Why Bicycles Are Better Than Women

rogerthecat
rogerthecat Posts: 669
edited May 2009 in The bottom bracket
Normally you only get 10 however.


1. Bicycles don't pregnant.
2. You can ride your bicycle any time of the month.
3. Bicycles don't have parents.
4. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.
5. You can share your bicycles with your friends.
6. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you've ridden.
7. When riding, you and your bicycle can arrive at the same time.
8. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have now.
9. Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycles.
10. Bicycles don't care if you buy bicycle magazines.
11. You'll never hear, "Suprise, you're goning to own a new bicycle"
unless you go out and buy one yourself.
12. If your bicycle goes flat, you can fix it.
13. If your bicycle is too loose, you can tighten it.
14. If your bicycle gets misaligned, you don't have to discuss
politics with it.
15 (Censored)
16. You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your bicycle.
17. If you say bad things to your bicycle, you don't have to apologize
before you ride it again.
18. You can ride your bicycle as long as you want and it wont get
sore.
19. You can stop riding your bicycle as soon as you want and it wont
get frustrated.
20. Your parents wont remain in touch with your old bicycle after you
dump it.
21. Bicycles don't get headaches.
22. Bicycles don't insult you if you're a bad rider.
23. Your bicyle never wants a night out with other bicycles.
24. Bicycles don't care if you're late.
25. You don't have to take a shower before you ride your bicycle.
26. If your bicycle doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better
parts.
27. You can ride your bicycle the first time you meet it without
having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.
28. The only protection you need to wear when riding your bicycle is a
decent helment.
29. When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great ride you
had the last time you were on your bicycle.

Comments

  • Chaz.Harding
    Chaz.Harding Posts: 3,144
    :lol::lol::lol:

    I've seen them before, but this is quite funny

    :lol:
    Boo-yah mofo
    Sick to the power of rad
    Fix it 'till it's broke
  • SpinningJenny
    SpinningJenny Posts: 889
    19. You can stop riding your bicycle as soon as you want and it wont get frustrated

    oh, I could be SO rude.... :D
    Ned Flanders: “You were bicycling two abreast?”
    Homer Simpson: “I wish. We were bicycling to a lake.”

    Specialized Rockhopper Pro Disc 08
  • Le Commentateur
    Le Commentateur Posts: 4,099
    Accidents with serious long-term consequences are more likely in bed than on a bike.
  • 1892
    1892 Posts: 1,690
    What's No 15 then? :lol:
    Justice for the 96
  • Homer J
    Homer J Posts: 920
    it don't complain when you ride your mates :wink:
  • NGale
    NGale Posts: 1,866
    This thread could also be entitled 'Why bicycles are better than Men' :wink:
    Officers don't run, it's undignified and panics the men
  • Crapaud
    Crapaud Posts: 2,483
    NGale wrote:
    This thread could also be entitled 'Why bicycles are better than Men' :wink:
    Bicycles put the toilet seat down? :?
    A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject - Churchill
  • NGale
    NGale Posts: 1,866
    Crapaud wrote:
    NGale wrote:
    This thread could also be entitled 'Why bicycles are better than Men' :wink:
    Bicycles put the toilet seat down? :?

    Bicycles don't need a toilet, therefore the toilet seat is always down :wink:
    Officers don't run, it's undignified and panics the men
  • nolf
    nolf Posts: 1,287
    When you get a new bicycle, you can keep riding the old one occasionally.
    "I hold it true, what'er befall;
    I feel it, when I sorrow most;
    'Tis better to have loved and lost;
    Than never to have loved at all."

    Alfred Tennyson
  • Stewie Griffin
    Stewie Griffin Posts: 4,330
    NGale wrote:
    Crapaud wrote:
    NGale wrote:
    This thread could also be entitled 'Why bicycles are better than Men' :wink:
    Bicycles put the toilet seat down? :?

    Bicycles don't need a toilet, therefore the toilet seat is always down :wink:

    Short list eh, whats number 2 then? Your Bicycle wont moan when you talk directly over Mark Cavendish's answers to Gaby Roslin's questions :evil: ?
  • robmanic1
    robmanic1 Posts: 2,150
    You don't have to cuddle your bike after riding it :oops: (i'm ashamed)
    Pictures are better than words because some words are big and hard to understand.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34335188@N07/3336802663/
  • badhand
    badhand Posts: 115
    17 - 'You don't have to say sorry' - well you still should say sorry, but that will be the end of it - your bicycle won't bring it up in a weeks time when you're about to mount it.
  • schlepcycling
    schlepcycling Posts: 1,614
    You don't have to worry about shouting out the name of another bicycle whilst you're riding your bicycle.
    'Hello to Jason Isaacs'
  • SpinningJenny
    SpinningJenny Posts: 889
    Robmanic1 wrote:
    You don't have to cuddle your bike after riding it :oops: (i'm ashamed)

    And so you should be... :wink:
    Ned Flanders: “You were bicycling two abreast?”
    Homer Simpson: “I wish. We were bicycling to a lake.”

    Specialized Rockhopper Pro Disc 08
  • LittleB0b
    LittleB0b Posts: 416
    re number 28 - are you sure that's all you need to wear?
  • badhand
    badhand Posts: 115
    Your bike won't get f***ed off if you lock it in the shed overnight...
  • pdstsp
    pdstsp Posts: 1,264
    Bikes don't ask you to decorate on a weekend/sunny weekday evening.
  • chuckcork
    chuckcork Posts: 1,471
    To point out the obvious, unless you're a real weirdo sex with your bicycle isn't going to happen....whereas with ones female bed partner it just at some point might.
    'Twas Mulga Bill, from Eaglehawk, that caught the cycling craze....
  • guilliano
    guilliano Posts: 5,495
    Women don't need lubing (most of the time)
  • robmanic1
    robmanic1 Posts: 2,150
    Women don't need inflating every time you want a ride...........Oh, hang on... :oops:
    Pictures are better than words because some words are big and hard to understand.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34335188@N07/3336802663/
  • sicknote
    sicknote Posts: 901
    You lot are so wrong funny as hell but so wrong :D
  • Bhima
    Bhima Posts: 2,145
    You don't have to pay for your bike's food when you take it out to a nice cafe.

    If there's a problem with your bike, you can just pay another guy to sort it all out for you.
  • zedders
    zedders Posts: 509
    chuckcork wrote:
    To point out the obvious, unless you're a real weirdo sex with your bicycle isn't going to happen....whereas with ones female bed partner it just at some point might.

    +1
    I love my bike, but not in the same way some of you lot obviously do! :shock:
    "I spend my petrol money on Bikes, Beer, Pizza, and Donuts "

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/38256268@N04/3517156549/
  • badhand
    badhand Posts: 115
    Your bike can leave you feeling exhausted, sweaty and a bit dirty, but you'll have no regrets and you don't have to stick around for breakfast.
  • guilliano
    guilliano Posts: 5,495
    Your bike won't complain if you give it a quickie before work
  • robmanic1
    robmanic1 Posts: 2,150
    Your bike doesn't have a better looking sister
    Pictures are better than words because some words are big and hard to understand.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34335188@N07/3336802663/
  • CHRISNOIR
    CHRISNOIR Posts: 1,400
    chuckcork wrote:
    To point out the obvious, unless you're a real weirdo sex with your bicycle isn't going to happen....whereas with ones female bed partner it just at some point might.

    There are indeed some real weirdosout there...
  • claash
    claash Posts: 145
    Are you kidding Robmanic 1 My bike definitely has a better looking sister: We just haven't got together yet! :wink:
  • rogerthecat
    rogerthecat Posts: 669
    Bump