2012 Oylmpic Champion

howiejmidlands

I hope you have all been encouraged by our road, track, and bmx cyclists.

Now just returning to the sport i have loved, i want to compete in 2012,,,,,,,,,how?

Track......too fat, not enough power.
Road,,,,,, too old, fat git,
BMX,,,,,,, be fair, nver cocked my leg over one of those bikes ever, too dangerous.

So, how do i get my event included in 2012.

Easy......make up your own.

So,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,your fat bloke here is going to drop a line to Lord Coe to include weight limited (restricted) unicycle track sprinting.

I will of course be in the heavyweight (110kg and over) where riders will be obliged to cover one lap of the rack, against an opponent on a unicycle of any chain/wheel length and weight bodily contact of ANY sort is allowed such as punching, gouging, kicking, grabbing etc.

Really its boxing on a bike, ok......................... one wheeled bike,

Anyone got an address for the 2012 Olympic Committee???

Oh and yes i have started training, it will take 4 bloody years to get the balance on a unicycle then get to clobber some fat git........sorry opponent!!!

So how do i get a coach, BC sposnsorhip and ....oooh er i need something......oh yes, a unicycle!!!

ChrisLS

...sounds like a plan Howie 8) ...can I be in the team?...I will make the tea and go out for the buns...

LangerDan

Problem is that Japan will probably enter a 150 kg Sumo wrestler on a unicycle made from the front nosewheel of a 747 and it will all end in tears.......unless he gets his mawashi tangled up in the spokes and ends up garrotting his own @rse.

howiejmidlands

Ah i have a cunning plan.
Weight category is 110kg to 115kg only.......

DavidBelcher

I'd like to see cyclo-cross in the Summer Olympics, but you need to guarantee damp, cool weather to get the full effect (no Winter Olympics would have it as there'd be too much snow), so maybe London 2012 is a suitable venue based on the last two summers we've had ; they could always slot it in as a demonstration event. Failing that, it would fit nicely into an Autumn Olympics, though goodness knows what other sports would go with it (cross-country running, maybe?)!

David