Seemingly trivial things that intrigue you

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  • keef66keef66 Posts: 13,286
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    I don't think he's suggesting that, quite the opposite.
  • rjsterryrjsterry Posts: 15,240
    edited 16 September
    Chris Bass wrote:
    keef66 wrote:
    rjsterry wrote:
    mfin wrote:
    Life is supposed to be fun.
    What ever gave you that idea?

    Used to work with a chap who'd always tell people 'Life's hard, then you die' I suspect for millions around the world that's about it.

    Life might be fun for a privileged few, but for most people, most of the time, it isn't.

    How do you know if something is fun unless there is stuff that isn't fun?

    you could argue that the less fun a person has the more fun that fun is for that person. Like the opposite to being a drug addict - the more drugs you take the less effect they have so you need more drugs to get the same effect - it is why rock stars often die at 27 - it is the "sweet spot" for having taken drugs for long enough that you need a fair amount to get the high you want but still young and foolish enough to not no when to stop and so you overdose!

    sorry for the tangent! having a weird day - and weird for me is very weird!

    Precisely.

    Weird is just a matter of perspective.
    1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
    1980s BSA 10sp

    Liberal metropolitan, remoaner, traitor, "sympathiser", etc.
  • keef66keef66 Posts: 13,286
    Chris Bass wrote:
    keef66 wrote:
    rjsterry wrote:
    mfin wrote:
    Life is supposed to be fun.
    What ever gave you that idea?

    Used to work with a chap who'd always tell people 'Life's hard, then you die' I suspect for millions around the world that's about it.

    Life might be fun for a privileged few, but for most people, most of the time, it isn't.

    How do you know if something is fun unless there is stuff that isn't fun?

    you could argue that the less fun a person has the more fun that fun is for that person. Like the opposite to being a drug addict - the more drugs you take the less effect they have so you need more drugs to get the same effect - it is why rock stars often die at 27 - it is the "sweet spot" for having taken drugs for long enough that you need a fair amount to get the high you want but still young and foolish enough to not no when to stop and so you overdose!

    sorry for the tangent! having a weird day - and weird for me is very weird!

    That's true; for me 95% of life is definitely not fun, so I recognise it when it does happen.

    If I notice that 95% has become 99 or 100% then it's a sign that the depression is back...
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    How about, I do a long commute and don't see her in the week so her mother brings her up and not some random in a nursery?

    I'm not suggesting you're doing anything wrong - it's all down to personal circumstances and choices.

    However, "some random in a nursery" may be of be of benefit if done appropriately (we chose 1 day a week in nursery despite having family support - it was so he got used to other adults and more importantly, in our view anyway, other children his age) and I think "some random in a nursery" is a bit disparaging of those that work in that sector - but perhaps your sentiment is more that you wish your daughter to be brought up by family rather than 3rd party - which I totally get.

    Personally, I think your choice of a long commute and not seeing your child during the week is a really tough one - it's not something I could do and I'm glad I didn't have to make that choice - it was bad enough when he slept in in the mornings and I left the house before he woke ... and in the evenings it was with a heavy heart that I went off cycling before he was picked up from grandparents and asleep before I got home - but it was only once or maybe twice a week...

    I really don't know how those who work away from home (ie gone for weeks/months at a time) do it....

    I still stand by the "Don't live to work, Work to Live" - you just have to define for yourself what "Living" is ...
  • rick_chaseyrick_chasey Posts: 43,769 Lives Here
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    How about, I do a long commute and don't see her in the week so her mother brings her up and not some random in a nursery?



    I still stand by the "Don't live to work, Work to Live" - you just have to define for yourself what "Living" is ...

    Yeah not sure you really got the point.

    Working to live is a luxury, and for many it's not really a choice.

    And there's a lot of judgement around about how to live one's life, particularly when children are involved, usually around how much or little you see your children. This rhetorical question, for example
    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    .

    hmm?
  • keef66keef66 Posts: 13,286
    I must say we feel fortunate having raised our boys at a time when we could afford (just about) to get by on my salary while my wife was a stay at home mum. I don't envy couples these days when they need 2 salaries to pay a mortgage and having to constantly juggle childcare / school runs / holiday cover etc.

    Some of these things aren't really choices at all, or they are choices between one compromise or another.
  • Rolf FRolf F Posts: 16,126
    keef66 wrote:
    I must say we feel fortunate having raised our boys at a time when we could afford (just about) to get by on my salary while my wife was a stay at home mum. I don't envy couples these days when they need 2 salaries to pay a mortgage and having to constantly juggle childcare / school runs / holiday cover etc.

    Some of these things aren't really choices at all, or they are choices between one compromise or another.

