You know you're in Halfords when....

shouldbeinbed
shouldbeinbed Posts: 2,660
edited June 2012 in The cake stop
You ask the spotty child who is manning the bike hut counter for a 170mm left hand pedal crank for a square bottom bracket lug and he brings you a chain whip.

(it was for the eldests bso work hack bike, I'm not recommending the H place for best bike parts)

Comments

  • desweller
    desweller Posts: 5,175
    :lol:
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  • turnerjohn
    turnerjohn Posts: 1,069
    you should see what you get when you are for some corking :shock:
  • CambsNewbie
    CambsNewbie Posts: 564
    All the signage around you and the staff uniforms say 'Halfords'???
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    When you walk in a shop with a bright orange frontage with HALFORDS in black letters written on it.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • MattC59
    MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    When there's the constant sound of scraping, as knuckles drag on the floor.
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • greasedscotsman
    greasedscotsman Posts: 6,962
    You see Shouldbeinbed with a chainwhip in his hand?
  • wiffachip
    wiffachip Posts: 861
    when your lass is in New Look
  • .... the sub woofer car stereo system on managers special suddenly pumps out some drum and bass at 120dbA

    .... you ask for the cabinet containing the decent tools to be opened and it takes 45 minutes for the spotty oik with the keys to turn up

    .... you want to buy the Thule roof rack and ask to have the empty cardboard box on display filled with the actual goods and they say that they can't find them.
  • daveyroids
    daveyroids Posts: 223
    you lift up a bike and the wheels drop off.
  • steelie600
    steelie600 Posts: 519
    When all the bike parts are 20% more than everywhere else.

    When the counter staff are 12 and have acne and dodgy haircuts

    When the counter staff have no idea what a "SOCKET for a Hollowtech II BB" is....Nor a spanner for same application for that matter.

    When they charge people £20 to change an inner tube on a LOOSE WHEEL (the tyre was flat and this poor woman came in with it and it took the lad no more than 2 minutes including blowing it up. I wouldnt have charged her at the motorbike shop I work at)

    Theres more shall I go on
    Idiot ^^^^^^^^^

    Ralph
  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 40,217
    steelie600 wrote:
    When all the bike parts are 20% more than everywhere else.

    When the counter staff are 12 and have acne and dodgy haircuts

    When the counter staff have no idea what a "SOCKET for a Hollowtech II BB" is....Nor a spanner for same application for that matter.

    When they charge people £20 to change an inner tube on a LOOSE WHEEL (the tyre was flat and this poor woman came in with it and it took the lad no more than 2 minutes including blowing it up. I wouldnt have charged her at the motorbike shop I work at)

    Theres more shall I go on

    Thing is, they have to work on the amount of hours most of their staff would take to do the same job - sounds like the lad in question was too good to be working there! :lol:
  • steelie600
    steelie600 Posts: 519
    You know what thats quite a valid point!!
    Idiot ^^^^^^^^^

    Ralph
  • hmm
    hmm Posts: 39
    Said spotty oik gives you the catalogue to find your own price for a wheel, and the misogynist scumbag in the queue in front of you insists on being over friendly and swearing loudly (small child with him, and a faint whiff of "all afternoon in the pub"). Last Friday, Bletchley. Nice.
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  • southdownswolf
    southdownswolf Posts: 1,525
    If it's that bad, why the +*(% did you go in there?


    I do wonder sometimes, why do people insist going into Halfords if all they are going to complain about the experiance?
  • I asked where the copper grease was and the assistant gave me a blank look and said they didn't sell that. He showed me to the shelf containing all the greases. There in front of us was Anti Seize Grease. :roll: Must check for alternative names for stuff before I go there again.
  • team47b
    team47b Posts: 6,424
    If it's that bad, why the +*(% did you go in there?


    I do wonder sometimes, why do people insist going into Halfords if all they are going to complain about the experiance?

    People watch TV, then complain
    People watch football, then complain
    People go to fast food places, then complain
    People...
    my isetta is a 300cc bike
  • team47b wrote:
    If it's that bad, why the +*(% did you go in there?


    I do wonder sometimes, why do people insist going into Halfords if all they are going to complain about the experiance?

    People watch TV, then complain
    People watch football, then complain
    People go to fast food places, then complain
    People...
    read posts on bikeradar, then complain
  • shouldbeinbed
    shouldbeinbed Posts: 2,660
    If it's that bad, why the +*(% did you go in there?


    I do wonder sometimes, why do people insist going into Halfords if all they are going to complain about the experiance?

