obsessive-compulsive cyclist
You might be an obsessive-compulsive(anal retentive) cyclist if:
1. You look upon energy bars and gels as fine dining.
2. You know the complete history of the presta valve.
3. You have ever been involved in a debate, about helmets, that lasted 4 or more hours.
4. You feel that you once lost a race because of a bar end plug problem.
5. You come very close to self destructing upon hearing even the slightest creak,
rattle, or scrape from your bike.
6. As a certified member of "The Grease of the Week Club" you have tried, literaly,
every lube known to man.
7. You named your dog Campy.
8. You know who came in 3rd. in the 1963 TDF.
9. Your bike roof rack cost more than the car it's on.
10. You feel that your energy drink is "Regal red in appearance, with honeysuckle, red
fruits, and citrus notes. Some truffle and earth, with a distinct but pleasing taste of
toast from the barrel. Soft and velvety. Fruit forward, with sweet tannins and a
lingering fruit finish".
11. You understand the following carbon talk "visco-elastic constrained layer control".
12. You feel that 300 dollars for a stem is "reasonable".
13. You have more tools and tires than the local bike shop.
14. You monthly bike budget in more than all your other expenses combined.
15. Like fine wine you age your energy drinks.
16. You understand the geometry and math of rear derailluers.
17. You have 20 to 30 used tires, in various stages of decomposition, around the house,
that you are absolutley certain you will eventually use again.
Dennis Noward
Toledo, Ohio
USA(not canadian as some thought)
1. You look upon energy bars and gels as fine dining.
2. You know the complete history of the presta valve.
3. You have ever been involved in a debate, about helmets, that lasted 4 or more hours.
4. You feel that you once lost a race because of a bar end plug problem.
5. You come very close to self destructing upon hearing even the slightest creak,
rattle, or scrape from your bike.
6. As a certified member of "The Grease of the Week Club" you have tried, literaly,
every lube known to man.
7. You named your dog Campy.
8. You know who came in 3rd. in the 1963 TDF.
9. Your bike roof rack cost more than the car it's on.
10. You feel that your energy drink is "Regal red in appearance, with honeysuckle, red
fruits, and citrus notes. Some truffle and earth, with a distinct but pleasing taste of
toast from the barrel. Soft and velvety. Fruit forward, with sweet tannins and a
lingering fruit finish".
11. You understand the following carbon talk "visco-elastic constrained layer control".
12. You feel that 300 dollars for a stem is "reasonable".
13. You have more tools and tires than the local bike shop.
14. You monthly bike budget in more than all your other expenses combined.
15. Like fine wine you age your energy drinks.
16. You understand the geometry and math of rear derailluers.
17. You have 20 to 30 used tires, in various stages of decomposition, around the house,
that you are absolutley certain you will eventually use again.
Dennis Noward
Toledo, Ohio
USA(not canadian as some thought)
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Comments
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2 or 3 out of 17 (#3, #16, maybe #13) - phew, thought I'd get a lot more than that. Nearly get #17, but I know I won't use most of them again!0
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I must be,I even considered replying.
Doh,I just did.
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Dennis,
apologies, it was me who gave you the wrong nationality. You see, when you live in Texas, you get used to thinking anyone who gets cold in winter must be Canadian........Sorry. And you are kind of, nearly there.... (and have a sense of humour, which is appreciated by a Brit down here, as it is so singularly lacking in so many)!0 -
It's not really OCD though is it? How about always having blue tape on the left side of your handlebars, always saying the same thing when you spot roadkill, not being able to ride without a certain item of jewellery or always looking at how long it's taken you to get to certain points on your ride?You hear that? He's up there... mewing in the nerve centre of his evil empire. A ground rent increase here, a tax dodge there? he sticks his leg in the air, laughs his cat laugh... and dives back down to grooming his balls!0