    I think Ricks problem iirc is an unfortunately London-centric career choice. If you can get a half decent professional income in the provinces your likelihood of a decent quality of life is vastly improved even though house prices are still higher than they ought to be.
    Faster than a tent.......
  • chris_basschris_bass Posts: 4,857
    keef66 wrote:
    That's true; for me 95% of life is definitely not fun, so I recognise it when it does happen.

    If I notice that 95% has become 99 or 100% then it's a sign that the depression is back...

    the trick is to try and notice when that 95% becomes 96% and try and notice things early - not easy to do at all.

    I have a number of "early warning signs" that i may be heading to some darker times - things like more irritable than normal, not sleeping much, weight gain/loss, even stuff like not as quick on the bike and various other things too - i have shared these with people who see me most often so they can flag them to me too as I don't always notice them myself.

    It isn't as difficult to try and stop getting to 100% than to get back from 100% - neither is easy though
    www.conjunctivitis.com - a site for sore eyes
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    How about, I do a long commute and don't see her in the week so her mother brings her up and not some random in a nursery?



    I still stand by the "Don't live to work, Work to Live" - you just have to define for yourself what "Living" is ...

    Yeah not sure you really got the point.

    Working to live is a luxury, and for many it's not really a choice.

    And there's a lot of judgement around about how to live one's life, particularly when children are involved, usually around how much or little you see your children. This rhetorical question, for example
    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    .

    hmm?

    I think I do - I don't think you do ...

    Working to Live isn't a luxury - and for many it is a choice - one they often make subconsciously - it's working out what they're willing to sacrifice and in what timescale - so some may choose to work hard for a shorter period of time, earning sufficient to change their lifestyle later on. Others don't have the drive, willpower or believe they have the capability to do that and work a more mundane job longer term.

    Some chose to work away from home for a job that they enjoy, but forfeit the home lifestyle - but they're not forced to do that job, it's a choice.

    The question I put to you wasn't rhetorical - you know your earning potential and what that means in terms of lifestyle - do you give up city work to find a lower paid job local to home - and probably do away with the things that you can currently afford - or take the "I don't see my daughter during the week" on the chin - knowing that you'll be able to do more varied things as a family with the free time you do have.

    You don't have to answer the question or justify what you're doing to me or anyone else - other than your wife & daughter - and as long as it's fine with them, then it's good.
  • rjsterryrjsterry Posts: 15,240
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.
    1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
    1980s BSA 10sp

    Liberal metropolitan, remoaner, traitor, "sympathiser", etc.
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    rjsterry wrote:
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.
    For some - for others who hate where they're working or hate what they do or hate the impact their job has on their home life ....

    Perhaps they're chasing a career and end up somewhere they don't enjoy, but feel trapped by money and expectations
    Or perhaps it's the other way around - they're stuck in a job they find mundane - but don't feel they can risk pushing too hard incase it doesn't work and they end up with no job.

    for many of us, it's just a convenient job, pays the bills and we'll just put up ...

    I'm not there yet on the work/life balance - I don't get anywhere near enough cycling time in ;)
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    rjsterry wrote:
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.

    Admittedly I don't have kids but I find the harder I work (not necessarily hours-wise, but often comes with it) the more satisfaction I get which translates into how much I enjoy my evenings and weekends. When I'm generally motivated it spurs me on to get out and do other things outside work.

    For example, at the moment my boss has just returned from 5 months sailing to a part time basis, I've been smashing through lots of big bits of work which are far beyond my previous level of responsibility but it's been hugely enjoyable. I've also been riding my bike 5 times a week, getting fit and feeling strong. I'm generally much more positive about everything (including the OH snapping my X01 rear mech off my new bike). Don't know if that's because I like the pressure to some extent, or because being bored at work filters into out of work life for me.

    Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    Also, something that intrigues me, do the numbers in the fridge go up in terms of 'fridge power' or temperature?
  • haydenm wrote:
    Also, something that intrigues me, do the numbers in the fridge go up in terms of 'fridge power' or temperature?

    Good one. That one must be thermostatic, surely.
    and then the next thing you know
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    haydenm wrote:
    Also, something that intrigues me, do the numbers in the fridge go up in terms of 'fridge power' or temperature?

    Good one. That one must be thermostatic, surely.

    I prefer 'fridge power' but seeing as it's often referred to as the thermostat I think I'll be disappointed
  • rjsterryrjsterry Posts: 15,240
    haydenm wrote:
    haydenm wrote:
    Also, something that intrigues me, do the numbers in the fridge go up in terms of 'fridge power' or temperature?

    Good one. That one must be thermostatic, surely.

    I prefer 'fridge power' but seeing as it's often referred to as the thermostat I think I'll be disappointed

    Probably the same as the numbers on a TRV -just divisions between 0/Off and maximum output.
    1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
    1980s BSA 10sp

    Liberal metropolitan, remoaner, traitor, "sympathiser", etc.
  • rjsterryrjsterry Posts: 15,240
    slowbike wrote:
    rjsterry wrote:
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.
    For some - for others who hate where they're working or hate what they do or hate the impact their job has on their home life ....

