Fridays tip...Water park fatties....

gtvlusso

When entering a water park and heading for the "fun" slides, the ones where you have to sit in an inflatable ring that takes 2 people, find yourself a fat person for the all important rear position in the inflatable - the increase in acceleration, cornering geometry (sidewall height) and splash factor are sigificantly better than using lightweight skinnies.....as proved by my fat mate!

I am 33......And I enjoy a good water slide as much as a 3 year old. Thats good science that is...

Sewinman

There are razor blades stuck to the sides of the scary tubes - FACT....and a fat kid once split his stomach open doing a belly flop from the top diving board - FACT.

always_tyred

gtvlusso wrote:

When entering a water park and heading for the "fun" slides, the ones where you have to sit in an inflatable ring that takes 2 people, find yourself a fat person for the all important rear position in the inflatable - the increase in acceleration, cornering geometry (sidewall height) and splash factor are sigificantly better than using lightweight skinnies.....as proved by my fat mate!

I am 33......And I enjoy a good water slide as much as a 3 year old. Thats good science that is...

You've been reading "Top Tips" again haven't you?

- Save money on expensive personalised car number plates by simply changing your name to match your existing plate. - Mr. KVL 741Y,

- Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand closer to the object you wish to view.

gtvlusso

This is a top tip you can actually acheive though!

attica

Make yourself a handy chainmail cardigan using paperclips

linsen

Save a fortune on laundry bills. Give your dirty shirts to Oxfam.
They will wash and iron them and you can buy them back for fifty pence. ...

lost_in_thought

Where is there a water park that is not deathly cold at this time of year?

I love water parks.

biondino

Oxfam and others charge a fortune for clothes these days!

gtvlusso

lost_in_thought

In Corfu.....not much help really...

graeme_s-2

lost_in_thought wrote:

Where is there a water park that is not deathly cold at this time of year?

I love water parks.

Water World in Stoke on Trent is heated and in doors!

heavymental

Godamn I love a water park! There's a good one down near Southampton called Tower Park I think and I'm off to a new one on pembrokeshire this weekend hopefully!

I'm 30 and I love a water park.

Kieran_Burns

Additional to the above.

When riding the log flume (at wherever) always put the fat gits at the front. The resulting wave is truly stupendous and EVERYONE gets a soaking.

This action has got me (and friends) a standing ovation at Alton Towers, from the attendants! Also, a shake of the hand from a guy who came on for giving him and his wife "the best laugh and biggest soaking" they'd every had.

I may being growing old, but I utterly refuse to grow up

linsen

biondino wrote:

Oxfam and others charge a fortune for clothes these days!

Still cheaper than a wife to wash them for you though

lost_in_thought

I might go to a water park this weekend... Stoke on Trent is quite a long way though.

heavymental

I've another water park tip. Try and cause a blockage in the pipe. Line up a few mates and head down one after another and stop in the pipe. Somebody will be oblivious and come hurtling down at which point you all try and get started before you get dynorodded out of there. A load of you will then come flying out of the end in a big lump and try and swim away underwater before you get in trouble with the lifeguards.

Great fun.

heavymental

Swindon is closer LiT. The Oasis used to be my local. Not bad for a bit of a laugh. Surely there is a good one in/near London somewhere?! If not, Boris needs to have a word with the planning dept.

gtvlusso

I have to go rowing this weekend......no water park antics for me, just pain and suffering in a racing boat.

Kieran_Burns

lost_in_thought wrote:

I might go to a water park this weekend... Stoke on Trent is quite a long way though.

You can scream past my place and give me a scalping on the way... Derbyish = just off the A50 on the way to Stoke :twisted:

gtvlusso

I will offer a beer/wine for someone over 30 to wear water wings and have a photo taken in a water park......

You know it makes sense.

spen666

gtvlusso wrote:

When entering a water park and heading for the "fun" slides, the ones where you have to sit in an inflatable ring that takes 2 people, find yourself a fat person for the all important rear position in the inflatable - the increase in acceleration, cornering geometry (sidewall height) and splash factor are sigificantly better than using lightweight skinnies.....as proved by my fat mate!

I am 33......And I enjoy a good water slide as much as a 3 year old. Thats good science that is...

Do you commute by water slide?


Just wondering why this is in commute

lost_in_thought

Spen, nobody else seems to mind.

Do you commute by grumpiness and pedantry?

tailwindhome

lost_in_thought wrote:

Spen, nobody else seems to mind.

Do you commute by grumpiness and pedantry?

Now come on!

That review of Spen66's post could lead to legal action being taken against you, Bike Radar and every one who reads it.


It may even be ASSAULT!



Now I've gone and quoted it :shock:

I'll be sued too.

Thanks

Thanks a lot!

lost_in_thought

Kieran_Burns

Assault and bitchery?


GBH - Grevious Bitchery Harm?

Bikerbaboon

lost_in_thought wrote:

Spen, nobody else seems to mind.

Do you commute by grumpiness and pedantry?

does grumpiness and pedantry come with a fcn adjustment........... got to be worse than a brompton?.....


on a side note if i scalp some one on a water slide whats the fcn ? ( and do water wings give bounuses) :P

rhext

Sometimes feels like commuting by water slide. Particularly in the winter.

Kieran_Burns

Bikerbaboon wrote:

does grumpiness and pedantry come with a fcn adjustment........... got to be worse than a brompton?.....


on a side note if i scalp some one on a water slide whats the fcn ? ( and do water wings give bounuses) :P

I reckon waterwings are the equivalent of panniers - so they would in fact LOWER your FCN

Hmmm... interesting parallels - girlyboy shavers would be higher in the FCN when in the pool

Wearing swimming caps would be the same as lycra

Them silly bloody goggles would count as wrap-arounds.


Where would this end?

Speedos = team kit?

cee

Don't know about everyone else, but I would love to commute to work by waterslide!

Bikerbaboon

SO for london redig all the tube lines with a slight gradiant paint them with a plastisized paint. and then flow water..... easy. Still working on what to do with the rats,



Mr borris I think i have the road congestion problem sorted.

El Gordo

cee wrote:

Don't know about everyone else, but I would love to commute to work by waterslide!

Me too, but the journey home would be a nightmare.

Kieran_Burns

Bikerbaboon wrote:

..... easy. Still working on what to do with the rats,

They can still drive to Parliament :P