Etiquette of the local clubber

big dunk

If you have looked at the pinarello thread you will know i,m just about to dive into the mad mad world of a local club.Please, tell me i don,t have to pluck a chicken with my teeth or ride with swarfiga and iron fillings down the back of the lycra,s on my first sunday run.Any good wind ups,piss takes or absolute dont even go there,stories?lets have a grin on this one.

Smokin Joe

In many clubs it is customary for the newest member to allow the reigning club champion to pleasure himself on that person. To refuse is considered bad form, so it is advisable to take a tube of copperslip on the first run.

craigenty

It's also customary on your first club run to first identify the Club's only 1st Cat then try your damdest to drop him on all the hills

xover_runner

I was laughed at for having dust caps on my valves and also that little locknut that screws the valve down on to the rim still in place. I think that was the equivalent of sporting a mullet and wearing white socks with a suit.

If your shoes aren't Sidi, Carnac or Shimano you may be considered slightly odd or even eccentric.

Never, ever show too much interest in other member leg shaving habits. In my club this is taboo, it's like discussing incest or showing an interest in morriss dancing.

orv

xover_runner wrote:

I was laughed at for having dust caps on my valves and also that little locknut that screws the valve down on to the rim still in place

hmmm but the dust caps keep the crud out of the valves when you're commuting. and the little locknuts make it a damned site easier to inflate when you've got a fully flat tyre, deep section rims, short valves and a crap hand pump.

xover_runner

Agree. I think the anti argument was speed when mending a puncture and about 1g weight reduction!

big dunk

You,re in danger of slipping into bike talk again!let,s keep this one light Anyone have the stitching in there shorts go first climb at the front of the pack :shock: How do i know who the leader of the pack is anyway does he wear a helmet with horns or a horn with a helmet.Should be easy to spot i supose ,how naive of me

Bronzie

big dunk wrote:

How do i know who the leader of the pack is

That'll be the one that will moan that:
- your mudflap is too short
- your legs are too hairy
- your kit doesn't match your bike
- you are half-wheeling the clubs only 1st Cat
- you are wearing your cap too low over your eyes etc. etc.

The only traditional wind-up I've ever encountered on joining a new club is to be left for dead while everyone else charges off into the distance. Being violated by the club's 1st Cat was obviously reserved for someone more appealing.