    Perhaps they're chasing a career and end up somewhere they don't enjoy, but feel trapped by money and expectations
    Or perhaps it's the other way around - they're stuck in a job they find mundane - but don't feel they can risk pushing too hard incase it doesn't work and they end up with no job.

    for many of us, it's just a convenient job, pays the bills and we'll just put up ...

    I'm not there yet on the work/life balance - I don't get anywhere near enough cycling time in ;)

    Point is they are not mutually exclusive.
    1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
    1980s BSA 10sp

    Liberal metropolitan, remoaner, traitor, "sympathiser", etc.
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    Aaaaaaand another thing, why does no one make a fancy bean to cup coffee machine which sinks with my morning alarm? I know they existed in the 80s in some dreadful filter coffee format but things have changed.

    Ps, if anyone knows of one please post a link
  • keef66keef66 Posts: 13,286
    Depends on your fridge. If it actually has a scale in degrees C then it's self explanatory. If it's a non-specific 1-5 scale type thing then I assume higher numbers = colder fridge, and IME setting it to 5 risks freezing the contents of the salad drawer at the bottom.

    Why do they put the salad drawers at the bottom where all the cold air ends up? Salad is particularly sensitive to being frozen.

    Could somebody offer to explain TRVs to my wife? She still expects that by turning it down the room will instantly cool. I think she gets TRVs and dimmer switches mixed up.

    And while you're at it, the climate control in the car? It's like groundhog day. Get in hot car. Climate control kicks in and starts blasting cold air to get the temperature down to the 21c its always set to. Wife panics and turns everything off automatic. Minutes later complaining she's hot.
  • rick_chaseyrick_chasey Posts: 43,769 Lives Here
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    How about, I do a long commute and don't see her in the week so her mother brings her up and not some random in a nursery?



    I still stand by the "Don't live to work, Work to Live" - you just have to define for yourself what "Living" is ...

    Yeah not sure you really got the point.

    Working to live is a luxury, and for many it's not really a choice.

    And there's a lot of judgement around about how to live one's life, particularly when children are involved, usually around how much or little you see your children. This rhetorical question, for example
    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    .

    hmm?

    I think I do - I don't think you do ...

    Working to Live isn't a luxury - and for many it is a choice - one they often make subconsciously - it's working out what they're willing to sacrifice and in what timescale - so some may choose to work hard for a shorter period of time, earning sufficient to change their lifestyle later on. Others don't have the drive, willpower or believe they have the capability to do that and work a more mundane job longer term.

    Some chose to work away from home for a job that they enjoy, but forfeit the home lifestyle - but they're not forced to do that job, it's a choice.

    The question I put to you wasn't rhetorical - you know your earning potential and what that means in terms of lifestyle - do you give up city work to find a lower paid job local to home - and probably do away with the things that you can currently afford - or take the "I don't see my daughter during the week" on the chin - knowing that you'll be able to do more varied things as a family with the free time you do have.

    You don't have to answer the question or justify what you're doing to me or anyone else - other than your wife & daughter - and as long as it's fine with them, then it's good.


    Mate, you really don't have a clue.
  • pblakeneypblakeney Posts: 9,810
    haydenm wrote:
    rjsterry wrote:
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.

    Admittedly I don't have kids but I find the harder I work (not necessarily hours-wise, but often comes with it) the more satisfaction I get which translates into how much I enjoy my evenings and weekends. When I'm generally motivated it spurs me on to get out and do other things outside work.

    For example, at the moment my boss has just returned from 5 months sailing to a part time basis, I've been smashing through lots of big bits of work which are far beyond my previous level of responsibility but it's been hugely enjoyable. I've also been riding my bike 5 times a week, getting fit and feeling strong. I'm generally much more positive about everything (including the OH snapping my X01 rear mech off my new bike). Don't know if that's because I like the pressure to some extent, or because being bored at work filters into out of work life for me.

    Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change
    You don’t see the connection between cycling more and your OH breaking off your rear derailleur? :lol:
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
    I am not sure. You have no chance.
    veronese68 wrote:
    PB is the most sensible person on here.
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    pblakeney wrote:
    haydenm wrote:
    rjsterry wrote:
    A bit of a false dichotomy, this life:work thing.

    Admittedly I don't have kids but I find the harder I work (not necessarily hours-wise, but often comes with it) the more satisfaction I get which translates into how much I enjoy my evenings and weekends. When I'm generally motivated it spurs me on to get out and do other things outside work.

