Expert cyclist and real cyclist

dennisn

Expert cyclist - Cleans and shines his amazingly expensive bike each day.
Real cyclist - Paints his, best he can afford frame, flat black so it won't get stolen.

Expert cyclist - Has supper at the best Italian resturaunt after each race.
Real cyclist - Is his waiter.

Expert cyclist - Knows everything about going fast.
Real cyclist - Actually is fast.

Expert cyclist - Owns the very best in automobiles.
Real cyclist - His bike is much more expensive than any car he ever owned.

Expert cyclist - Complains when bad weather interferes with his training.
Real cyclist - There is no bad weather to train in.

Expert cyclist - Goes into great detail about he got closed out in the final sprint.
Real cyclist - Won that race

Expert cyclist - Rides clinchers because tubular glue is too messy.
Real cyclist - Looks on gluing as a rite of passage and an art form.

Expert cyclist - Takes his bike to the shop for the slighest of noises.
Real cyclist - Is the head wrench in that shop.

blackhands

:?: Nah

aracer

Expert cyclist - Rides tubs because that's what the pros use.
Real cyclist - Doesn't see the point in messing around with glue when in reality clinchers are actually faster.

dennisn

Forgot one.

EC - Gets bummed out when cycling season ends.
RC - Didn't know there was a cycling "season".

Dennis Noward

John Stevenson

Real cyclist - doesn't big-note himself by posting inverse-snobbery-laden comparison lists to web forums.

Massimo

Harsh, but fair...

EC - spend all his time on bikeradar forums
RC - hasn't got the time 'cos he's out on his bike

dennisn

John Stevenson wrote:

Real cyclist - doesn't big-note himself by posting inverse-snobbery-laden comparison lists to web forums.

Wow, you take this stuff way, way, to seriously. It's bicycling, something to have fun on
and with.

Dennis Noward

blackhands

But its just rubbish

Shadowduck

Wow, apparently I'm neither an "expert" nor a "real" cyclist. :shock:

Maybe I should just sell the bikes and buy one of those "car" thingies to get about in?

Big Red S

So real cyclists are waiters and head mechanics?

When do they ride?

on the road

EC - Don't know how to fix a puncture

sonicred007

those comparisons sound like envy

where is this rite of passage i must've missed that real cyclist alludes to

EC Happy just cycling
RC Thinks everyone on a better bike is faking it and will give up soon; and is some how part of an anti- cycling movement that paradoxically is investing money and time in cycling

pliptrot

Dennisn,

Excellent. The detractors: don't be so uncharitable, that's a Canadian demonstrating humour (humor), which is evidently lacking on this forum.

PhilofCas

pliptrot wrote:

Dennisn,

Excellent. The detractors: don't be so uncharitable, that's a Canadian demonstrating humour (humor), which is evidently lacking on this forum.

Ooohh no it's not.

(cue: Ooohh yes it is, Panto season just round the corner)



(RC - just on his way out 0700hrs uk! )

dennisn

I am really in awe of the people who take me so seriously. Why would you think
that my ravings are anything more than a liitle bit of poking fun at cycling???? And
why are some people so offended at something that was never meant to be serious????
Dennis Noward

P.S. Lighten up there is more to come for your pleasure / displeasure as the case
may be.

sonicred007

There is no tone to a forum posting - how are we meant to spot serious from funny comments

Happens all the time with email at work and such like

Shadowduck

I gathered it was an attempt at humour, I just found it a bit too smug to be funny.

Big Red S

dennisn wrote:

I am really in awe of the people who take me so seriously.

If the original post is not to be taken seriously, why must the responses be?

sonicred007

Big Red S wrote:

dennisn wrote:

I am really in awe of the people who take me so seriously.

If the original post is not to be taken seriously, why must the responses be?

Good answer - serious or otherwise

Shadowduck

pliptrot wrote:

Dennisn,

Excellent. The detractors: don't be so uncharitable, that's a Canadian demonstrating humour (humor), which is evidently lacking on this forum.

Out of interest pliptrot, what makes you think dennisn is Canadian? Not that his nationality has any relevance to the matter at hand, but his signature is occasionally followed by "Toledo, Ohio". Doesn't rule out his being Canadian but doesn't exactly suggest it!

SteveR_100Milers

dennisn wrote:

I am really in awe of the people who take me so seriously. Why would you think
that my ravings are anything more than a liitle bit of poking fun at cycling???? And
why are some people so offended at something that was never meant to be serious????
Dennis Noward

P.S. Lighten up there is more to come for your pleasure / displeasure as the case
may be.[/quote

Erm, nice try, but not convinced sorry.

sonicred007

dennisn wrote:

Expert cyclist - Cleans and shines his amazingly expensive bike each day.
Real cyclist - Paints his, best he can afford frame, flat black so it won't get stolen.

Expert cyclist - Has supper at the best Italian resturaunt after each race.
Real cyclist - Is his waiter.

Expert cyclist - Knows everything about going fast.
Real cyclist - Actually is fast.

Expert cyclist - Owns the very best in automobiles.
Real cyclist - His bike is much more expensive than any car he ever owned.

Expert cyclist - Complains when bad weather interferes with his training.
Real cyclist - There is no bad weather to train in.

Expert cyclist - Goes into great detail about he got closed out in the final sprint.
Real cyclist - Won that race

Expert cyclist - Rides clinchers because tubular glue is too messy.
Real cyclist - Looks on gluing as a rite of passage and an art form.

Expert cyclist - Takes his bike to the shop for the slighest of noises.
Real cyclist - Is the head wrench in that shop.

Going back to the source of this debate - it's impossible to see where the humour lies... I think a joke that needs identifying is not funny. Sorry Dennis if you feel hounded out. You may have gotten off lighter had you posted this in Cake stop with all the other real cyclists.

ut_och_cykla

Dennisn
I'm surprised no one has been along to praise/deride the humble power meter

frankblackcat

I'm with you Dennisn, the humour was obvious to me, and it did make me laugh too (as have all you previous postings). Perhaps it was a little to close to the bone for the thinner skinned out there.

It's always seemed unfortunate to me that so many forums across the entireity of the information super highway are filled with self righteous humourless dullards. No doubt that comment will incur their wrath.

caw35slr

Shadowduck wrote:

Wow, apparently I'm neither an "expert" nor a "real" cyclist. :shock:

LOL. Maybe you're just a cyclist. I hope that's what I am - I quite like the idea of not conforming to (other people's) stereotypes... ;-)

aracer

Was faintly amusing, but so horribly spoilt by suggesting the real cyclist might be snobbish about tyres.

on the road

Yes, someone might have been snobbish about tyres but it's not the end of the world.

richardjallen

A real cyclist can get away with not cleaning their bike every day but has to use tubes instead of ubiquitous clinchers and clincher rims :? And they have a C A R :? :?

pneumatic

Blimey, guys! Lighten up a bit.

It's a forum, not the Houses of Parliament.

We all like to define ourselves as the "in" group and we all enjoy taking a poke at the "out" group. Most people have the emotional intelligence to realise that and not get into a tizz about it.

Roadies v Mountain Bikers; Arsenal v Tottenham; Scotland v Engirland; us and them, and after all we're all just ordinary men (or women). Let's all get a life, eh? (and I include myself in that.)

sonicred007

it's not the houses of parliament and this forum will run its course until we all bored with it - Dennis certainly has