    Jeez. A) I'm not psychic as to the competence of the people there at the time, it wasn't my immediate local one.

    B) I've stood up for Halfords on here before, but mainly

    C) It was Sunday afternoon LBS is shut & I'm on the retail park for something else already & needing a cheap part for a cr@p hack bike that son needed working for getting to his shift that evening. My 1st post is word for word what I asked in the bike specific area of the store. Not a difficult item and not unreasonable to be somewhat taken aback to be presented with something so completely randomly wrong.

    Ok?
  • Giraffoto
    Giraffoto Posts: 2,078
    Hmm wrote:
    . . .the misogynist scumbag in the queue in front of you insists on being over friendly and swearing loudly . . .

    How did he combine those two? "How the &*%$ are you?" at the top of his voice? Details!
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  • nicklouse
    nicklouse Posts: 50,675
    You ask the spotty child who is manning the bike hut counter for a 170mm left hand pedal crank for a square bottom bracket lug


    LOL

    Pedals dont have cranks. Bottom brackets dont have lugs.

    so what you should have asked for was a "square fit LH 170mm crank" and you would have had a 50-50 chance of getting the right thing. but then there are the different tapers and the different orientation of the "hole" so i dont think he did so bad.
    "Do not follow where the path may lead, Go instead where there is no path, and Leave a Trail."
    Parktools :?:SheldonBrown
  • shouldbeinbed
    shouldbeinbed Posts: 2,660
    nicklouse wrote:
    You ask the spotty child who is manning the bike hut counter for a 170mm left hand pedal crank for a square bottom bracket lug


    LOL

    Pedals dont have cranks. Bottom brackets dont have lugs.

    so what you should have asked for was a "square fit LH 170mm crank" and you would have had a 50-50 chance of getting the right thing. but then there are the different tapers and the different orientation of the "hole" so i dont think he did so bad.

    :D I'd got the orientation and width of the hole ready to check against the chain whip
  • macleod113
    macleod113 Posts: 560
    They break your bike, the shop staff tell you to do one, you write to customer servises to complain and then the shop manager calls you full of apologies and offers of cash to cover the damage!

    swines! cost me a week of commuting that did!
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  • willhub
    willhub Posts: 821
    steelie600 wrote:
    When all the bike parts are 20% more than everywhere else.

    When the counter staff are 12 and have acne and dodgy haircuts

    When the counter staff have no idea what a "SOCKET for a Hollowtech II BB" is....Nor a spanner for same application for that matter.

    When they charge people £20 to change an inner tube on a LOOSE WHEEL (the tyre was flat and this poor woman came in with it and it took the lad no more than 2 minutes including blowing it up. I wouldnt have charged her at the motorbike shop I work at)

    Theres more shall I go on

    What is the socket for a Hollowtech 2 BB? I don't know, all I know is, the crankset, the BB cups, the preload cap, the little hook thing to stock over tightening I presume?, the bolts, that's it, and the special tool to tighten the cups to the frame.
  • desweller
    desweller Posts: 5,175
    willhub wrote:
    steelie600 wrote:
    When all the bike parts are 20% more than everywhere else.

    When the counter staff are 12 and have acne and dodgy haircuts

    When the counter staff have no idea what a "SOCKET for a Hollowtech II BB" is....Nor a spanner for same application for that matter.

    When they charge people £20 to change an inner tube on a LOOSE WHEEL (the tyre was flat and this poor woman came in with it and it took the lad no more than 2 minutes including blowing it up. I wouldnt have charged her at the motorbike shop I work at)

    Theres more shall I go on

    What is the socket for a Hollowtech 2 BB? I don't know, all I know is, the crankset, the BB cups, the preload cap, the little hook thing to stock over tightening I presume?, the bolts, that's it, and the special tool to tighten the cups to the frame.

    That would be the socket then?
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  • hmm
    hmm Posts: 39
    Giraffoto wrote:
    Hmm wrote:
    . . .the misogynist scumbag in the queue in front of you insists on being over friendly and swearing loudly . . .

    How did he combine those two? "How the &*%$ are you?" at the top of his voice? Details!

    By being stupidly matey with the "boy assistant", and then proceeding to recount a conversation with his 'craic hoare' girlfriend involving something along the lines of her asking if her derriere looked "big in this", and him then issuing forth a furious tirade of profanity in response. She was with him, carrying (I presume their) child while she laughed nervously. 8 Ace, of Viz fame, methinks.
    Triban 3 - very red
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  • benno68
    benno68 Posts: 1,689
    you wake up in a cold sweat, it seamed so real but luckily it was just a nightmare.
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