City But joining such a sh*ite team is very very frightening to me
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry! He's Magnific-o-o-o-o
I'm just a poor boy from a Scouse family He's just a poor boy from a Scouse family Spare him his job says Co-Coach Sammy Lee
Piano: Tinkle, tinkle tinkle
Easy come easy go! Will you let me go?
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
No no no no no no!
Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Get me out!
A Big House con has a shower set aside for me! For meee!
For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
[Big Guitar Riff]
So you think you can say my career's in decline!
So you think you can suggest my kids are not mine!
Oh DJ! Can't do this to me DJ!
Just gotta get out! Just gotta get right outta here!
[More guitar and then the slow bit]
My career is now in tatters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters! Nothing really matters to me!
Anyway the sh*it blows!
Is this our Stevie?
Captain of LFC?
Arrested in Southport
All caught on CCTV.
Open "The Sun"
It's there on Page One, you'll see.
I'm just a Scouser
I need some help
Because I'm Huyton-born, Huyton-bred
Once a Blue, now a Red.
Whatever the truth is, it doesn't really matter to me.
[Piano: Dumm di dum dum, dumm di dum dum]
Rafa! It's Stevie here.
I've just t*watted a DJ
And they've taken him away.
Rafa, we were four points clear
But now I fear we'll throw it all away!
Rafa! Ooooooooooh.
Didn't mean to make you sigh
If I'm not back in time to play at Preston Tinker on, tinker on, my career is all in tatters....
[Piano: Dum di dum di dum, dum di dum di dum]
Too late! It's Walton Jail.
I don't think that I can cope
I can't bend down for the soap.
Goodbye everybody - I've got to go
Gotta leave the Kop behind and face the Bench.
Rafa! Ooooooooooo! (Anyway the sh*it blows) I don't want to go to jail I sometimes wish I'd never joined Liverpoo-ool!
[Piano, guitar and stuff]
I see a little silhouetto of Hamman
There's ,more dosh, there's more dosh if I sign for Man City But joining such a sh*ite team is very very frightening to me
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry! He's Magnific-o-o-o-o
I'm just a poor boy from a Scouse family He's just a poor boy from a Scouse family Spare him his job says Co-Coach Sammy Lee
Piano: Tinkle, tinkle tinkle
Easy come easy go! Will you let me go?
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
No no no no no no!
Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Get me out!
A Big House con has a shower set aside for me! For meee!
For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
[Big Guitar Riff]
So you think you can say my career's in decline!
So you think you can suggest my kids are not mine!
Oh DJ! Can't do this to me DJ!
Just gotta get out! Just gotta get right outta here!
[More guitar and then the slow bit]
My career is now in tatters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters! Nothing really matters to me!
Anyway the sh*it blows!
Want to know the Spen666 behind the posts?
Then read MY BLOG @ http://www.pebennett.com
Twittering @spen_666
Then read MY BLOG @ http://www.pebennett.com
Twittering @spen_666
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Comments
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Chapeau
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love it spen - apart from the bit about Man City
forwarding it to husband right now
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Even as a Red that made me laugh out loud 0
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I'd post it to a Liverpool fan, but I don't know any.
To err is human, but to make a real balls up takes a super computer.0 -
Spen, even as a Red, I find that funny.
Not quite as funny if he gets sent down however !! How will we cope ??"There are no hills, there is no wind, I feel no pain !"
"A bad day on the bike is always better than a good day in the office !"0 -
Great stuff!0 -
8/10, could do better.0
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Mint! Remember that you are an Englishman and thus have won first prize in the lottery of life.0
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Good man. I'm sure Stevie will ave one eye on tonights game, when the mighty UNITED knock f**k out of Wigan tonight. Don't worry Stevie I'll be singing you a song tonight. Me and 75,000 others. 0
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Sirius631 wrote:I'd post it to a Liverpool fan, but I don't know any.
youll find plenty in norway, ireland and southern england or on a saturday morning wandering around liverpool city centre looking lost clutching their bag of shite from the redshite megastore'dont forget lads, one evertonian is worth twenty kopites'0 -
Yep...I laughed out loud when I first saw Liverpudlian Rhapsody on the BBC website about a week ago!! Whoever wrote it is a genius. I'd rather walk than use Shimano0
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Ouch, Tony. Wigan must be really suffering after the "Mighty United" knocked fu*k out of them last night.
Shame about Wazza's hammy. (Wazza? very apt I suppose, for such a wanker I mean. Once a blue always a United scum bag chav c*ck, bright boy). sorry lost it for a minute there.0 -
oakins242 wrote:Ouch, Tony. Wigan must be really suffering after the "Mighty United" knocked fu*k out of them last night.
Shame about Wazza's hammy. (Wazza? very apt I suppose, for such a wanker I mean. Once a blue always a United scum bag chav c*ck, bright boy). sorry lost it for a minute there.
Aaaaaaaaand breath 0 -
Oh, come on, how could anyone not love Wayne Rooney, with his cheeky little stamps and his hilarious tirades at the referee... and now he's shaving his head he basically looks like a human body with a giant testicle placed oddly on his shoulders. Pity really, 'cos I think that apart from his vile temper on the pitch, he seems like a basically honest person. English referees and Alex Ferguson let him get away with far too much, so when he plays for England, he'll always be at risk of getting himself sent off.
Oh, God, we've got to play them this weekend with a threadbare squad.
Oh, well, just have to wait for them to collapse under the weight of their massive debt, then I can have a really, really top laugh at them.
Champions of Europe and England and last year's income still couldn't service the interest on the hundreds of millions of pounds owed to the banks And that's during a time in which record amounts of money were coming into football, something that's unlikely to be repeated
And now Man City can outspend any other team on the planet, so in a few years time Man Utd will be able to win F all
Just a year or two more of watching United win things and it'll all be over, the nightmare will end. And Barcelona should slaughter them if they meet in the CL this year.0