    For example, at the moment my boss has just returned from 5 months sailing to a part time basis, I've been smashing through lots of big bits of work which are far beyond my previous level of responsibility but it's been hugely enjoyable. I've also been riding my bike 5 times a week, getting fit and feeling strong. I'm generally much more positive about everything (including the OH snapping my X01 rear mech off my new bike). Don't know if that's because I like the pressure to some extent, or because being bored at work filters into out of work life for me.

    Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change
    You don’t see the connection between cycling more and your OH breaking off your rear derailleur? :lol:

    I've been taking the p1ss and saying she did it deliberately. She's getting quite upset about it which is either because it genuinely wasn't her fault or she's worried that I'm onto her...
  • pinnopinno Posts: 37,171
    haydenm wrote:
    ....Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change

    Kids don't add 'stress' - work, responsibility, organisation etc but not 'stress' and besides, you'll be bored of your current routine/work eventually.
    S - The Brazilian beach volleyball team
    W - Wiggle Honda
    "This year will be harder than last year. But that is good news; this year will be easier than next year."
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:
    slowbike wrote:

    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    Of course, there is a balance - but the one thing you cannot buy is more time.... so spend that time wisely.

    Ah, the naivety of suggesting it's about more money.

    How about, I do a long commute and don't see her in the week so her mother brings her up and not some random in a nursery?



    I still stand by the "Don't live to work, Work to Live" - you just have to define for yourself what "Living" is ...

    Yeah not sure you really got the point.

    Working to live is a luxury, and for many it's not really a choice.

    And there's a lot of judgement around about how to live one's life, particularly when children are involved, usually around how much or little you see your children. This rhetorical question, for example
    You've got a little sprog - do you think they'll thank you later on in life for earning more money or for spending more time with them?
    .

    hmm?

    I think I do - I don't think you do ...

    Working to Live isn't a luxury - and for many it is a choice - one they often make subconsciously - it's working out what they're willing to sacrifice and in what timescale - so some may choose to work hard for a shorter period of time, earning sufficient to change their lifestyle later on. Others don't have the drive, willpower or believe they have the capability to do that and work a more mundane job longer term.

    Some chose to work away from home for a job that they enjoy, but forfeit the home lifestyle - but they're not forced to do that job, it's a choice.

    The question I put to you wasn't rhetorical - you know your earning potential and what that means in terms of lifestyle - do you give up city work to find a lower paid job local to home - and probably do away with the things that you can currently afford - or take the "I don't see my daughter during the week" on the chin - knowing that you'll be able to do more varied things as a family with the free time you do have.

    You don't have to answer the question or justify what you're doing to me or anyone else - other than your wife & daughter - and as long as it's fine with them, then it's good.


    Mate, you really don't have a clue.
    Yes - I do ... I don't think you get my point in the slightest - the fact that you're arguing says that you're thinking about it ...
  • rick_chaseyrick_chasey Posts: 43,769 Lives Here
    No, you really don’t understand the financials.
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    No, you really don’t understand the financials.
    blah blah blah.... money money money ....
  • haydenmhaydenm Posts: 2,724
    pinno wrote:
    haydenm wrote:
    ....Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change

    Kids don't add 'stress' - work, responsibility, organisation etc but not 'stress' and besides, you'll be bored of your current routine/work eventually.

    I didn't mean it to sound quite like that, I mean that I have colleagues who get bogged down by the stress of work and it begins to feel oppressive as they have responsibilities at home which I don't have at the moment
  • slowbikeslowbike Posts: 8,345
    haydenm wrote:
    pinno wrote:
    haydenm wrote:
    ....Not having kids must play a part, I don't feel tied down by the stress so it's quite exciting. If I had kids that might change

    Kids don't add 'stress' - work, responsibility, organisation etc but not 'stress' and besides, you'll be bored of your current routine/work eventually.

    I didn't mean it to sound quite like that, I mean that I have colleagues who get bogged down by the stress of work and it begins to feel oppressive as they have responsibilities at home which I don't have at the moment

    yup- kids certainly change the priorities for many - not all though.
  • pinnopinno Posts: 37,171
    No, you really don’t understand the financials.

    You choose to live in the smoke.
    With that comes the benefits of all the bright lights of the big city.

    The down side is cost of living, transport and most importantly - work/life balance.
    The cost of living and the demands that places on you are compromising that whole work/life balance.
    This is your choice. You cannot complain about it as you have the power to alter your circumstances.

    I for one, would not make decisions and choices that would compromise the time I currently have available with my children.
    I am so glad I left Cheltenham. That was a good decision.That was a choice I made.
    S - The Brazilian beach volleyball team
    W - Wiggle Honda
    "This year will be harder than last year. But that is good news; this year will be easier than next year."
  • rick_chaseyrick_chasey Posts: 43,769 Lives Here
    Mate I don’t live in the smoke.

    Don’t come on here judging people’s choices when you’re not aware of all the facts.
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